I dream of you

Last night

I dreamed of you.

 

My heart

It ached.

How I yearn

For your affection.

 

A flame

That once

Blazed.

Now lay

Smouldering,

I try

To stir

And rekindle

To no avail.

 

I am invisible,

Withdrawn.

Like,

I no longer exist.

Cast away

I am adrift.

 

On the ocean

Of

Your heart.

Battling

A raging sea,

Fighting to stay

Afloat.

 

I reach for

Your hand.

Slowly

Slipping

Its grasp.

 

My sails

Have torn,

No paddle,

No life jacket.

I am losing,

Hope.

 

The waves

Overcome me

I drown

In the emptiness

Of your heart.

Lost

Forgotten maybe

I will

Never know.

I am dead

I lost

My soul.

 

Into

The abyss

I go,

A struggle

I give into.

 

The darkness

Welcomes me,

My body

My soul

Slowly fading

Away.

 

Last night

I dreamed of you.

 

Author's Note

Titles titles, why do we strain to find the right one?

Reviews

[...]

I will be call this poem gentle darkness. It's quiet sad piece but there is so many beautiful expressions at this piece. For me it's feel like prelude on the piano. Some dark tones vibrating with bright melodies. I can really feel music in this flow. For me this piece talk at so many layers. But what i will be pointed out it's desire to stay positive even end be very scary. I like that.

[lawrence bear]

Thank you for your review.

[DarkArtz 0703]

My sails

Have torn,

No paddle,

No life jacket.

I am losing,

Hope.


I love those lines
neat work I look forward to reading more

[Deandra Dawn]

I stumbled upon this again and realized I commented on it two years ago. I just wanted you to know that I am still drawn to it and I still love it!

[lawrence bear]

Thank you so much. :)

[Deandra Dawn]

You are very welcome!

[B]

So touching
And so lovely
And simple

[PloughBoy]

Very darkly dreary free verse, Lawrence. The cascading, spiraling down effect of the format you've chosen fits nicely with the poetic narrative, that tumbling, falling look you've employed. A-h-h-h-h-h, that abyss. I've teetered precariously on the edge myself a time or two...

Excellent work. Keep writing!

[Deandra Dawn]

I absolutely loved this. The format, the flow, the words...so strong and to the point. Love love. Thank you for sharing.

[Mary Bosworth]

This goes beyond the ordinary. Feels expansive in its message.

[lawrence bear]

Thank you for your review Mary

[Marie Anzalone]

Oh, my friend, it pains me to know that you know the depths of this despair, the pain of feeling alone in the world while lying next to someone who used to love you. I have no words fo conslation. The way you wrote this put me there, with you, back into some memories of my own that are almost too painful to bear. Masterful, and hauntingly beautiful. Thank you for sharing the gift of your vulnerability with us.

[lawrence bear]

Thank you Marie, glad you liked it.

[SADS]

Pain went into the writing of this poem and so it emanates from it to the reader. Simple and devastating

[lawrence bear]

Thank you for your review.

[A]

Wow, nice poem...I felt Ur rift in it...good job:)

[lawrence bear]

Thank you audrey :)