The Anti Directioner

My name is Rachel Rovers and I'm an anti-directioner. Don't shoot me. What will Rachel do when she comes face to face with the ferociously smoking duo that defines trouble, Harry and Zayn?

Lol. They were a joke. A joke in the name of mankind. They jabber. The people rejoice. Ah, beautiful.

No, come to think of it, what is the world coming to?

1D clothes, 1D brands, 1D jokes, 1D slogans, 1D quotes, 1D lyrics, 1D perfumes, 1D stickers, 1D tattoos (goes on endlessly). But you know what? Screw that.

And just when I thought my life couldn't get any worse, the  coffee shop did the unthinkable.

 They bought in cheap 1D disposable coffee cups and I was forced to drink of that. People don't throw those cups away. They take it along with them. Every Sunday, that coffee shop gets crowded by flocking teens way more any other cafeteria does and oh it's just the beginning of my everlasting tragic tale.

Point was that I was sitting in my room, with the lamps switched on, sipping my coke like a vampire on blood, and laughing like a maniac and simultaneously scrolling a FB post sent by my heartbroken friends. I was on the verge of losing my sanity. I was  way too happy to express my joys in mere words.

Oh my god, guys see this! This is so bad :(   Shennie, the nerd of our school had posted this.

While most people who have nabbed themselves tickets to the UK leg of the Where We Are tour are furiously planning their outfits and/or trying to discreetly turn themselves into Kendall Jenner in order to catch the attention of a certain curly haired chap ,others are having an actual nightmare.

Apparently some horrible opportunists took advantage of the fact that One Direction fans will buy tickets at whatever costs necessary, and it has now come out that some fans have been caught in a scam with a website posing to be a real 1D ticket seller.

According the the Daily Star, Smart Cloud Tickets were selling cut-price tickets to the UK dates of the Where We Are tour, which naturally caught the attention of loads of fans.

However, with not long left until the actual concerts, people began to worry due to their tickets still not having arrived in the post.

Pretty much confirming that the whole thing was just a scam, Smart Cloud Tickets has now pulled its phone line and website, leaving fans seriously out of pocket and without any One Direction tickets.

 

That's so freaking right, you humans. You deserve this for being the jabber fans. I laughed out loud again sipping my coke, smiling to myself.

Today felt so good.

You will not believe me. I know. No one will. I don't expect you to.  But this was the truth. Today was the auspicious day I had bothered to listen to at least one of their songs mainly to understand their hidden secrets for selling so many copies, What makes you beautiful was supposedly the name of it...along with their music video, since that was the first thing that had popped up anyway.

After those terrible minutes,  I sat up straight in complete silence.

Because you know what the million dollar question was?

How did a video and a noise like that sell five million copies?

If I video'ed my cat and dog together and added some orchestral music, would I have been a teen millionaire by now?  MY DOG SANG MUCH BETTER!

Lord, I looked up at the ceiling of my room imitating a scene from a fake drama, please give me the courage to bear the ongoing insanity's of this world. Please. I need it, and I need it a lot.

I cannot even begin to tell you my tragic tale. There was a time when 1D used to be a common topic that was discussable and squealed upon even by the two worst enemies.

It had become the drug now, and its side effects were affecting me, to a very unimaginable extent indeed.

I didn't get it. Almost all the profile pictures in my friend's list were either the Styles guy or a Zayn and most of them liked to keep it half naked. I cringed my face at the status of my best friend that said...

Zayn Malik is my religion and my sexuality.

And then there was a status update from another of my close friend.

I have a boyfriend .

His name is Niall,

But he likes to be called Liam,

My parents call him Louis,

My friends call him Harry,

But I like to call him Zayn.

OH MY GOD OH MY GOD! I squawked in terror.

I could not find a single person who did not mention himself/herself to be a hardcore directioner.

Isn't there one, just one, just one person out there who did not like 1D like me? JUST ONE? GODDAMMIT I JUST NEED ONE.

