Friction

Tired of

The endless grind

Of too fast spinning wheels

On unforgiving iron.

 

Showers of incandescent sparks,

By the time they hit the ground,

Are dead.

 

 

 

1 Dec, 2015

Reviews

[Gaia Octavia]

Public transportation is just the worst. Forced human interaction to and from the place where you get paid for even more forced human interaction seems like the worst oreo ever. There is just not enough milk to wash it all down before it's time to do it all over again. Or is that just me? I enjoyed this one very much. 14 lines of enjoyment packed into 7. Well done.

[Zugzwang]

Thanks, Gaia, for your perceptive review. Now I'm off to get some milk...
Z.

[Willard Wells]

Sounds like a machine shop. But also took on a little of casting shop. Very nice visual. Short verse is one of my favorites. Well done.

[Zugzwang]

Sounds like you know a lot more than me about all things industrial!
I defer to your superior knowledge.
Thanks for the comment.

[Willard Wells]

Well the casting was from me mistakenly as a young man considering that for my job. Fire and hot. Then I worked around some machine shops which your piece more reminds me of. You did so well I thougth you were expressing some feel of your job. Again, Well done.

[Zugzwang]

Well, I've used a grinder before so it was based on that!
Cheers, mate.

[Firebird]

I love the incandescent sparks! They may be dead by the time they reach the ground but their warmth and light was there for a brief moment. Keep sparking. Don't let the b******s grind you down! Lol

[Zugzwang]

Thanks, Firebird.
Well, we all have days like that, don't we?
The sparks are alive and well.
Z.

[Firebird]

:-)) yay! Mine are too

[Autumn Lyric]

This one was layered for me: the friction in life... the endless and tiring grind seemingly so unforgiving; incandescent sparks have lost their shine before they even hit the ground...loved your wording. Another excellent write.

[Zugzwang]

Thank you, LaShaye. That's what I had in mind as I wrote it...not sure what the sparks represent myself but I liked the image, so in it went!

[jacob erin-cilberto]

i envision a steam locomotive trying to stop suddenly...like how love comes like a locomotive, too fast, too powerful, too soon gone.

[Zugzwang]

That's because you're the Love Doctor, J. :)

[alifeacoustic]

Well put. I remember days without grind. Happy, carefree, long distant days. I miss them.

[Zugzwang]

Hahaha. Yar, I seem to remember something like that too! But it was a while ago!! Ah, well, you just get on with it, don't you?

[alifeacoustic]

You do. Life now is like walking through tar, tiring, messy and full of wishes it was like the old days.

[DirectTangent]

Another really good one, Z.

What I took from this is an inference to monotony, the confinement to a track, the relentless spinning of the wheels, of routine, and the wearing effect of it. The reference to the brief nature of life, sustained by occupation, but dead before hitting the ground is reinforced by the shortness of the stanza.

Surgical use of language, precise, its brevity significant.

Thank you for this.

[Zugzwang]

Thanks, Tangent. I liked it too- as writers, I think we like some poems better than others.
I think the poem's about the futility of letting your wheels spin too fast. I believe the term is American. I heard it in a movie and thought it was cool. It's stayed with me since then, and lo! It has found its way into a poem.
It is also about the grind of adopting a new position at work. Steep learning curve.

[DirectTangent]

An apt term, seems to me.
If presently you are on the left side of the learning curve, I hope the slope isn't unmanageably steep, and that things level off nicely.
Nice work, your poem. Understanding your intent in its writing adds to its comprehension, and the approach from a different interpretive angle adds an alternative dimension.

[Zugzwang]

Yar, well, I always appreciate some one explaining the thinking behind a poem, as I personally find them difficult to interpret sometimes. But I guess that's part of the beauty as well...I always find it interesting how other people see what I have written. Often their insights are much more interesting than the actual inspiration behind the poem, which can be awfully prosaic, I have to say.
Work is actually leveling off, but it's a long slow leveling off process, and I'm likely to be whinging for a good while yet!! Haha.
And I like alternative dimensions...I live in one!