Chapter IV

Our lives endured living on the edge all the time especially for me, Mike, Andrea and I think even Jenny. Her life continued to involve regular treatment and test and more treatment. Every time she got sick, our hearts would hit bottom. We’re always nervous thinking this would be the day. Years had passed with that kind of feelings in our hearts. I always asked myself why Jenny, why not me. But then again when I got sick, Jenny got the same feelings I got even though she knew that mine was just a cold or flu and it would go in time. They pampered me to the max, even when she was young when I got sick Andrea and she would just pamper me with love and attention. People always feel sorry for the person who is dying, but what about the person who loves the one dying. I thought they should have the same sympathy for both, the one who is living his last days and the one who is watching him live his last days. Watching Jenny live with this was harder on me because I could not do anything, even with all my wealth in this world. I cannot do anything to change that she is going away from me. Its God’s providence that I get to enjoy Jenny; It will be in His perfect timing, when He will take Jenny from me.

January 15th, 1992. I got a surprised phone call from Alice in the office. At first, I didn’t know what to do, whether to take the call or tell my secretary to make some excuses, but I took the call after a few minutes of debate with myself. It turned out that right after college she went out of the country to finished master degree in Europe. She went to Paris and worked there as a fashion consultant. The company that she was working for sent her back here in Texas to be the executive manger of the company here they just started. Never in my dream, I thought of getting a phone call from her, nor would I be seeing her. Jenny was my focused that I never really thought of anything else especially girls. Alice asked if I could have lunch with her. I was curious myself about her I said yes. I met her at a restaurant close to her work.

Alice was already waiting for me when I got in. It is an Italian restaurant, quiet and roomy. There weren’t many customers inside. Lunch hour mob was over. The wall has many big decorative plates with European theme. The waiter escorted me to Alice’s table. Alice stood up to greet me with a hug. I returned the same courtesy we both sat down and the waiter gave us the menu. We took our time ordering and eating. We had a lot to talk.

We spent almost the rest of the day talking about everything. To reacquaint with each other because it has been years and we had really did not know each other that well in college. All I knew was that she was a little interested in me and I quite liked her. She looked even more beautiful than she was in college. Alice, five feet seven inches tall one hundred seventeen pounds. She has very straight and long honey blond hair, hazel eyes, petite body. She had more of the sophisticated look, the way she dresses and the way she carried herself. I guess working on this field makes you practice on yourself everyday. She never ran out of things to say, on the other hand I liked it because I didn’t have much stuff to tell. I didn’t think she would want to listen to me rambling about Jenny, though I like talking about her all the time. When we said goodbye, she told me that she wanted to see me again sometime when I’m able. I didn’t know what to say, so I just said, “That would be nice.”

When I got home, I told Jenny all about it and she just smiled. Andrea was the one who was curious and suspicious all at the same time, drilling me with thousands of questions about her. Andrea was just being a typical mother. After I finished telling both of them about Alice and what Alice said about wanting to see me again Jenny got closer and said, “I like that. I want you to see more of her also. It’s good for you. I want you to think of yourself once in awhile, not just always thinking about me.”

I didn’t get what she meant, “What do you mean good for me?”

“Oh, come on Matt,” she smiled again, “You know what I mean. I’m all grown up, I will be in junior college this fall, I have one more year to go then, I’ll be graduating. Remember, what you said before, that when I’m grown up, you would get married someday, well, I think, that time has come.”

She kissed my nose, and then left me. I chased her trying to pick an argument with her, “On this time, huh ha. With your condition like this, I promised I would never ever let you out of my sight.” I should have known not to pick an argument with her she’d always rolled over. I’ve yet to lose an argument with her.

Alice and I started seeing a lot of each other but mostly for lunch. I didn’t want to do anything with her on evenings and weekends because these were reserve for Jenny. I wasn’t serious about relationship with others anyway, not with Jenny’s health on the line. I figured I reached this far without them why not go farther yet. I was happy doing what I was doing. We did see each other three times a week if not more. Alice was more aggressive in pursuing things when she has her mind set on it, she didn’t like that I only get to see her for lunch. After two months of this kind of arrangement, Alice together with her roommate and best friend Beth, they decided to pay me a visit in the house one weekend.

