A Night of Broken Sleep

A Night of Broken Sleep

Longer nights, shorter days,

wishes of dreamless sleeps. 

Thoughts of you kept creeping in

until I heard the cuckoo's cry.

It was to be ~ a night of broken sleep

​.​

Ragged breaths; stolen moments,

your mesmerizing eyes; penetrating, 

swallows me whole, consuming

a mass, filling the void I was floating in.

It was to be ~ a night of broken sleep.

Hurricane of love; wrecking hearts,

missed beats while grazing your face.

My hand itching to smooth the creases 

etched on your frowning face; amidst all,

it was to be ~ a night of broken sleep.

Reviews

[William Liston]

Oh my ... First of all, this poem has one of the most enthralling visual presentations I've ever seen. I've read many pieces with a beautiful picture and beautiful typography to match, but I find this one especially pleasing ... perhaps it's the variance of the colors.
As for the poem itself, I found it just as captivating as the visual. I loved the repetition and how it hit at the end of each stanza. I also loved the subtle contrast among the stanzas and how they worked to convey a similar theme. The final stanza had to be my favorite though, because I liked the mix of love, comfort, and sorrow interwoven within.

This piece reminds me of a quote by Rumi:

“When I am with you, we stay up all night.
When you're not here, I can't go to sleep.
Praise God for those two insomnias!
And the difference between them.”

- William Liston

[Dr. YumnaKay]

I wasn't aware of that quote, so thank you for sharing that here. And thank you for appreciating this piece too. The last stanza is close to me as well 😊
I'm glad you liked it 😊

[duff]

As an insomniac i usually cant find a reason to be awake that's permissible but to find that someone who can steal your thoughts is someone special. Great execution and nicely done:)

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Ahh I am insomniac too 😶
Thank you for your thoughts on this one and for liking. Truly appreciate it 😊

[duff]

Ya, I can say it's honestly no fun, lol. Great job and you're very welcome:)

[barleygirl]

Sorry I haven't been on this website for awhile . . . I've missed your excellent poetry! This is a great write! I love the broken phrasing of the observations & descriptions, which illustrate the way sleep can be broken & coming in jagged pieces mixed with various disturbing feelings like intense longing & regret. I also like the repeated last line of every stanza, which is simple & direct, in contrast to the strife expressed thru-out.

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Hello, BG! I'm so glad you're back around here! I missed your presence!
Thank you for liking this one and the lovely review. Means a lot to me 😊

[Poetic License]

Amazing eloquence. Such beauty in your words.

"Ragged breaths; stolen moments,
your mesmerizing eyes; penetrating,
swallows me whole, consuming
a mass, filling the void I was floating in."

This just set my heart fluttering. So much said without being spoken. Most artful. I absolutely love this work. This one is going to my favorites. Well done.

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Thank you for your kind words. Truly appreciate it :)

[emmajoy]

Ragged breaths; stolen moments,
your mesmerizing eyes; penetrating,
swallows me whole, consuming
a mass, filling the void I was floating in.
It was to be a night of broken sleep.

What a dramatic, emotional and passionate poem, especially the one i quote.

Your visual attracts, your words display so much talent, Yumna.

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Thank you for your kind words, Emma. I appreciate it.

[Najam Us Saher]

Very rhythmic and nicely written. I truly liked this it was rich in words and meaning.

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Thank you, Najam. Glad you liked it :))

[Najam Us Saher]

You're welcome ☺

[Island Hippy]

Aloha YumnaKay, a lovely read very flowing and delicate. I like the title, what a wonderful reason for broken sleep. Izzy

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Ahh I wouldn't call it wonderful at this time of night seeing as it's 3am here lol but I see your point 😉😊
Thank you, Izzy. Glad you liked it. 😊

[Island Hippy]

Oh :) I see, I guess it better than a snoring husband.

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Hahahah yeah probably 😛😂

[Mr.Writer]

Sooo... different. I dont know... I have no words to describe the feeling I got after reading this beautiful poem... I felt delighted, scared, and at peace... To me, this was an adventure, while reading this, and the repetition was well placed and amazing!
Keep it up!

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Scared? Haha okay 😛😛
Thank you, Shaan. I'm glad you liked it 😊

[Mr.Writer]

Lol xD I actually felt heavy, or scared... I don't know what it was... lol
No problem!

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Ermmm okay 😛😛

[Michael S]

Crazily beautiful writing, YumnaKay. Very romantic poem.
You have surely grown as a writer. Keep up your great writing.

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Thank you for appreciating, Michael. Glad you liked it. Means a lot to me 😊

[James]

Great poem. There is no better reason totoss and turn all night.

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Thank you. Glad you liked it 😊

[Coyote Poetry]

When the night is long and the memories of things loss dance in our head. Hard to know sleep.
"Hurricane of love; wrecking hearts,
missed beats while grazing your face."
The above lines are true. Those hurricanes of love and life. Leave us wishing to be in a better place. Thank you dear Poet for sharing the outstanding poetry.
Coyote

[Dr. YumnaKay]

thank you, Coyote. I agree. It is hard sometimes..
I'm glad you liked it :)

[Coyote Poetry]

I did enjoy and you are welcome my friend.