I MEAN EVERY SINGLE THING I CLICKED HAD SOMETHING TO DO WITH 1D.

It was like there was a line. Me on one side. The entire world on the other. 

I raged and googled maniacal questions like "Whats so good about 1D?" and "Why is 1D so famous?"  and 1D for dummies before shutting down my laptop in a huff.

But let me tell you why I've been hooked up with this boy band in the first place.

I used to be a normal girl. Okay, I'll cut the crap.

My life has taken a three sixty degree turn thanks to 1D. I don't enjoy my life like I used to. I was being separated off my group of friends at a slow rate, why? Just because I neither liked 1D nor their songs for that matter. I tried to like them for my hardcore 1D obsessed  friends, but I couldn't force myself to like something that I really didn't. So right now, I was trying to enjoy the seclusion that I was being faced with.

And the second reason for my explosion towards 1D.

Regretfully, I don't find the heart to tell you this. But I will, anyhow.

Our school has decided to take us to London for the overseas trip this year. You wouldn't believe the chaos our class created after this was announced because to them going to London was as good as marrying the directioners. My friends were overjoyed, over excited and over everything and were frantically getting us tickets for their upcoming concert, and I like the third wheel sat there complaining to my dog.

 

London meant cloud nine, alright.

 

The golden streaks of the evening sunlight had blazed my room and floored them in a shiny gleam of glow. The shades of nostalgia added to the serene atmosphere and channelized me to my very own depths of consciousness.The light purple color of the ceiling had intermingled and blended  with the golden color to create the perfect sequence of vividness. 

Although I was practically admiring the little texture of colors that the sunlight created, I was actually  annoyed.

I was skillful  at getting pissed off at the slightest bit of everything that happened around me. Not a very handy mentality and an acceptable attitude with the public, I know. But what of that?

This was my mom's way of waking me up from my afternoon nap. Drawing out the curtains and opening the windows wide .Therefore letting those wretched sun rays hit my fragile eyes.

I would have to get up if I wanted to draw in the curtains and return back to  sleep, so I let that be and after mulling about the trifle topic, shut my eyes in  rebel.

But as if to counter strike my intentions of returning back to dreamland, the crow perched itself on the nearest trunk of the tree and started cawing at its mightiest voice.

Just great.

My mobile buzzed in with the latest reminder of an app update and I had an ominous feeling that it too, along with the crow, wanted to join in the fray of my sleep slayers. With an eye open, I looked at the beeping mobile that lay across my pillow and cursed a significant amount of spells and jinxes.

Now that it was clear that the entire universe opposed my sleeping anymore, I gave up my futile attempts to catnap and groggily went downstairs to the washroom.

"How long were you planning to nap, Shel?" my mom's voice echoed in from the kitchen as she heard the doorknob of the bathroom click.

"I'm tired after that last minute packing, mom. I needed this." I answered out loud before shutting the door of the bathroom behind me.

God. Last minute was right. I had completely forgotten about the trip. The trip was finalized and decided two weeks ago but the date wasn't. They had  fixed the date only a week ago and I had completely forgotten about it. I was goofing around with stupid Facebook memes and such a crucial thing had slipped out of my mind...Leave it to me to do the most hilarious thing known to mankind. Tomorrow was the flight and I, somehow ,had managed to pack the essentials by today. I think these will be enough for  one week, right?

Oh

And a memory of another cursed realization.

 I had to attend that dratted concert too.

Oh that's alright. I can just say that I have got my periods or something and sneak out in between the concert and hangout at The La Corde to grab a bite. Under these circumstances, I was glad I was born a girl. Such handy excuses and you could not even prove that I was lying. I looked up at the mirror goofingly smiling to myself and realized that I had been washing my  hands for five minutes .

I turned off the tap and hurriedly made my way to my room again. I had to pack every single fab stuff I had! It was London after all!

