On Giving Constructive Reviews

A rant mainly.

Giving out reviews is never easy. Especially if you mean it in a good, constructive way. 

During my time here in the cafe, I've always tried to give honest opinions regarding writes although I've been guilty too of reciprocating the ones who reviewed me in the past. 

Here's what I don't understand. When you leave a review commenting on a writer's lack of grammar/feel of the write, etc while also pointing out the positive aspects of that piece, they thank you. Then they ask you to point out the errors. When you do so, they end up offended somehow because 10 other reviewers did not see those obvious errors. 

The hilarious thing comes when you get a friend request from them after that and a private message offering thanks for the effort you made on pointing out their mistakes. Afterall, they want to make their poetry more poetic. (keep in mind that I asked them not to follow the edits if they didn't want to). After thanking you immensely, you get unfriended and when you check to see the edits--ta-da--the piece you pointed out the mistakes on is deleted. 

The above scenario was what happened with me recently by a writer here. It makes me question where do new writers here stand in improving their writing skills (that is, if they really want to improve it), and where reviewers like me stand when we're kept being treated this way by immature writers on a platform like WritersCafe. Not meaning to offend anyone by this but my advice to the newbies - keep an open mind while posting a piece and especially if you specifically ask someone to review it or they take the time to review it for you. Keep in mind and observe the tone of the reviewer to judge whether they're genuine or trollish or simply the reciprocating ones. That's easy enough to notice. 

Not meaning to brag either, but my time here in the cafe in the past 1 1/2 years is what gave me the courage to be open about things and improve myself as a writer which is what the constructive reviews are for. 

Thank you for reading. 

Author's Note

Just my personal opinion and an opening for discussion. I'm not in the least bit offended or bothered by what happened but just wanted to put it out there. I'd love to hear differing opinions. And of course, I'll continue giving reviews the way I usually do :D

Reviews

[Chris Shaw]

I don't give detailed and constructive feedback about structure etc unless I know that person well. Over years I have found that writers can get very upset about their precious lines. I prefer to give feedback on how a poem gets to me on an emotional level. If someone wants more specific help, then they can ask for it.

Chris

[Dr. YumnaKay]

I realized that too during my time here and for a while stopped giving reviews but it's hard to ignore when someone asks you on a pm. Other than that, yes, that is how I approach a piece of writing mainly too.
Thank you for your thoughts here, Christine. Appreciated.

[Chris Shaw]

I am new here, two months only. As I get to know people better, I may change my stance.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

I tend to feel similar to Chris in what she said. I react more to how the pieces affect me, and what I see in them. As for grammar and edits, if a piece is really rough I will suggest to the writer to edit but will not point out particular mistakes---not to belabor the point. But when someone catches a typo in one of my pieces, I am really grateful. I do not want it out there with errors.
And as Lavi so aptly put it, if a piece is posted and the writer says "ignore grammar and spelling" I won't even read it. Words are what we as poets and story writers live for and total misuse and reckless abandon when it comes to grammar and spelling is disrespectful to the genre. At least in my eyes it is.
Constructive criticism is good and many here do that really well---they are helpful but at the same time refrain from being totally discouraging.
Poetry is often so personal and so necessary for us to write---there has to be an allowance for that also, and yet if we really want to get better, we must take valid suggestions into consideration.

j.

[Dr. YumnaKay]

I share the same thoughts as yours when it comes to grammar.
I think it's all about keeping an open mind when one posts on a public forum.
Thank you so much for your insight here, Jacob. Appreciated.

