Expectations

I learned a lot from this year.. And yet I didn't.. It's a harsh reality that though you gain experience in every passing year, still you don't really learn.. You just find new ways to make the same mistakes again.. And you NEVER learn..

It seems weird to me when people talk about hearts being broken, maybe 'cause I've never experienced any.. Betrayals, yes, but no heartbreaks.. I've always been the one giving heartbreaks.. Breaking trusts and losing sincere friends.. And yet I never learn..

Some people may deem me as cold-blooded to the most, maybe I am, especially when it comes to sympathies.. I find it hard to sympathize with people.. Yes, I do relate sometimes and that's when I can actually feel their pain but no more than that..

 

So, entering this new year I wish it turns out normal or rather better than the last.. Will it be? This is a question for which I'll have to wait another year..

Reviews

[William Liston]

I can relate to the feelings you've expressed in this. I've done a lot of self reflecting this year, and I've almost reached the same conclusion that you have: You never learn. I often view life as the repetition of mistakes and failures ... even when you do learn from them, you find ways to make new ones, so it's like never learning anything in the first place. I guess that's the way it's supposed to be in that no one is going to be perfect. I must note that I often reflect on the past with negativity, even though my life is mostly fine, so my view on this is a little biased.

Thank you for sharing your thoughts on the New Year as well as your self reflections. They were thought provoking. I enjoyed reading them.

- William Liston

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Thank you, William for your insight here! Always appreciated ☺

[alan peter kelly]

No. It won’t. It never does. Biologically. Psychologically, Sociologically...I expect nothing except from myself and for myself...I feel empathy and sadness for others...my self is a straight shooting arrow that needs no assistace nor belligerent, half baked human intervention regarding how best to hit a target...my future is sealed...I knew my destiny as soon as i realised that every body dies...intelligence in a World near filled with frothing stupidity is the only real curse of any truly sentient being.

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Ah, this was written more than a year ago, and reading it now, I realize how much my experiences vary from what I wrote here.
I guess it does change, but for better or worse, that we can not be sure of..or at least I can't be.
Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts and for reading through my write, alan. Appreciated. :)

[barleygirl]

I like the way you are being so honest about yourself & your feelings & your sense of responsibility for the way things go awry. I always used to feel that I was the one to spoil most of my relationships. But now I see it all very differently. I hope that someday you will also understand these things differently in your own life, too!

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Thank you for the kind words, BG! Hopefully I will..
Truly appreciate it :)

[...]

I'm a serial mistake repeater....I've learned that I am just wired for certain things, however self aware I am.
I reflect often on my life but do so with a pinch of grace, not all lessons are pleasant and often expose to us some truth. Really thoughtfully penned my friend. I enjoyed reading this. Starz x

[Dr. YumnaKay]

"Serial mistake repeater"? Lol.. Better that than being a " serial killer" 😂
On a serious note, yes, harsh truths which are too much to take in...
Thank you for your thoughts here, Starzy! Really appreciate it ☺

[Ashish]

Wish u a very very happy new year Yumna :)

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Happy New year to you too, Ashish ☺

[Jibey]

It's hard to change the way we're wired - and yet we do learn... even in the self-awareness that makes us conscious of our own weaknesses and faults. I think I have learnt over time to choose my friends more carefully, to learn to be independent... yet appreciative of those who come close and share their hopes and fears with me, or to bring emotional and physical comfort, or to stimulate my mind by their own perspectives on the world around us.

It's a truism: 'We can't change the past but we can make a difference to the future'.

[Dr. YumnaKay]

I have come to rely more upon that serenity prayer..
Thank you for your insight here.. It means alot to me ☺

[Tony Jordan]

I agree that we seem to have a penchant for repeating our mistakes Yumna.
One school of thought is that we are hard-wired as such (genomes??) but I think change comes when we truly want it to come.
When things are merely (take that with a pinch of salt) uncomfortable - perhaps devastating (for a few days/weeks) to begin with but then bearable we can quickly forget the lesson. We can 'override' some lessons for our own gratification - telling ourselves lies that somehow this time...it will be different.
Many on here have spoken of such expectations as a sign of/symptom of insanity.
Have you been checked out for insanity ?? ...kidding...

The world has a funny way of turning the tables on us and only then can we truly truly see (and feel) the enormity of our decisions.

I hope you get to learn your lessons but not the hard way.

This will, I'm sure incite a few readers to look at their own lives.
A successful write then.

Happy 2017
:))

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Thank you, Tony, for your insight here! I think I'm too stubborn to learn 😂
This was an itself reflective review! Always appreciated ☺

[Tony Jordan]

welcome YumnaKay.
:)