Affliction

In Collaboration with Mr. Writer (Shaan)

Affliction

I often ask myself why I'm like this...

why can I not look normal?

Why can't I be treated the same way as others?

Every time I go out, I feel eyes peering right at me.

I hear people say stuff about me;

that I was burnt alive and somehow survived...

but that is nowhere near the truth.

I have a syndrome, which causes all these problems.

These scars, however I want to forget,

brought anew with the 'normal people's' piercing looks.

And I'm forced to bow my head and walk in silence.

Every time I go out, my ears ring with insulting comments.

I look back at my parents and see 

the helplessness in their eyes; just unbearable.

Even they can't just do anything about it 'cause

it's inevitable the way I'm treated because of what I have.

And are these problems the only thing people will discuss about me?

Not about the times when I made a human-like smile?

Or when someone didn't clean their hand

with their shirt after shaking mine?

Will I have to always endure these taunting, stinging remarks?

Don't they see the tears just around the corners of my eyes

ready to flow, but I wish I was strong,

and didn't let the harsh words get to me.

With every single passing moment I'm forced 

to acknowledge how useless I am.

That I really am just an unworthy sight, not to be seen;

wishing that I was never born this way...

Will this depression and loneliness go on forever? 

Will this syndrome cost me my life? 

Well, I hope it does... 'cause, other than my family, 

no one will give a f*** about me...

Author's Note

About Nager syndrome which affects the development of face, hands and arms...

Reviews

[emmajoy]

Why does the average human being appreciate the outside cover more than the meaning within it? Strange how intelligent people fail to realise that the outer skin fades, often distorts, with age or, in this case, into the cruelty of a disease or a myriad of other loathsome effects.

Your collaboration is first class, rarely a jarring touch.. more a melting mix of deeply felt like minded emotions. More than generous in both content and writing.

[Dr. YumnaKay]

I feel the same. Perhaps people think more superficially than they should...
thank you for your kind words here, dear Emma. As always, appreciated.

[B]

I say a good porption of depressed people are sad because of those ugly looks and comments. Coming from people that truly just hate themselves and are projecting that feeling to anyone weak enough for them to ride that wave. Surviving trouble is an honorable thing that should be glorified by our society. It is given all its due value in some western countries where people see you in weakness and give you tons of love and are truly in love with your strength. Very well done.... just say no to those social bullies that celebrate other people's grief ..... that is a sign of unintelligence ..... very well done

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Thank you for your thoughtful words here and for liking this collab. Truly appreciate it 😊

[jacob erin-cilberto]

this is so sad...people are so afraid of what they can't understand---and different can cause such an unnecessary barrier...
so powerfully expressed here, you two.
j.

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Thank you, Jacob. You summed this nicely.

[Tony Jordan]

I watched a documentary recently about a travelling circus of freaks (their words, not mines), which were basically various individuals who had medical conditions such as the one you both highlight here.
People paid to look. Has anything changed?
I think it has gotten worse.
This is deeply affecting writing guys.

[Dr. YumnaKay]

I actually read a novel about the way these people are treated... You're right, I think it has gotten worse..
Thank you, Tony, for appreciating this collab. Means a lot.

[Mr.Writer]

Thank you Tony! :D

[Kesha]

Wow! This was an awesome read, I'm always a huge fan of writing about specific syndromes that people suffer from, as you know (My OCD & alzheimers pieces), this was a wonderful write Yumna & Mr .Writer! Nicely done you 2 😊

[Dr. YumnaKay]

I think this is the first time of trying my hand in writing on a serious topic and I'm glad Shaan came up with the idea. 😊
Thank you for appreciating this collab, Kesha. Means a lot 😊😊

[Mr.Writer]

Thank you Kesha! :)

[Kesha]

You two are very welcome!! :)

[Surya]

Just for days I would say, be happy, smile always...and you will see lightening heart of happiness within...
I loved it Yumna..

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Ahh, Surya it's actually about a syndrome (collection of multiple disorders) we wrote about.. It's not about personal feelings...
Thank you for liking this collaborative effort :)

[Surya]

Yeah, you mentioned it, and I gave my words regarding those affected ones....any how, that was beautiful...

[Glen Weimann]

Yumna this is very powerful. As someone else said, thanks for naming this. There ARE folk who appear to overcome all manner of difficulties and lead lives which are productive. But goodness how hard it must be.

If I may, I'll make a couple of writing comments - well, one specific and one general thought.

The specific is in the parents stanza, where 'just can't' would read better than can't just.

The general thought - on one level it doesn't matter a jot - but is what you have written 'poetry'? It's good and powerful regardless of what we call it. It's something I intend to read around a little more - what is a 'poem'. But as I say, it doesn't change the strength and disturbing power of what you've given us. Good job! Nigel

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Indeed there are and we just seem to ignore it too often...
Regarding your specific suggestion, I'll look into it although I think it's fine either way..
Hmm, poetry is what we intended this to be. This could be free verse or just simple prose poem...

Thank you for sharing your thoughts and for liking this collaborative effort, Nigel. I appreciate it 😊

[JayDee]

DEEP.... Damn...
Thank you for sharing Yumna

However... if this is truly how you are feeling.. please do not let it eat you. Fight it. Its not easy I know, but try... harder.

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Oh no, JayDee, it's about a specific syndrome me and Mr. Writer wrote about and certainly not about me..
Thank you for reading and liking this collab.

[JayDee]

Ahhh lovely. Hehehe even better. Really nicely done.
Thank you

[Island Hippy]

Aloha, a very powerful offering of words highlighting a condition I had not known before reading this. "Normal" is such an affliction that it casts us all into categories. You have thrown light on the attitudes of the masses and the learned behaviours we inherit "just because" it is an old saying but beauty truely is only skin deep, the many opportunities to be educated/enlightened by such are ample and the real gifts are understanding, grace, humility and gratitude .... all the things unseen all the things that form character for the onlookers! The realizations highlighted are so sad if only one could come to a deeper realization they have more to offer than what they can see right now. Mahalo to each of you. Izzy

[Dr. YumnaKay]

I agree with everything you say. I think we judge people more by how they look than by what lies inside..
Thank you for your thoughts and for liking this collab, Izzy. Truly appreciate it 😊

[Island Hippy]

You're welcome