Dark Soul

Your voice, 

 

was once 

my only 

salvation 

 

it carried 

a depth, 

a meaning, 

 

which none 

appeared to 

fathom 

Your eyes, 

were once 

the window 

to my soul, 

 

the view is 

blurred now, 

 

or maybe you're 

too far 

to notice, 

 

a soulless 

life here 

 

Your hands, 

 

I've forgotten 

their touch, 

 

the way 

they made me 

 

feel 

on fire, 

 

it has gone amiss 

 

My soul, 

it's darker 

than before 

 

I closed it 

shut 

 

not to be 

opened, 

at least, 

not for you

Reviews

[Michael S]

Ah..this is one sad yet sweet piece. Thought and content both are beautifully described here. Sometimes few events and experiences change our perception regarding few things in life...love too has the same impact..don't let the soul get darken by it. I know this is very easy to say but we need to survive. I hope this poem is not what you feel because if it is then this is really painful to read.
Nicely written:-)

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Well, it is close to what I felt at the time of writing.. But human emotions never remain the same.. Always keep changing..
I'm glad you liked the darkness in this one! Thank you for your thoughts here! Truly appreciate it ☺

[Coyote Poetry]

Honest journey in words and thoughts. Sweetness can turn bitter when heart is abused. Thank you for sharing the amazing poetry.
Coyote

[Dr. YumnaKay]

I agree, yes! Thank you for liking this one! I appreciate it ☺

[Coyote Poetry]

I did and you are welcome.

[Tony Jordan]

YumnaKay - this is not my cup of tea but that's neither here nor there. It is affecting. So you have made the reader feel.
I did think these two lines were the weakest part;
"aroused
that has gone amiss"
I think the previous line 'feel on fire' makes 'aroused' redundant.
Then the '...gone amiss..' line would be stronger with 'I miss that.'

All in all a great wee piece my friend.
:))

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Thank you for the honest review Tony! I appreciate that..
As for the writing, I agree it's my weakest so far 😛 but I write to give that itching hands of mine to do something 😉
I feel as if I've reached the breaking point for poems might as well stray towards more serious writing 😊
And you know better than to cheer me up with words like 'great wee piece' lol 😂
I know a bad work when I see it 😉
Thank you for your time here though and the sincerity with which you pointed out the errors ☺

[Tony Jordan]

Don't throw the baby out with the bath water Yumna.
It is a good write - the things I pointed out were the 'weak-est' - don't tar the whole thing with the same brush!
I'm not being ...thingy...hold on the term...it'll come to me...no not pedantic...the other things...hmmm...stupid memory...aha condescending, that's it.

Keep her lit YumnaKay. !!

[Dr. YumnaKay]

That's sweet of you! Still I'm my greatest critic 😉
Btw you don't have to understand everything I write 😂
Sorry this is me being cheeky 😉😛

[Tony Jordan]

Haha - you thinkI understand any of the poetry on WC? Yayy - I have succeeded in fooling them all - muwahahaaha

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Hahah that's too bad 😛

[Lovecraft]

I enjoyed the poem and the title really grabbed my attention but the extremely short lines threw me off at first.

Once I read it again though it had a better impact, with the concept of the Love in this poem seeming to flow at a delightfully brisk pace.

Keep it up, Kay! :0

[Dr. YumnaKay]

The title was inspired by your pieces because I remembered I told you about your poetry being a bit dark.. 😉
I'm glad you found the impact of it.. Truly appreciate your words ☺

[Lovecraft]

I feel proud that I've inspired you. ;P
Embrace your darkness, whatever shade it may be.

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Yes indeed dark is good 😉
And the pleasure was mine! I've been struggling a lot with titles lately 😛

[mercy party]

there was for sure some nice rhymes here, in particular "notice and soulless" was seriously butter.
I like how you resolved it with a strong stance for the end. Very nice!

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Hey thank you! I didn't mean it to rhyme though.. I'm glad you liked this one :)