Moon and Sun

An opposite poem I wrote for school. Is it any good? Please review.

Moon and Sun

The soft white glow,

of the lovely moon.

The bright lightshow,

of the handsome sun.

 

But now it's disappearing,

Barely a sliver, anymore.

Nature's night-light,

Is no more.

 

And where is the sun?

It's sinking away!

Down below the horizion,

The end of another day.

 

Now the moon is moving,

Blocking out the sun.

The world eclipsing,

no one has won.

Author's Note

I'm not sure about the end...any suggestions?
Please don't be rude! Constructive criticism appreciated!

Reviews

[Emza S]

Thanks April, I think I'm going to use that. I couldn't really think of an ending lol.

And thanks so much Alice! I haven't read Eva's stuff.. does she post it here? If so I'll check it out.

[Coby]

Oh this was beautiful Emma, I loved it. Im gonna put it on my writing wall in my room (I put poems and stuff I like on there) :3 (most of Melissas stuff is on there XD)
I agree with April, that line does sound a bit better

[ape domenigoni]

how about...the world eclipsing, no one has won? I don't know, but I do like the poem. great work!

[Jasmin]

Over all i liked this poem, but the last line just kinda leaves me hanging. I think you should either add a line, or change the last line