Heaven on Earth

Free Verse...

                           

Heaven on Earth

All attempts at saving my heart

 from the inevitable failed.

And I fell headfirst 

into the pool of your charms.

You wove a spell, 

surrounded me with your words

and I, helpless

at the magic that was cast...

beckoning me into 

the warmth of your touch,

which makes my heart aflutter,

leaving me restless

and wildly so, 

as I await your next touch 

and the traces 

it leaves on my slightly moist skin, 

anticipating

as to the wonders we have 

yet to discover...

I delve deeper, 

not knowing 

where it would lead us,

and with the belief only 

that it will be okay as long as 

we're together...

I smile as our hands intertwine

and it feels already like

Heaven on Earth...

Author's Note

Just words...

Reviews

[William Liston]

Absolutely beautiful. This is one of those rare pieces that successfully captures a moment's beauty in its essence, and pulls the reader into every detail. I envisioned this like an emotional scene in a movie, with both the action and feeling prevalent throughout. Great job at creating that effect.

A minor quibble: The line "which makes my heart aflutter" took me out of the moment for some reason. Not sure why. Suggestion: making my heart aflutter.

- William Liston

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Thank you for appreciating, William. I'm glad that effect carried out well.
As for your suggestion, I think you're right. I'll look into it :)

[Kesha]

Ooooo a very sweet (& cheesy) write! ;) I thought this flowed wonderfully and provoked such beautiful images! :)

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Oh lol I'm still waiting for your 'cheesy' one 😉😂
Thank you, Kesha! I'm glad you liked it 😊😊

[Kesha]

You're welcome & thanks for reminding me lol I completely forgot! I will work on it tomorrow morning 😁

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Cool! 😉😊

[Jibey]

Words... and dreamy thoughts.. flowing naturally from your heart. You have created a beautiful idyll... love's delight.

[Dr. YumnaKay]

I didn't think while writing this 😛
Thank you for the appreciation, Jibey 😊😊

[Surya]

It's truly heaven, if that is so....
That's romantic...I liked it...:)

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Yes, it does feel like it..
Thank you, Surya. Glad you liked it 😊