Short Phone call

Breaking-up is not breakeven

 

It was a cold Friday night, the storm is roaring and the thunder is shouting with his anger. Karen is relaxing, just sitting on her couch watching tv and waiting to fall asleep, when the phone suddenly rings. She reached her hand and grab the phone placed in her right ear and said “Hello?” the other line answered, sounding a man with a deep voice crying “I'm tired with my life, why does I am such a failure in my career, relationship and finances? Why living in this world is tough? Why the only woman who is keeping you alive does will suddenly switch off your connection to her. I want to end this life now.” Karen was surprised and answered, “Who are you? Why are you calling me? But don’t end your life, everything will be fine soon but be strong. Talk to her.” The strange caller just keeps on shouting. Karen was so scared she checked her caller ID but couldn’t trace his location. “I wish I heard that from you earlier.” Said on the other line. “huh? Luis?” the call was dropped on the other line. After the call her mobile phone ringed, Luis is calling again, she answered immediately and said raising up her voice, “Luis! Are you ok?” the other line answered “Luis, was found dead at the phone booth holding your new phone number 2 hours ago.”

Author's Note

It just a trial for a beginner writer. what can you say?

Reviews

[hasuminseiji]

this kind of creepy and tense.
i wish this was longer with more chapters
i see a lot of potential in the story but it could have some better grammar.
hope to see more from you :3

[hidie]

Thank you so much hasuminseiji for reading and commenting it. will take note to that! :)