When Metaphors Are Dead

Inspired by Jacob erin-cilberto's poem 'when format is all we have'.

When metaphors are dead 

with no songbirds in sight 

to lighten the morn' of a 

scorching October day, 

and not even the water 

trickling down the fingers 

has that desired effect.

When thoughts and emotions 

get muddled like a cat 

running wild with a half-finished

patchwork quilt.

Still, words spill themselves, 

erratic, as we stroke our egos,

euphoric, that we have penned 

something brilliant...

awaiting to be read. 

Author's Note

The last few lines are directed at self than on anyone else. Thank you for reading.

Reviews

[An owl on the moon]

Your words create such an October place, with a stillness, with a lingering warmth from summer still sliding over your tongue. One can feel the creative seed coming to life in you, the joy as each word is born into another. I always find myself awaiting the reading of more of you, dear Yumna.

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Thank you so much for appreciating this one, Craig. The feeling's mutual, my friend. x

[barleygirl]

It is my belief that all writers are steeped in the euphoria of a newly-finished piece, stroking our egos & such (excellent observations well stated). So it's not just you! *wink! wink!* I could not find Jacob's poem, but I know his style well & I can feel it in your poem, the way he is self-deprecating about his writing abilities. I love how you use metaphor so imaginatively despite your title, the ultimate in irony (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

[Dr. YumnaKay]

I think I became too self critical of my stuff after I somewhat got the hang of how to express myself better in terms of emotions but there ain't no denying that euphoric feeling still, haha.
Thank you so much for appreciating this one and the lovely words, BG. Always appreciated. Hugs back

[Einstein Noodle]

so where is the metaphor Doc??? (just kidding) your title is a well baited hook ...especially for around here ..or any poet place as far as that goes ... not surprised the wiz of metaphor, Mr. jacob has been the inspiration ... the poet searches and finds phrases, images, and struggles like half planted seeds ;) and your note on the closing, in my opinion , is not needed ... we ought to be able to smile at ourselves over the mix of muse, words and "I" ... can't tell you how many times an idea and a few words have burst upon my wandering mind ..to be jotted down in haste so as not to loose the brilliance ... the piece of paper usually travels around in me pocket for days until i "discover" it and read it ..and wonder (honestly) what i ever saw in it ;} love your poem .. one of the best, I have read, about when the ink runs dry
E.

[Dr. YumnaKay]

I definitely suck at metaphors so Jacob and the poets here are certainly an inspiration for me (that includes you too, my friend ;)) but ah, I so relate with those ideas cropping up in the mind...and when found later, I even forget why I originally wrote it down haha
Thank you so much for appreciating this one and for adding your thoughts, Einstein. Glad you like it :))

[Einstein Noodle]

its a keeper says i!

[andrew mitchell]

another gem doc, this is a joy to read too, twice now!

[Dr. YumnaKay]

That humbles me. Thank you so much, once again :D

[Paul Bell]

I think when you try to be creative it never happens.
Then one line appears and the page is full.
Then you look at it thinking. Did I do that? wow.

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Does happen with me either way, tbh, although I try to delude myself into thinking that I am a writer already. haha.
Thanks so much for your thoughts here, Paul. Appreciated :)

[Dr. YumnaKay]

*doesn't. :x

[emmajoy]

Love the way you've created a poem highlighting the use of metaphors, and, so wonderful they are. The entire post is hung with them like a frost covered tree. You really are a magickal writer, dear friend. Brava and more.. you have indeed created something brilliant. .

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Your words here made me smile. Thank you so much for appreciating, Em. x

[Kerdiwen Glass]

[[omfg yes I found you! It's nerissa (sinbulvinter), remember me?!]]

Your poetry is amazing as always. Thought provoking, beautiful, somewhat haunting.

"When thoughts and emotions
get muddled like a cat
running wild with a half-finished
patchwork quilt."
The imagery and metaphor here is wonderful.

"Still, words spill themselves,"
omg, can relate!
I love the idea of words "spilling" themselves. What a way to look at it!

Awesome.

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Oooh, Nerissa! Of course, why would I forget you :D I wondered where you went! So glad to see you back 😁 how've you been and the book? :P I can't wait to read the addition (s) if you made any ;)

Thanks so much for appreciating this one, my friend. Glad you like it x

[Kerdiwen Glass]

I disappeared months ago, a whole bunch of s**t went down... I gotta tell you about it sometime, the irony is insane. I can't get into my old account, so I made a new one.
I've been rewriting tasteless (again), and I changed a shitload of stuff since the last however many times. Which is why I'm back on here.

You're welcome! Glad to talk to you again!!

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Would love to catch up whenever you're free :-)
Haha okay, I'll be reading on anyway 😎😉

[Kerdiwen Glass]

Yeah, actually Ill PM you

[Jibey]

One of your best pieces... reflective, atmospheric, insightful. Metaphors are alive (!) - the songbirds, the water, the cat, the quilt. A pleasing spillage.

[Dr. YumnaKay]

But mainly inspired, so I can't take credit for this one on the whole :x
Thank you so much for reading and appreciating, Jibey. Glad you found it pleasing x

[Neville]

I didn't see this one coming, till it smacked me in the face.. tis a super special little poetic work in its own write dear friend and poet... however.. ya gotta thank Jacob too for providing that initial spark of inspiration aint ya now....... Neville

[Dr. YumnaKay]

I can't really thank him enough or any of the writers here who help me learn and grow. I'm always humbled by you reading my works, Neville. Thank you :)

[Neville]

it is always a pleasure & so bloomin true.. I would not leave a comment if I did not like what I found.. N

[Jon Roggie]

We are writing new myths. Takes a bit of ego. I still think it would be fun for a bunch of us to sneak into one of jacob"s classes!

[Dr. YumnaKay]

A bit of an ego ain't bad, unless it gets our head swollen. lol.
Absolutely! I'd love to be in one of his classes! :D
Thank you so much for your words here, Jon. Always appreciated.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

i can't fathom the thought of metaphors being dead....there would have to be a resurrection ....
we can't live without them...and poets would be so lost.
I really like this one...i am already giving blood at the poets' word bank so that we can save as many as possible.
j.

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Aye, aye. I keep pondering over your and many other writers here for inspiration. I know I'd be lost without reading into what's before me.
Thank you so much for liking this one and for the inspiration, Jacob.