I know when tranquil arrives...

I know when tranquil arrives...

A Poem by Sweet_pale_cacophony



























Yawns out
phlegmatic limpid calm
from eroded human surfaces..
Seated so snugly between unflappable wings
tucked right there
borrowings from neatly scheduled days..
Even as this calm numbs me
rocks me to sleep on its lap..
Easily obtainable dolorous passiveness
means not much to me..
I can mock such
flip it away like used cards.

I belong to callous calm
which spirals out from colossal chaos..
As winding soft smoke
rises in concurrence
from incandescence of incense..

For i was born unto imperfection
unkempt and nettled..
Peace never came pursed
between my infantile lips..
Just as a golden spoon
was not tucked in lines of my fate.
My deft fingers thereon
have learned to untangle insane mess..
Scratch delirium fed surface
that i know..would open up into
microcosm of imperishable tranquil..
Not fooled by apparent bedlam
i cherish
Pale white infinite rod of being
a few frazzled nerves here and there
surging their beautiful myelin heads from it..



© 2010 Sweet_pale_cacophony


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It is so rate to find traquility in the world
yet alone in us...moments of pure joy where we, our soul and our world around is are one...moments rare as the golden spoon you mention, yet we recognize them when they happen and savor every moment of them knowing they have a short life...like dissipating smoke...We were in Venice once in early morning...in a gondola... Sliding through the inky water (it seems so at night) we held each other...the world was silent save the water lapping against the hull of the gondola and the buildings that seemed to spring from the water...we passed the home of Marco Polo...still standing... Still inhabited...and for a few moments, the golden thread of time seemed to break and the moment was perfect tranquil...
we just sat in the silent night...the moonlight reflecting from the lacquered gunwales...we could almost hear the starlight sizzle as it hit the water to be reflected to our eyes...sitting there...my arms around the woman I love...amazing...
I love this thought-provoking piece...you writing, as always, sizzles with beautiful words and artful alliteration...the only criticism I have is that it ended too soon...

Posted 14 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

microcosm of imperishable tranquil... i love that...

Posted 13 Years Ago


All the language here echoes the theme beautifully. Bravo!

Posted 13 Years Ago


Great to read material where it is obvious the writer loves the rhythm of the syllables of individual words; this ensure the whole piece takes on rhythms at various parts that ensure the musicality of the whole poem. The tone is held and is absolutely appropriate to the subject matter. I could 'see' the author. (Or my version of her) 'Unkempt and nettled' is a great image, but there are more than a few excellent pairings that are novel and absolutely fitting. (I confess that I had to look up 'myelin') One for reading out loud, methinks.
Well done.
ATB
Alex.

Posted 13 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

i dont know my about poetry.....my writing is very simple and straightforward. i found your page because you reviewed on of my poems and gave me a really meaningful review. i think this is great. i dont know much about poetry but i enjoyed reading the words and the imagery you use. great poem :))

Posted 14 Years Ago


Some of this is difficult to follow, since you pack in so many close and eclectic images... but the drift comes through clearly... I felt it was about the struggle to find that sense and calm that brings harmony to our souls... in the midst of chaos and bedlam... You depict the tensions and the emotional edge very effectively...

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

A great showing of your inner-self.

Posted 14 Years Ago


oh, it wants to be read out loud, the beauty of your words touched me deeply

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

It is so rate to find traquility in the world
yet alone in us...moments of pure joy where we, our soul and our world around is are one...moments rare as the golden spoon you mention, yet we recognize them when they happen and savor every moment of them knowing they have a short life...like dissipating smoke...We were in Venice once in early morning...in a gondola... Sliding through the inky water (it seems so at night) we held each other...the world was silent save the water lapping against the hull of the gondola and the buildings that seemed to spring from the water...we passed the home of Marco Polo...still standing... Still inhabited...and for a few moments, the golden thread of time seemed to break and the moment was perfect tranquil...
we just sat in the silent night...the moonlight reflecting from the lacquered gunwales...we could almost hear the starlight sizzle as it hit the water to be reflected to our eyes...sitting there...my arms around the woman I love...amazing...
I love this thought-provoking piece...you writing, as always, sizzles with beautiful words and artful alliteration...the only criticism I have is that it ended too soon...

Posted 14 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

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this oozes a personal understanding of self...a deep breath of reality peppered in too..your phrasing..is interesting and the last stanza was especially good

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

This delves so deeply into the self-appreciation of tranquillity that the classic ideal interpretation of that state of calm merges in this poem from blue-water stillness and supposed simple clarity into a silent, subtle, yet obscure cloud of accepted gloom and melancholy. It's difficult to appraise such a complex and introspective prolixity of an examination of a subject without becoming inscrutably impressionistic and abstract in much the same way (as is evident from what I have already written so far..!).
That said, the spiritual and intellectual wrangling of this piece has a strong sense of soul and expression which rivets the mind to the whole question of what tranquillity really means.
Overall, in content and style it is perhaps a difficult pill to swallow; and one should take a diplomatic step back in order to fully appreciate what is being said, and to get anywhere near comprehending just what it means in relation to your own concept of the theme...
It is expressionistic to a fault, I think. A deep pool of imagery and feeling. And quite difficult to respond to clearly.

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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Added on October 30, 2010
Last Updated on October 30, 2010


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