Ch. 1 john

A Story by zzcomic

the beginning of a story about a socially inept detective

"Exscuse me sir" I felt a tug on my sleeve. looking down my gaze was met by a sober faced, brown headed little boy. this must be toni, her son. "Did my mom really kill that man?"

"Yes she did," I replied. This response caught him off guard. stepping back and with wide eyes he let out an audible gasp.

"But she told me it wasn't her!" Tears were forming in his eyes.

"Well son, that makes her a murderer and a liar."

"John can I talk to you for a second?" a deeper voice called from across the lawn.

Ignoring the man approaching us in full police uniform Toni asked me, "Why did she do it?

I thought about it for a moment "Well there seems to be no motive and she did it in cold blood," I put my hands on my knees and leaned in closer, "She probably just killed to kill. Mentally unstable. Who knows how many innocents this crazy old bi-"

"John!" a hand grabbed my arm and whipped me around. "What are you doing?" Frank, My new partner whispered harshly.

"Oh. I was merely informing my little friend here," i turned to look at Toni only to find that he had ran off. likely to rethink his roots. Hopefully he'll overcome his dark background and have a nice family with three kids and a good job. I'll bet he'll be an architectual drafter. He looked like an architectual drafter to me, though not a very good one. "That his mother is a ruthless killer and a chronic liar. Poor kid. I wonder if I should go tell him to figure out a different occupation. What do you think he should be when he grows up?"

"What?" Frank whispered. "What does that have to do with anything?" He threw his hands out in front of himself fingers extended and palms facing his face. A look of exasperation, I thought, I wonder if he's having marital problems.

After a moments silence in which my only reply was a blink he threw his hands up and said, "It doesn't even matter. What would possess you to tell a six year old child that his mother is a killer?"

"Because she is that's why."

"we don't know that. We haven't interviewed her yet. We haven't interviewed anyone. We haven't even seen the body." he looked tried.

I considered suggesting that he see a marriage counselor but instead replied, " of course we do frank it's obvious."

"What do you mean it's obvious? We just got here. The only thing thats obvious to me is that you are the worst detective of all time and I am going to talk to the captain about getting a new partner real soon like." His face was red and he looked like he was going to kill someone.

Knowing that as a police detective it is my duty to prevent homicide whenever possible I said to Frank as calmly as I could, "Now Frank," I put a hand on his shoulder which he immediately shrugged off. "I think that you should go see a marriage counselor, you know to help work out things with the Mrs." I winked at him.

His eyes enlarged and he took on a look of bewilderment, "we weren't even talking a- How did you-?" he was freaking out.

"Frank," I soothed,"go take a personal day. take Rhonda on-"

"How do you know my wife's name? We've been working together for two days now."

"go take her out for lunch. Buy her some roses. take her to the lake and serenade her till all is forgotten." I put my arm around him and began leading him towards his truck. "Don't worry about the case. I've got everything under control."

"Are you sure? I mean I don't want to leave you alone on this big case and all this wor-"

"Shh." I put my finger to my lips, "don't worry about it. go have fun with your wife and let john take care of everything." we stopped in front of his old beat up toyota. I think it's supposed to be red but it's hard to tell under all that dirt. "I'll explain everything to the captain and you can come back tomorrow stress free and with your marriage still intact."

He turned to me looking relieved, "Thanks John I owe you one." He hopped into the driver's seat and proceeded to save his marriage.

I watched him roll down the street, stop at a stop sign and then drive out of view. What a day, I thought. In the last ten minutes I solved a murder, prevented another, saved a marriage, and helped a small child narrow down his prospective occupations. I wonder if the captain considers that a full days work. If so I'm going to go home, eat some twinkies, and watch Opra solve the worlds problems. I turned to go find him, but it seems he had already found me.

"Johnny My boy, how are you doing on this fine day?" The captain is a plump man in his fifties, balding and contains a jollieness that rivales even santa.

"I'm doing just fine thanks for asking. however I do have a question for you."

"Oh. before you do, explain. was that frank I just saw drive away?" he frowned causing wrinkles to form almost to the crown of his head.

"yes it was, captain, he's taking a personal day. Marriage problems, you know." I shook my head, "He's letting his job get between him and Rhonda."

He gave me a knowing look, "Ah, I see. Well I need you to come with me and help me solve this murder problem." He turned and started walking towards the victorian style two bedroom house.

"Just ask Opra," I suggested, "She knows just about everything.

"Well that would've been my first choice, but unfortunately she's in high demand at the moment. I"ll have to settle for you."

We dodged the busy looking cops patrolling the yard and entered the house.