One Saturday afternoon it was getting late Jenny wasn’t feeling very good she wanted to rest on the balcony and watched the view. I joined her and played games with her while she relaxed on the lounge chair. We were playing a game called ‘Knock Out,’ it’s a game with the same principles and rules as a game of ‘Trouble’ or ‘Sorry.’ We made our own rules before we started the game. Sometimes we played it friendly means neither her nor I could knock a peg and send it back to start again. Other times we played pass through where you can’t stay in the middle. You have to get an exact number to pass through the middle, and sometimes we played it total knockout, where you even have to go out of your way just to knock your opponent out. We always had fun doing the total knockout rule because it’s challenging and it takes a long time to finished. Sometimes it’s frustrating to your opponent especially if you keep knocking her peg when it’s very close to going home but your peg is also vulnerable because you are in the opponent’s turf.

We we’re in the middle of a big argument about the game, whether to play pass through or total knockout, when Andrea came up and told me that I had company waiting for me downstairs. She told me their names. Bewildered, I told Andrea that I would be down in a few minutes. Jenny told me she wanted to meet them so I asked Andrea to bring them up instead. Andrea went down to tell them. Jenny and I waited for them. I tried to fix myself up, when Jenny said, “You look great, don’t worry.”

I gently slugged Jenny on the shoulder. “I wasn’t expecting them to come here at all. I wonder what they want or why they came.” I was curious to hear from them myself.

“Maybe they just want to see where you live, or maybe Alice just wanted to check on you since you keep giving her excuses every time she asked you out on weekends.” Jenny laughed, she thought what she said was amusing. I looked at her with ‘I don’t like it’ kind of look and she stopped almost immediately.

Moments later, Andrea showed up with Alice and Beth. I stood up to meet them. Alice came to me and gave a hug. When she let go, she turned her head to Jenny. I introduced Alice to Jenny, “Alice this is my precious sister, Jenny. Jenny, this is Alice.” Jenny just smiled and she extended her hand to Alice. Alice shook Jenny’s hand and introduced Beth to her as well then she said to Jenny. “Matt told me a lot about you. You look even more beautiful in person,” smiled Alice

“Thank you,” Jenny smiled back, “You too, you look prettier than I imagined.”

Alice turned back to me. “Beth and I were in the neighborhood so we decided to pay you guys a visit.”

Andrea went down stairs to get some drinks. When she came back, she had tray of glasses and a pitcher of fresh squeezed lemonade, and some cookies to go with it. She set them down on the table. I offered our guest some drinks. We sat down and enjoyed the drinks Andrea served before us. Alice took a sip of her lemonade then she got up and stared at the view in front of her. Beth followed. I stood up and joined them when Beth asked me about the lake. I could tell that they had something planned, I could see their facial signals and body movements to each other they’re just looking for a perfect timing to say it. I opened the floor for them. “You two looked like you’re going somewhere.”

Alice took the bait. “Beth and I were just wondering if you had plans for tonight. I was going to invite you to accompany me to a party we’re attending tonight. It’s our best friend’s party and I want you to come.”

I looked at Jenny for some answer but she wasn’t looking at me she was busy talking to Andrea. I looked back at Alice, “I’m sorry, I couldn’t leave Jenny right now; she’s not feeling very well maybe next time when Jenny is doing fine?”

Alice looked away from me because she didn’t like my answer. She looked at Beth ready to chew on anything that gets in her way.

I wanted Alice to get the impression that Jenny has a hold of me, that I wouldn’t do anything, or go anywhere if she’s not in good health. I glanced at Alice, her face showed disappointment, she faced Beth and the two were signaling to each other.

Jenny heard what I said she turned and looked up. Alice and Beth were about to say something to encourage me to changed my mind when Jenny said, “Why don’t you go, and enjoy their company.” She winked at me. “I will be fine. Andrea is here, and I think Mike is coming tonight.” Alice face lit up. “We won’t stay very long I promised you. Please say yes. Jenny wanted you to go.” She was pleading profusely, her hands clamped together and she had these sad puppy dog eyes. Beth joined in with her. I didn’t really feel like going but Jenny passably talked me into going with them. “Are you sure you’re okay?” I felt Jenny’s forehead; it’s not that bad. “Well, just give me a few minutes to get ready; what’s the attire, casual or formal?”

