Free Fall

Free Fall

By

Jose M. Euvin

 

I’m screaming my heart out

Yet you can’t see

I’m dying without you

Please come back to me

 

All the time that I lost

How long will it last

Before it gets worse

Reminiscing the past

 

As time goes on

I start to look back

It’s time to move on

And get back on track

 

I lost all desires

But whose there to blame

The mirror don’t lie

It reflects all my shame!

 

Desires are lost

Decisions are not

Freedom is granted

And lost in a flash

 

Suicidal tendencies

Disturbing my life

Before me is a cliff

Should I take the dive?

 

I take one last breath

And make my decision

Here comes the fall

The end of my mission!

 

Reviews

[*** Hey Jude***]

The pain of losing a loved one can be paralizing. I like the way you have expressed these intense emotions in poem! ~ N

[SPINNING ON that dizzy ..]

Losing love is a hard thing to do... I hope that this helped to get these feelings out - and one who can feel like this - this strong emotion and sad loss - can go on an find someone who will take these in her sweet hands and mold them into something and someone who is worthy of you. Make the mission the time to move on .... there is more to be had.

kath

[R J Askew]

Nothing is worth taking the plunge for. We go on right? We never know how our luck might change! But love being love, its loss can hoodwink us into such deeply dark moods.

[Bittercream]

You know that dreams of dying always mean that there will be a new beginning? The same with the Tarot card 'Death'.
So I hope your fall means something similar, it did in my poems but I noticed long after writing them.
You poem is touching me very deep. I love it!

[Kristizzle9008]

i really dont kno what to say but i like this poem....i think u are getting better as u write them...love ya!

[Angelheaded Hipster]

Im noticing a common theme in your writing, and I do hope that writing her out of your system is helping...
as a reviewer below me noted...try writing a piece where you come out on top once in a while, break the cycle of keeping yourself wrapped in the heart ache...it will make you feel better little by little, day by day..

[Inda Lauryn]

It's a really dark piece, but I tend to like that sort of thing. It flows really well, too. I like poems and admire poets that use traditional form since I'm not able to write that way. Also, it's an honest emotion and not afraid to be morbid.

By the way, I noticed that line 14 used "whose" instead of "who's." I wonder if it was intentional.

[Brette Medb]

I liked it, it was dark and it was emotional and to top it all off it had a great flow! I could picture or well more like hear it as a song. Great write,.

Brette

[Nick Erickson]

Dark and gloomy piece, though flowing well, full of emotion and pain.
I hope this is getting things off your chest, a theoretical "dive" from a cliff for you... and I hope you feel better now that you've written this.
Write a poem where you come out on top and that'll make you feel better. It'll be more theraputic.