I really loved this piece of writing. "We walked roofs in perfect imbalance".....great line! Yes, this really conjures up images for me, leading me into my emotions. "We walked by flowers and made for them a new scent".....another beautiful line....:)
And i love the ending too.....bittersweet.........
This flowed like music. I like the feel and the emotion in the words. The lines were strong and the story very good. The ending made this poem perfect and complete. This is a outstanding poem. "We were a kind. We were."
Coyote
I really loved this piece of writing. "We walked roofs in perfect imbalance".....great line! Yes, this really conjures up images for me, leading me into my emotions. "We walked by flowers and made for them a new scent".....another beautiful line....:)
And i love the ending too.....bittersweet.........
A review for a review? I guess. Thanks for your review on Light Burst. ^_^; Though this poem does not have any structure aside from the indent comprising "We were a kind." Don't get me wrong, it's genius. ^_^; Since you used were instead of are, I'm assuming something happened recently or sorta-recently that happened to you.
This actually reminds me of lyrical versions of a band known as Postal Service. I really did like it a lot. Thanks for accepting my friend request. It's nice meeting your acquaintance. ^_^; 9.7/10.
Oddly enough, I believe my favorite line is the last one: "We were." Obviously the twelve lines before it carried greater symbolism, more vivid imagery, and potent word usage, but ... if that last line was intended the way it sounded in my mind, then those two words carry as much significance as all the others preceding it.
The lines before paint such an amazing picture of cascading romance and a story of two souls intertwining together, but the last line seems to emphasize that it's no more. It's past tense and from our "once upon a time" that was "a long, long time ago" ... It's like ending a song with a chord whose last note doesn't quite resolve but still shimmers with all its beauty; it just resonates for an eternity, leaving the reader to gently land from the flight of your poem and walk away in a semi-daze.
You deliver quite a package of beauty and of power. Well done...