“Oh casual, sharp casual you don’t need to have suit and tie,” Alice was happy. Before I went downstairs, I asked Jenny if she wanted to go down also, she nodded; she stood on the chair. I turned my back to her and squatted a little she climbed on my back. I gave Jenny piggyback ride going down the stairs. Alice and Beth stayed behind, they were whispering to each other, Beth whispered, “She’s being carried downstairs, what a service.”

“I know she’s spoiled to the bone. She doesn’t even need to ask she just expects it.”

“He’s babying her. She will be your tough competition.”

“No kidding,” they looked at each other, then shrugged their shoulders.

Jenny was use to being carried going down or going up because when she was very young I started this thing with her especially when she’s sick. It became a habit of me to give her always a piggyback ride.

I took my time changing, procrastinating and dilly dallying was more like it. It wasn’t as if I didn’t want to be with Alice, I just worried about Jenny since she’s not feeling very good, and I promised her that I wouldn’t leave her sight in times like this. Jenny came in my room to check what’s taking me so long when she saw me moving as if I didn’t want to go. She apologized for putting me on this situation and told me that she won’t do it again. I gave her a firm look, “You better not do it again otherwise I will be upset. I don’t like leaving you like this.” I smiled to let her know I was just giving her a hard time.

Ever since that night Alice got me to go out with her she took that as a license to ask me, we went out at least twice a month on weekends besides our regular luncheon. The third time we went out on weekend at night, Jenny was somewhat fine when I left. Mike was visiting Jenny so it wasn’t bad to leave her. I left around 6:00 PM because I still need to pick up Alice, have dinner, and she wanted to see the Broadway musical that was in town. I didn’t get home until after midnight. When I came in, Andrea was in the kitchen crying. I parked the car in the garage and I used the utility door that leads to the kitchen. I asked Andrea what’s wrong. At first she hugged me then she looked at me straight in the eye as she explained, “Try not to say anything until I finished explaining.”

I pulled up a chair and sat down next to her. I didn’t say anything like she asked. I waited for her to tell me everything. Andrea began to explain, “Jenny is sleeping now, but early this evening, Jenny and Mike played pool upstairs, then they watched the sunset at the balcony. They didn’t get down until I called them for supper. Around 8:40 tonight, Mike said goodbye to Jenny because she was complaining of being tired, and Mike had something to do for his Mom also. Jenny showed Mike to the door. After Mike left, and before Jenny went to her room she went upstairs to get her book that she left in the game room. I didn’t know she went upstairs. On the way down, I heard Jenny screaming my name, and then I heard a loud thump afterwards. I ran to her but as I got there, I saw Jenny on the bottom of the stairs. She fell going down stairs, she was conscious, she didn’t hit her head because she somewhat holding on to the railing but she got scrapes on her back. I asked her what happened, she just told me that she was on fourth steps from the top when she got dizzy all of a sudden and lost her balance. She doesn’t have any broken bones or anything.”

“That’s why I didn’t like her going up there by herself.” I snapped, “Why didn’t you call me or page me?”

“Because Jenny didn’t want me to bother you with it, her reason was it wasn’t that bad, but I did call Dr. Martin because she had a fever after that and I want to make sure her back is all right.”

“Andrea, please, next time things like this happened I want you to call me. I don’t care if Jenny didn’t want you to, because you know if you tell her you need to do it, she doesn’t argue. No wonder I was nervous around that time too. I should have called.” I gave Andrea a kiss on her cheek then went to Jenny’s room to check on her.

After a year had passed, Alice took me to meet her parents Mr. and Mrs. Daniel and Lisa Herring. Mr. Herring is in a car business. He owns a dealership in their little town called Sugar land. They spoiled Alice, since she’s the only daughter, and the youngest. Alice has three older brothers; two of them married and have their own kids. The youngest brother and Alice are still single. We pursued seeing each other, and developed a deeper relationship, at least I did. I started to fall for her and she had a charm that I couldn’t resist. Even though I was seeing Alice, I never forgot my responsibility with Jenny; I talked to Alice before that when Jenny is not feeling good I don’t want to leave her side. She respected that and she never insisted if I told her I couldn’t see her.