Mind Over Matter

They say in love and war everything count .

But some how there was always a doubt.

My love for you is wrong and they tears i cry are strong .

But I'll give my soul .

Sincerely , was never sincere between the lonelyness of these four walls i'll cry my a*s to sleep .

In rest our love , sleep in peace to our heart because we never gave them a break we just went back to back.

I clasify myself as a monster , a love predator , a serial heart killer .

Be aware because my love ia strong and willing to give my all

This morning i woke up realizing MIND OVER MATTER.

My heart feel like a pizza pie , broken into pieces .

My body feel weak , no strength at all.

My emotions are dead , literally are dead , no feelings at all.

I listen more to what i think because doing what i feel some how would get me killed .

The say mind over matter but i have thought a little way to harder .

Reviews

[Glen Yumang Manese]

Let’s dissect this verse… and make the points intersect…seems with this passage the words come out of young love…the ways in which you find a resolve…

They say in love and war everything counts.

Somehow, there was always doubt.
My love for you is wrong.
The tears I cry are strong.
I'll give my soul.

Sincerely, was never sincere –
Between the loneliness of these, four walls.
I’ll cry my a*s to sleep.
In rest is our love, sleep in peace to our hearts.

We never gave them a break.
We just went back to back.
I classify myself a monster, a love predator, or a serial heart killer.
Be aware because my love is strong and willing to give my all.

This morning I woke up realizing MIND OVER MATTER.
My heart felt like a pizza pie, broken into pieces.
My body felt weak, no strength at all.
My emotions are dead, literally are dead, no feelings at all.

I listen more to what I think.
Because doing what I feel somehow would get me killed.
They say mind over matter.
But I have thought a little way too harder.

In the end you express the whole thought…believing you put everything out there…that needs to be said…and the last line says that for you…I had to clear the verse and understand this better…I hope you agree with the changes…but this is your work…you can leave as is…this is just my opinion of your writing.

[Pax]

Mind Over Matter
~ I have been debating on that thought for quite some time... but i do believed when you put your mind on something and determine to strive for a good cause... it will definitely push through...

another expressive piece...

[Sami Khalil]

Pen on . A very good one...:)
I think you have a typo : loneliness ( lonelyness)

[me]

Very nice poem. The emotion is great. Just a few lines don't flow together perfectly, but other than that I love it.

[Adriana C.]

Thank you very much .