Cool Waters

Narcissus, by the clear pool,

pined for love,

tormented by the

beautiful,

unattainable image

reflected in its cool waters.

 

I am quite the opposite:

filled with loathing-

but neither of us

can look away.

 

 

10 Dec, 2016

Reviews

[alifeacoustic]

I understand this feeling so well, looking into the abyss of what we are told we should need and strive to achieve, with only a withering look in reply, that somehow hypnotises us into looking for something we don't want, but curious of what it is that is there that others see and strive for.
As someone famous should have said, why bother with love when pizza exists, although that last bit I just my own observation. :)

[Zugzwang]

Indeed (That's my expression of the week). It's a bit like that mosquito bite that you just can't leave alone for me. I think everyone has their own take on it. I can't help being a bit self obsessed, like Narcissus, but I suppose there are 2 differences between us. a) The self hate thing b) I'm aware of how preposterous it all is, as you are.
Love versus pizza, eh? Yesterday I made love to a Spicy chicken enchilada. Your point is duly noted and agreed to wholeheartedly.

[Lyn Anderson]

oooh I love it when I pick up a wonderful piece of writing in the feed. Nothing more. No critique.

[Zugzwang]

None needed!
Glad you enjoyed it.
It was prompted by Gaia Octavia, we have weird competitions together.
She's awesome.
Well, thanks again,
z.

[V]

Good one. I like your choice of words, the poem itself reads interesting, leaves space to think.

[Zugzwang]

Thank you, Vanessa.
I'm glad you found it interesting and hope you had some interesting reflections.
z.

[V]

Yes I did and I had. You're welcome.

[Gaia Octavia]

I love the tone of this piece. But I have to wonder if so much honest self-reflection can come from anyone such as Narcissus. It is true that we must face ourselves, and that no matter where we go, there we always are. A truly well written (and vaguely vulnerable) piece. Very nice job.

[Zugzwang]

Thanks, Gaia.
The image of Narcissus is resonating with me at the moment. A tad odd, seeing as it never has before. I agree that Narcissus is not much of a deep thinker, quite the opposite, in fact.
I guess it's about me, and the way I go on about myself makes me quite a lot like Narcissus. The difference is that we have opposite experiences. But does that make me any less vain? I don't think so and I suppose that's what the poem is about. Thanks for the review, Gaia.
z.

[Gaia Octavia]

That internal struggle the poem alludes to is the vulnerability I saw in it. I believe all artists, all humans, are self-obsessed. It's food for self-expression and it's just how we are wired. The most important thing is what you do with all those thoughts. (Here comes a bunch of unsolicited advice) all those harsh criticisms that "we" have heard from others throughout our lives repeat within "us" in our own voice. When I am struggling I try to remember that those thoughts were never really mine. And screw letting anyone else in my head! Also, each failure, no matter how painful, is an important lesson learned so that we are wiser when it really matters. And one more thing: I was just musing (and writing) about all my vain introspection. GET OUT OF MY HEAD! ☺ Okay. Soapbox is now free.

[Zugzwang]

Yeah, that makes a lot of sense. For me, the internal struggle is where it's at, poetry wise. Even I get sick of it, but when I write, that's what comes out. When I'm happy I seldom feel the need to articulate or express it (although I sometimes do). So my poetry over represents the dark side of my psyche. But it's precisely the most difficult and painful aspects of life that I want to give voice to in the hopes of processing it. I feel that if I can articulate it I can identify and understand it. So for me it's actually a positive thing.
The internal struggle. I have so many voices talking to me it's hard to acknowledge that they're all mine....but they are. So strange to realise that it's you who is perpetuating the past. I can't fight my demons, I have to learn to find them, to face them and understand them. That's what I write about.

[Gaia Octavia]

Well I am certainly not complaining about your output. I enjoy your work ☺ Here's to using your pen to fish out those demons and to watching them flop around gasping for air as you unmask them.

[David Scott]

This is a form of self obsession indeed... We all ponder self with healthy introspection, yet the extremes seems to find us un-empowered to be effective in life.
An interesting observation.

[Zugzwang]

Indeed. Thanks for the perceptive comment.
z.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

we love ourselves, we hate ourselves....and it has much to do with how others see our reflection that water...usually if hate ourselves others love us, but we won't let them.

if we love ourselves too much, even if others do love us...we are too self absorbed to notice.

nice write.

[softlyfall]

Good thoughts to consider, Jacob. And then, if love is unavailable, unseen or selfish, can it really even be considered love at all?

[Zugzwang]

Yep, some great ideas there from both of you.
I guess that's why the parable of Narcissus has come down through the ages and still has great impact today...he was so beautiful he could have had anyone but instead spent all his time looking in the mirror! Self love at it's extreme.
But self hate is, I think, no less self absorbed....could it be a perverted form of self love?
Interesting ideas to ponder.
And, yes, the way we see ourselves colours the way others see us.
And if we are too self obsessed, can we really love another?
I think not.
I'd better put that mirror back in the drawer!!
z.

[softlyfall]

Well neither of you are getting it right!
You are beautiful and might actually see this if you tear yourself away from the mirror and the tyranny of skewed, screwed up social paradigms...
Everybody is...you, me , them, us, all beautiful simply BECAUSE we are flawed, which is exactly what endears us so much to God.
The poem itself is deep, layered with meanings. Very very good poem.

[Zugzwang]

Haha, yes I guess so!
The poem is kind of about self absorption for me, as well as self hate.
Aren't we all like this sometimes?
Anyway, I'm not so self obsessed that I can't have a good laugh at myself and I think the poem is doing a bit of that too. Let's face it, Narcissus is pretty ridiculous. Who spends hours looking at themselves? The joke is that poets like me do it all the time. I know it's dumb, but can't stop.
Sometimes you just have to throw your hands up and have a chuckle at your own ludicrousness.
Thanks for the review!
z.