In Our Garden

Rough

I'll have in forever...
forgotten whispers of wants, vespers
of change, changing these thoughts of
you dancing up my legs, shooting across
my belly like fire, the purest flame to ever
dance on flesh
and in each particle of it is you,
your perfection lost in the flicker and fury,
singing songs of us, singeing my hair,
my cares out the window, melted away from
the heat of our passion, your fiery dancing.
My fiery dancer dances over oceans of time,
hurricanes left behind from the heat
over the cool-cool waters of lives lived
without her.

I'll have in forever...
my reception of you, the not-much-soul-left
before it, the lifelessness prior, the shock
to the spirit, the spine cracked upright like
the dawn of man, descending the trees,
roaming the land of birth, birthing
new Earths in my trail, ascending to stars.
Like apple for Eve, my heart is yours,
no serpent will slither from trees onto
your breast, no beast will ravage
your flock and plunder its weakness nor
wilt the petals of blossoming hearts.
Your whole being, your pretty red heart,
rattling its cage, is free to roam in this
garden you've grown, where there was
scorched Earth
before these seeds you've sewn,
the slash and burn styled agriculture
left in your wake, my fiery dancer

Reviews

[Dizzy-Izzy]

"the not-much-soul-left" I like that line Mr. Mike, so many people walking around with just a little piece left. What happens when you give it all away? I hadn't thought about that before... maybe that is why vampire books, and such are so popular. Vampires don't have souls.

I am intrigued by the stories of the garden. The beginning of time, the tree of knowledge... I always wondered why it is that the devil takes the form of a serpent. I don't intend to make any of the obvious jokes about it, and believe me I have made plenty. Hmm... he tricked her you know. Well, sort of ... She knew the rules, but the devil made her question just exactly what they meant.

"Siss... did he really say you'd die?" You could take that and insert just about any question...

"Siss... did he/she/they really say.... ....?" whatever.

We all want to feel like god don't we? Like we have it all under control, that we know what's what, what is the right thing to do. Not so unlike that first bad choice... misinformed or not... Eve might have wanted to believe that she was duped... but, I think she knew what was going on, just hoping for a different outcome... Haven't we just mapped out every relationship, every presidential campaign, every ...... (insert every choice that didn't turn out quite the way you wanted)?

Now Mr. Mike how 'bout some apple pie?

Ms. K

[Emily B]

Passionate forevers found somewhere between the light and the shadow. A brilliant love song.

[Alice]

Oh wow.
Oh my.
Oh, goodbye eloquence, I wish you wouldn't desert me so, come back and help me tell Mike how much I love this and him and him for this. No?
Then I'm left with Oh wow.

[Katrina]

pretty. i like this a lot. this is my weak review for i am the tired. but i couldn't not say anything. -kat stamp-

xxx