MAY BEST SONG

ARCHIVE SONG

My angel clipped wings I know

Wonders in darkness on grimey ground

In a forest unclean unsound

Everything everything's gone wild

Make land for the cows to graze

Leaflets scatter around to advertise sell out

A swamp in it hands stretched out

To catch a passing dime

Donations to the rich widened

Pavements for the poor

Somewhere else to lie

But my friend the carriage door

Stands slightly ajar

And I know clipped wings make uneasy flight

But we've got to reach

A place where the feast never ends

A moment when the music celebrates

And a time when darkness belongs

To night skies and nothing else

Nothing else -No-

Tomorrow my spirit seen

Fears today my mind

Soul aches so deep

Always craves my body to reach

Reviews

[Jasmine]

This is a very interesting poem. You've developed some engaging imagery, like "Donations to the rich widened
Pavements for the poor"

My criticism is that the "angel wings" imagery doesn't link with the idea in the poem. It's a little weak, and doesn't carry any deep meaning. rather just a visual image that isn't relevant to the overall well-written poem.
Keep up the good work.