Lost

staring at this blank page, i just cant think
starting to wonder, who am i without the drink
my whole life is starting to lose its way
what scares me the most is that i have no say

too many friends i have decided to ditch
maybe life isn't better when your a b***h
they say im too pretty to have my face as a cake
i'm just not understanding how i became so fake

buying pushup bras and dressing like a s**t
who i used to be just doesn't make the cut
drinking all the time , the only fruit i buy is limes
partying everynight, and calling hook ups good times

most nights i just cry myself to sleep
why now am i so shallow and not deep
im f*****g up my life slowly one thing at a time
im at the bottom , like little particles of grime

loving a boy but sleeping at his bestfriends house
trying to go behind his back , quietly like a mouse
now hes told me he hates me and wont talk to me anymore
he said were done for good and now hes closing the door

now i keep getting into trouble with the cops and the law
blowing the breathalyzer at the side of the road where everyone saw
going to parties and getting in fights
these are now my daily nights

having a kill count and spending money on getting drunk
man , honestly all my important morals have just sunk
this is not the girl i ever wanted to be
i wish i could change to be a new me

so everyone wishes that they were pretty
your the one that's going to get the pity
trust me, popularity isn't all what it seems
its not that way you saw it in your dreams

im slowly starting over and its going to be hard
theres no luck to this or the way i play my card
ill only keep the friends i can be real with
anyone can change , ill prove its not a myth.

Reviews

[deeps]

I hve been here! This is amazing!!!
I really loved your second stanza.

[Kaotic Barbie]

I have been down this road. I can feel so much in this poem. It really stabs me deep. You put it together very nicely. Great Write

[.]

You can be whoever to choose to be..it's your choice..to many people believe that's their lot in life but that's not the case, your life is in your hands, no one can tell you who you are..that is entirely your choice..great poem, great rhyme and meter..really enjoyed this