Painting A New Sky

Ramblings.

Once again, I find myself

gazing emptily at the moon,

my eyes feel vacant

even to my raging mind.

Each time, I'm touched

by the beauty of it,

as it captures and

consumes me in places.

I try, unsuccessfully, to

disremember certain things

and certain people. I have

a whole wall in the back

of my head where

 

each name just hangs

limp, dangling off its hinges,

threatening to fall off any minute.

The names oddly shine

on the plaque, one in particular.

Oblivion is a gift

bestowed upon me

by the night rider. ..

Once again, I find myself

painting a new sky.

Reviews

[Einstein Noodle]

i can tell how you wrestled with this Doc. ..its fragmented direction and different take on the magic of moon glow is unsettling for me...never taken to strange disremembering places by her grace ;) have you tried putting this in poetic form instead of prose? it might help to trim and/or embellish the thing it is you are trying to get to ... i like the title and its repetition ... it helps put it all together in the sense of letting go and starting over ... beautiful empowerment in painting that new sky ... i am taking that with me today ;)
E.

[Dr. YumnaKay]

I like your suggestion of turning it into a poetic style and did rewrite it. Thank you so much for reading and appreciating, Einstein :-)

[Einstein Noodle]

it helps me to know where the poet wants lines to break and pause ... i love the names on hinges dangling .. it's a vivid emotive image for me .. i liked it the first time reading too ;) your closing strikes home to me ..when thoughts and feelings are raging and anxiety riddled ..that oblivion is sweet indeed ...out of that "no mind" calmness one can begin anew ...such a lot of good stuff in this one says i! ;)

[Dr. YumnaKay]

:D thanks again for making this lazy writer rewrite the first lousy attempt haha.

[Einstein Noodle]

[barleygirl]

This is the top poem I've read in weeks! I love this. I relate to this so much! Just this morning, I was trying to stop grinding on a communique between myself & someone who grates on my nerves. I love the way you make this down-and-dirty bad habit of mine feel kind of artful . . . like, not so much a shame, as just a mere weakness. I am entranced by the moon, I've read & written many moon poems, but this is the most original & relatable & powerful that I can recall (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Thank you so much for your lovely words here and for relating to this write, BG. I'm humbled. Hugs back :)))

[Chris Shaw]

Hello Dr Y. Your posted image has much magnetic pull, as have your lines concerning moon gazing. Wonderful to contemplate its glory. Lovely lines here.

Chris

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Thank you so much for appreciating, Christine. Glad you like it :)

[Crosby Idasa]

Painting a new sky... Hmm, when I saw that heading it got my attraction. Nice write

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Thank you so much. Glad you appreciate :-)

[Coyote Poetry]

We will need to paint a new sky often in a life.
"Once again, I find myself
painting a new sky."
I liked the complete poem. The above lines. Wonderful and thank you dear friend for sharing the amazing poetry.
Coyote

[Dr. YumnaKay]

I do agree. Thank you so much for appreciating, John :)

[Coyote Poetry]

I did enjoy and you are welcome my dear friend.

[Ardra]

It's a beautiful and haunting poem at the same time.... the name plates hanging on the board.... loved that line...
As moon child whenever I look at the moon I am in awe of her beauty.... recently the full moon was very beautiful...
Nicely captured Yumna.. :)

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Somehow, I never look at the moon as 'her' ;P And yes, full moon is always so enchanting! :D thanks so much for reading and appreciating, Ardra. :))

[emmajoy]

' I have ~ a whole wall in the back ~ of my head where ~~ each name just hangs ~ limp, dangling off its hinges, ~ threatening to fall off any minute... ..

Was difficult to focus for a few seconds after that excerpt, because to me,it seems the core of your poem. As always, your words are specific, quite firmly set down, yet you've certainly expressed emotions and perhaps - decisions in this piece. Those final nine words shout change,

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Ah Emma, you do get the essence of this piece. I did try clearing my head off some things. I just hope to stick with it this time...
Thank you so much for feeling this write amd appreciating xx

[BBP]

Okay Lady, I feel like you ripped this out of my head, only worded it so much better than I would have.
I really enjoyed this one! Wrapped up a world of emotions in one piece.

[Dr. YumnaKay]

I'm glad you relate to this one, Bev. Thank you so much for appreciating :))

[LazerRays]

Night riders eh? So the Ku Klux Klan gave you the gift of oblivion. Lmao. Jk. Couldn't resist. :P

Thumbs up.

I find it ironic that this is a poem about you being lost in your head but I love how your picture looks like she's glancing at her watch.

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Ah, I wish. ..
I like to think that the girl in the picture has a watch which tells how much time she has left on the Earth. Or a head bowed, praying... idk.
Thank you so much for reading and your thoughts, Sarah. Appreciated. x