Toothbrush check. Deo's check. Towels check. Mobile check. Uno cards check. Hair curler check. Vitamin tablets check.  Ipod check. Earphones check. Sunglasses check. Camera check. Slippers check. Lip gloss, eye liners check. Nail cutters and nail polishes check. Oreos check. Harry Potter check. To-do list check. Mayonnaise check. (goes on endlessly).

A loud voice boomed in from downstairs. I checked the time and realized that it was only my mom calling me for dinner.

Wait it's night already? Wow what?how?

I packed everything in order and reviewed all the belongings that I had taken with me. After some more last minute calculations of the things I needed, I did a victory pose to mark the end of the tiresome yet fun packing session, switched off the lights, and headed downstairs for dinner.

"It's done, Mom."  I said pulling out the chair from the dining table. My mom was sitting at the other end of the table garnishing the salad with chili ketchup and mayonnaise.

"Well, it should be done. You are leaving early morning tomorrow" she said with the usual sternness in her voice still afloat .

My mother was the sternest lady I had known. Maybe it was because of this very reason that I was not prone to the childhood phrase of "oh no that's a scary teacher."  

She had a pair of dazzling brown eyes that matched her auburn hair. Her flawless skin glowed even in the darkest shade of the night. 

I had got my dad's coal-black eyes and my mom's dark brown hair, that somehow though unmatched, suited the visual aspect quite well. I had got an appreciable height and an athletic build. My only drawback being the incorporation of the lazy genes in my cells whose origin remains a mystery.

My mother had an air of authority that could be well dwelt upon and her actions and thoughts matching every bit of her perceptions. Anyone, dead or alive,  knew Mrs. Angela Rovers was a lady never to be messed with. 

She had her own liaisons and businesses to take care of. It goes without saying that she is the one person I have loved and respected so greatly in this small length of my life.

"Yeah" I sat with a heavy thud and looked at the delicious size of the macaronis. She looked at me and immediately made a face furrowing her eyebrows, as always.

I got up with an audible sigh and  went to the basin and stood there for a couple of minutes, washing my hands. Like I would eat macaronis with my hands anyways.

Oh, on the other hand, I think I just might.

One, Two, Three, I counted in my head. If I came back before seventy seconds she would ask me to do it again.

I'm not joking, that's the kind of person my mother was. Detailed and routined, particular about every single thing with an eye of a hawk starting from washing hands to walking properly. Anyone could have mistaken her for a former descendent branching out of an aristocratic family. You could not joke with her because then you would end up reflecting about it the whole night.

I had once joked about a potato and then had vowed never to joke again.

Well, we could not do anything about that, all the members of our family are known as the peculiars for nothing. Oh and that does not, in any way, apply to me. I believe I am quite sane myself.

Because of my mother's so called majestic and dominating nature, I was brought up in a royal way, according to them. She taught me the manners , the etiquette's and every single thing you needed to distill to fit in with the high class. But like they say, a woman can be the mother of her daughter's flesh but it did not mean that she could be the mother of her spirit too. None of her teachings, none of her efforts were efficacious on me.  Her ways and endeavors to sober me up were in vain. She could not have her way with me, and that disappointed her.

 I disappointed her.

I returned to the table and began digging in without a word.

"Rachel," she pronounced my name "You did not do your prayers. In fact, you do not do it for many days."

"Well , what can I do? I'm an atheist," I spoke back mumbling through my mouth full of chewed food.

"What? You cannot! Th-" she paused and shot me her famous look of disapproval. I got the vibe that she did not consider the topic worth discussing about. 

She continued.

"There is something important I need to tell you." I saw her wiping her already clean mouth with the tissues. She fixed her eyes on me and started speaking in, what I would call, a regal voice. She would be an instant hit with the Hollywood films, I swear.

 "Shel, your tourist Visa is going to expire within eight days. It is the Visa from the time your dad had called us to London. You have delayed in telling me the date of your trip, so it has not been renewed. You are going to come back within a week, if I'm correct. Make sure that does not get delayed any further or there will be consequences.."

