Know

I got all these ideas, all these thoughts in my mind..

I’m not sure how to say them,

But they invented my life.

They took over my time.

I just lay here, thinking,

“Man, I just want to die.”

& i’ll sit there and i’ll cry.

Hoping there’s more to this life.

Than exactly what i’ve seen.

Because all I know is evil, and it hurts real bad to see.

Now all I know are all the good is avoiding me.

Like I’ve got some fluorescent sign,

Hell finds its way to me.

& I’ve been scarred, burnt, and called things beyond words.

I’ve been lied to, I’ve been hurt,

It’s like some enchantment, some kind of curse.

I attract all the bad,

the good,

it never comes my way.

& now all I am seeing are the scars that remain.

Left alone in the world,

My father doesn’t recognize me.

A lost little girl,

Nobody can hear what’s inside me.

I scream so so loud inside of my head.

People have told me i need to just drop dead.

Yeah, that’s what they’ve said.

& then I scream even louder-

until my freaking ears bled.

It’s a life, i guess. I don’t like to live.

But I just have to, I guess.

I gave all I could give.