The girl looked like a happy bird She was a perfect beauty without any flaw Her manners matched with a nerd Seeing her may give a feeling of awe
She rendered a sweet melodious song She performed her task with perfection Her words danced in my heart for long I was fully amazed by her dedication
I switched to a nearby spot after the event Talking with other persons on related matter Spending with them wonderful moment I enjoyed the pleasant atmosphere
Suddenly the girl came and stopped before me She wanted to ask a simple question I was wondering what her query could be Then I gladly accorded my permission
She told me that she loved a handsome man But he never responded to her passionate call She thought about him again and again She feared that she could not stop her fall
I became very pleased with her polite gesture But failed to give her a perfect solution Human mind is like an unknown pasture That's why we have to live in delusion
This is simply amazing, Dear Poet, incredible imagery your words have captured,
Very descriptive in depicting these two characters, not to mention, the atmosphere.
Sometimes one needs to delusion themselves until they either have no choice
But to face reality, or find the strength to. Brilliantly insightful with both meter
And choice of words. It's always a pleasure to 're visit your work of art, zainul...
Pen on! 100/100
Posted 10 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
10 Years Ago
Hi Barrie,I feel very fortunate to read your wonderfully written heartfelt review.
Your review.. read moreHi Barrie,I feel very fortunate to read your wonderfully written heartfelt review.
Your review enlightened me on the causes of delusion.
Thank you dear friend for stopping by to glorify the work.
Have a nice time.:)
10 Years Ago
You're very welcome, zainul, the pleasure was all mine to read! Thank you, you as well
Namast.. read moreYou're very welcome, zainul, the pleasure was all mine to read! Thank you, you as well
Namaste :)
It rhymed and could be read at a certain tempo. Might make a nice spoken word piece, as it is clear and offers ample visual ques.
Posted 10 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
10 Years Ago
Thank you Paul for taking time to read and review the piece.
Your admiring review has inspired.. read moreThank you Paul for taking time to read and review the piece.
Your admiring review has inspired me to keep writing.
I appreciate your desire not to live in delusion.:)
We often do delude ourselves....thinking we have a chance with a particular person when in reality there is not a chance at all. The fact the girl asked you about her love life could have been a let down....you probably were hoping she would be interested in you. The imagery you used to describe her was so vivid...I could picture you watching her flit around the room. Her beauty had captured you. Good rhyming, Zainul. Lydi**
Posted 10 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
10 Years Ago
Thank you Lydia for your sagacious review.
I feel very glad that you considered all aspects of.. read moreThank you Lydia for your sagacious review.
I feel very glad that you considered all aspects of the events surrounding the piece.
Yes,her beauty captured me.
I hope she will enjoy a very happy life.:)
This is a very beautiful poem Zainul, and you speak wise words :)
Posted 10 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
10 Years Ago
I love your wonderful and admiring review,Laura.
Thank you for stopping by to grace this piece.. read moreI love your wonderful and admiring review,Laura.
Thank you for stopping by to grace this piece.
"human mind is like an unknown pasture/ that's why we have to live in delusion"
wow...love those lines...there really seem to be no perfect solutions in life...we just add it all up the best we can.
Posted 10 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
10 Years Ago
Thank you jacob for focusing on the heart of the write.
You have nicely concluded that there r.. read moreThank you jacob for focusing on the heart of the write.
You have nicely concluded that there really seem to be no perfect solutions in life...we just add it all up the best we can.
I feel very blessed by your extraordinary review.:)
I love this! especially the fact that it truly reflects on life and the ways of our minds, it is fast paced and made me want to read on, it has a solid base and is beautifully written, great job!! :)
Posted 10 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
10 Years Ago
Thank you Heather for taking time to read and review the piece.
This means a world to me.:)