That did not sound like a piece of advice or anything along those lines. It sounded like a real god damn threat from my own mother. Even though I was used to her lectures, I couldn't help but scream TAPE RECORDER ALERT in my mind.

And boy, aren't we neck to neck with the Visa expiry. So a day late and I wouldn't be able to come home?

"No, Mom. Don't worry. It's just a week. They will book the return tickets as soon as we go there. Eight days so it's expiring on" I paused "tenth?"

She nodded with her mouth full. "Tenth" she confirmed.

 

"Wow, I come back on ninth. Perfect timing." I declared.

Before I knew, it was already bedtime and I excitedly anticipated the dawn of tomorrow.

I was not in a good shape after throwing up twice in the flight and not in a good shape would be an understatement. I was breathing my last.

 The teacher looked at me like I was a peculiar object and threw glances that effortlessly read are-you-for-real. Like the food was not enough, they had to bring in custards that smelled of rotten tomatoes. The mere sight of it made me want to throw up every single bit of the remains inside.

 This was the pure definition of torture. I was barely holding onto dear life.

4,750 miles. 10 hours. Must they choose a place so darn far? Can't it freaking be the nearest park? Why always cross the oceans?

We had a choice between London and Paris, that was decided the democratic way. Voting. Me and Cassie, whose obsession for 1D is a little  below the line, much to my amazement, were the only ones who had opted for Paris. Do you now understand the outcomes ,setbacks and deprivation we face due to that wretched boy band?

Buddy, this is just getting started.

I'm thankful to Lord that I was seated beside Cassie or these ten hours would have been my hours in hell.

"Feeling better now?" Cassie held my back tight with her hands and enveloped her other arm around my neck and patted me.

"Y-yeah. I'm good. We are landing, look down." She hovered over my window and glanced down.

Her eyes scintillated and opened wide, glistening in amazement like a three year old flying for the first time.

"Oh finally!" she exclaimed and tucked the air magazine swiftly into her handbag and I let out  a loud chuckle.

"Shel, look, its London.'' Tyler poked me from the back seat, intentionally taunting me since he knew how much I had wished for Paris. He had been chewing my brain for the last eight hours about jabber direction and the guarantee of the plane crashing any moment, only recently he had decided to take a nap and I was entitled to bask the temporary bliss with my barfs.  He's started again.

"I'm going to get a brain tumor and you and your rants are going to be responsible for it.'' I told him looking down at the city smoothly swim by.

Enormous skyscrapers and blue lakes etched the main squares of the city. The sun shone upon the whitened bricks of the pavements and the cars. The highways and the roads were crammed up in what seemed like endless traffics. Thick clouds made their way and the view was muzzy once again.

Good, this isn't the month of the rains.

I changed the time of my mobile (yes, I did not switch it off) that read 5 A.M. to 11 A.M.

The gap sure was huge.

I was basically mute the entire flight journey, because you could not chit-chat or make trouble for others or call the hostess just for fun when you had frequent urges to barf in their faces, now could you?

 

I cushioned and rested my back on the seat to get rid of the sick feeling. I heard the half-wit whisper something behind my seat but I ignored.

"Oh Shelly, why so grumpy?" Alex smirked and looked down at me amused, while on his way back to his seat from the wash.

I mumbled him to go away, made a face and looked away towards the city passing beneath.

"Don't light the fire." I heard Cassie lightly warn and chuckle under her breath.

The more they are enlightened of my condition, the more it becomes fun to pick on.

The annoying hostess for the umpteenth time, unable to mind her own business, hovered over us like the queen bee and repeated the monotonous dialogue to all her subjects.   

"Seat belts, please." she said, raising her eyebrows blankly staring at me because you see, I had committed the most grave error in history.

"Wait, wait I know." I retorted back, trying to get a hold of the nauseousness.

 

Cassie started helping me with those annoying seat belts that always disappear though they are attached to the seats.

Author's Note

More on http://www.wattpad.com/story/23080323-the-anti-directioner-1d-fan-hatefic-on-focus