[Ariana Omnomnom]

I find I rarely get reviews anymore, good or bad. I miss getting reviews because I miss hearing about how my writing evoked emotions out of others. I've been writing a long time and I know grammatically and structurally my writing is complete garbage but I don't write it to fit a science-like "proper" mold, I write it as an extension of my life, experiences, thoughts, and feelings. I write as an artist. And I miss knowing how people feel about my poetry. I remember when I was 16 I was really discouraged by a man who had a published book about poetry and his writing group because all they did was nitpick on my mismatched syllables and rhyming patterns. They didn't read it for what it was, which was an intimate look into my life. It made me feel like I never wanted to write again. But after the group meeting was over one member who often sat across from me who had written a short story about a cowboy in space told me my writing had a lot of potential and was really charged with emotion. That meant a lot to me because I might have stopped writing had he not said it. These days I can take the harsh critiquing of the technical details because I understand why I write and I just brush it off because I don't write to get better a writing, I write to have a better understanding of myself. I post so I can find people who understand me also, but since nobody reviews my work anymore I'm reluctantly transferring everything to Wattpad. I'm going to miss this site because this is where I started. I think if someone had cared to protect this site and maybe make it mobile friendly it have more activity.

[Dr. YumnaKay]

I think to be a writer, one has to be thick skinned. You don't always get people who can relate to your pieces emotionally and it's just the way it is. I realize writing is a cathartic thing for many (for me too in many ways). Regarding the not getting reviews part, however much I dislike it, reciprocation is the key. You have make the decision if you really want reviews on yoyr pieces, then maybe explore other like minded writers around here and see if they reciprocate, although I'd suggest doing so in a genuine way and not only because you want people to leave reviews on your writings. I decided lately that I don't care much about reviews but I always seek new and old writers whose works I like here. WC is the site where I started to write too so I do have an emotional attachment to it.
I'm sorry regarding your experiences here though. Wish you all the best in your future writing endeavours.
Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts here. Appreciated.

[Relic]

Unfortunately, there aren't many new writers who want advice on how to improve their writing. They only want praise. As many here may know, I corrected many and got the cold shoulder or blocked. I even had a group against me one time over it. I don't take this site seriously anymore and I don't review as much as a result.

I can't tell you how many times have I given a good review to a writer only to receive no reply from them. This leads me to believe they're only here to see if the poem is good enough for another site. This site has changed so much.

Just a note, not a critique...there are sentences in this that could be improved. :)
See, now you know why I got blocked. hahaha

[Dr. YumnaKay]

We could have gotten along well if I had joined earlier, Tim. Haha :P
I agree, there aren't many who want to be corrected. I think the unnecessary high praise they get is what gets to them.
I agree, this site has changed too much. :/
:D at least you get blocked for that, I've been blocked for funnier reasons like accused of being a lesbian. Lool
I apppreciate you telling me about the sentences, I wrote it without much edit and every time someone reviews it I spot an error myself and been correcting it as I go ;)
Thank you for your thoughts here, Tim. Always appreciate yoyr reviews. :)

[Dr. YumnaKay]

*your 😷😷😷

[Relic]

You're welcome. :) And no, I don't think you're a lesbian. :)

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Lmaoo thank Godd!! 😁😂

[Relic]

Although that's not to say lesbians wouldn't like you. lol :)

[Dr. YumnaKay]

That would be quite out of the scope of this public comment but I'm not gonna contradict ya 😉😛

[Relic]

hahahahaha

[Delmar Cooper]

The most sincere and utterly negative review I can make of a piece of writing is to not finish it, never comment about it, and promptly forget I read a portion of it. The views in relation to comments may tell a mathematically inclined writer something, but I doubt it.

[Relic]

Your Take on views has just described not only me but half the people on here. haha No wonder many are leaving. :)

[Dr. YumnaKay]

That's one way of viewing it, yes. I think the mathematically inclined maybe misled by the excessive amount of views and reviews on a completely substandard write (not trying to appear arrogant here) just because they left numerous reviews on others' pieces for reciprocation because after all that's how it works. :x
Thank you so much for your viewpoint here, Delmar. Appreciated.

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Even I've thought about leaving but I simply can't for I love this platform anyhow and this being the place I started to write. ..

[Lyn Anderson]

What is telling i think is ratio of views to reviews. I personally would sooner have a piece viewed by 10 people who all felt the need to review it because it meant something to them, than a poem viewed by 1500 and reviewed by 25

[Gypsy Warrior Queen]

I totally understand where you are coming from as do most I believe. I am horrible at polished reviews as I usually say how I feel about a poem more so than the structure. I am such an untrained writer. I actually like when people help me out with spelling and grammatical error and if i have not purposely written that way correct it. I always get asked why I have a mature rating on my poems. I have realized it tends to keep alot of people away. I dont get as many "crazies" as I call them anymore. I also dont have a bunch of 14yr olds saying they totally get my life and emotion.The only ones now and thank goodness very few are the spam trolls. Im babbling now so will close but we are all glad your here and review to makes us better not just fluff up our egos ...we thank you!

[Dr. YumnaKay]

I wouldn't call your reviewing to be horrrible. The way I view it, if you're honest about how you feel about a poem or how it made you feel than that's okay too. One doesn't always have to comment on the structure (just my humble opinion). I don't call myself a trained writer or reviewer either but I think we're all here to learn and grow from each other.
Thank you too for sharing your thoughts here and for reviewing my pieces genuinely. I do appreciate your time very much. x

[Crowley]

Good points all around. The reciprocating thing is fine because it’s the way things are supposed to work. Everyone wants reviews new and old alike. I will make grammar and punctuation remarks if asked or point out structural problems but never ideological or subject matter. Mostly I read, try to identify and understand, and support. Support is the key, not to cut the legs out before they even get started.

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Support is the key alright but I guess some don't get that support does not only come in the gushing reviews. It's the writer's capability to understand where a reviewer is coming from. I agree about the subject matter, again, it's the writer who decides what they should be writing about unless it's offending in some way. I agree too regarding reciprocation but reciprocation with honesty is what I go for rather than taking it as an obligation to get more reviews :x
Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts here, Crowley. I appreciate.

[barleygirl]

When I reviewed 2-1/2 years ago, first getting to know this community, I found that if I gave anything resembling a correction, I would be hit with defensiveness or something similarly uncomfortable. So then I tended to only write good stuff, but I would not review those who really needed corrections. If a writer does not like anything but patsy comments, then all the honest reviewers will back away & they’ll get only patsy reviews. After that I got trolls making disgusting remarks becuz I only write good things. During this time, I felt shaken by this: “you can’t win for losing!” (an old saying here, meaning it’s hopeless). But nowadays, I have my reviewing routine down pat & I do my reviewing like a machine. I’m too forgetful to hold a grudge or to remember who said what blah, blah, blah. I don’t care & it doesn’t take any energy to deal with those who are not in sync with my style of reviewing! Everyone ends up figuring out a workable solution or stopping reviewing or leaving (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

[Dr. YumnaKay]

I'll admit, I started timidly when I first joined WC in terms of both writing and reviewing but the sweet trolls here (lol) made me almost a bull at least in terms of reviewing. And I learned from reviewers like you here - being honest about a piece of writing is better than gushing over it. I don't care if my stuff gets reviewed or not and I don't send out RRs or ask anyone to review specifically but that kind of attitude by others' raises my eyebrows (in a manner of speaking). Wish I had your memory to forget though, would be handy around here...! But I don't hold a grudge, there's already too much in life than to hold grudges imo ;)
I like your thoughts here. They're in sync with the conclusion I came to. Thank you so much for sharing your insight here, BG. Hugs back. :)

[Jon Roggie]

I like this. I have noticed various reviewers trashing new writers. They make comments which are not even close to being helpful. They often seem like attempts to garner attention. You bring the other side to the light. Everyone writes in their own manner. If someone mentions a grammatical error, or odd choice of words, explain what you were trying to achieve. Each side needs to talk. As far as read requests, I think I am around 1400 behind. There is no way I can read, and comment on each request if I want to write something myself. I don't mind the friend requests. They add different works to my feed.
This is how I started reading your words!

[Dr. YumnaKay]

I have noticed that too, I think that really breaks a new writer's bone. I agree about that and always try to end my reviews positively, it's just funny when you get pmed to ask for your opinion and then them being offended. I mean, what's the point?...
My, 1400 RRs?! There's always the option of deleting those. Js :P
You do have a point regarding friend requests but I find I don't have to 'befriend' anyone to review them ;)
Thank you so much for your thoughts here, Jon. I appreciate.

[Jon Roggie]

You have to realize I am lazy. I come here to write.
What I see teaches me.