work to do

That was when I was 12.a child and wise beyond my years. Those were the years that I was gullible. When my mom told me that my father would come home. That Larry really was the best man she ever had and that white powder mama snorted was medicine. To get her through the day. It was the time when I started figuring out things about the world and people around me. That we were poor and everyone on the other side of town says were 'trailer trash'. I started to get to know myself better too liked vanilla over chocolat,I liked to wear pants more than I did skirts. I didn’t think I’d ever have long beautiful legs like my mother. And I learned about my body too. that I had a 'nice pair of tits for a kid’ or at least that’s what all of the guys who use to show up to my mom’s block parties told me. shed nearly killed one man. her good friend Chester cause he paid me for a kiss. he said he was teaching me young like he did my mama but I just wanted the money. my mom held a knife to his neck and told him to beat it. said I wasn’t no hussy.im not sure what that means though raised myself after we left larry.
      we ended up on the coast of California in a town called venice.it was nice there. my mom said it was bohemian liked the sound of that. we drove for a while to get there. mama said a day and a half was too far from larry. I didn’t think it was far enough. we lived with my aunt for a bit. but she kicked us out after a while. said my mom was lazy and needed to take care of her own kid. no one else took care of me.i stayed out Of their way. I don’t see how it was my fault we got kicked out but I felt bad for it.
      we went to live with one of my mamas friends after that. He called himself big low. He was Native American and smoked from a pipe that he shared with mama all day. Big low died in the fall though. Doctors said he died from an overdose. But mama made me leave the room and I never heard any details.
     Now we stay on the coast. In no more than a shack of an apartment. It’s called the vista complex but there’s nothing complex about it. Our rent was due at the end of the week and I new mom wouldn’t have i.e. didn’t unpack my things yet so I’d be ready to leave.
     im 16now.no money and a job on the side’s lift things. as in shop lift. then I sell em on the board.i pushed the details of my life outta mind. no use thinkin bout the past.i sat on our complexes roof.two stories above our apartment. no one els know how to get up there but me and the birds.the doors were sealed off to it.but i had my ways.i sat their on the edge.my knees To my cheast.it was almost dawn and the ocean was dancing for me.the waves crashed and the earliest of surfers speckled to water.id seen those same surfers around.but took no notice to them this morning.i waited for the sunrise.sunrises were always mine.something that no one could take away.i watched the horizon and then looked at my watch.almost time.my sunrise would be here any moment. i lived for the sunrise really.its what i could count on. the sun always came up.no matter what.the sun didnt get hang overs and forget that you had a feild trip that day.the sun didnt cancell your dentist appointments cause she knew she couldnt afford barces for you.the sun was strong and something that you could see. It happened in a few short seconds but i saw the golden tip of the sun break over the waves.
          i sat their in silence as the sun went from no more than a sliver to a golden orb that lay low in the sky. it seemed to set the sky and water ablaze sending firy rays all over. the water seemed to welcocme the comming sun. the waves broke faster and the sets were perfect. if i had time to serf today would be the gnarliest day.but i had to go.i had work to do.with that i switched into gear.i hoped up and balanced on the ledge till i got to the drain.im on the thin side for my age so it was easy for me to climb up and down the drain pipes. i hit the ground at a run. i had lifting to do today.
         money wasnt gunna make its self.and i think my mom was on one of her tripps in her bed room.id stopped wondering for the day that id come home and found that shed O.D and died. it was a matter of time.it almost happened a few times but.i wasnt around.i ran down the back ally.it was a friday.that means trash day in Centerfeild.the rich neighborhood a few blocks from mine.i had the keys to the wagon and i had to hurry to pick up my business partner lolita.she lived a few streets down in the barrio apartments.it was really called the san angelita housing development.but no one there over 25 spoke english so it was a barrio by blood and by nature.i was at her house in five minuets.she was standing in the front.'ay chica what took your a*s so long'i rolled my eyes and poped the w aggons passenger door open.she slid in.lolita was a pretty girl.but not the type youd wanna get mixed up with.she was a pitbull with stelletos on.her soft skin pouty lips and almond eyes made her look innocent.but her a*s was what made the guys stare.we drove down the block and headed for the high way.the neighborhood was empty around this time always.drunks and crack heads dont wake up befor three.their was no traffic so it was smooth sailing.
       I could tell lolita  was tired.by the time we got to the richeys neighborhood she was passed out drooling on the window.i couldnt help but to laugh at my best friend.what the f**k were we doing?every day we get up and leave around seven to go pick through the trash of poloticians and lawyers.not for jucy gossip or legal papers like paparratzi do.we try to find anything that we can hawk for five bucks.we went to low budget low security shops and robbed them blind with only $30worth of s**t and we take it back to a table we have to set up and take down every day.this life was all i knew though.i couldnt be one of the tourists that we hustled for money.the ones who stayed in fancy hotels and go shopping for suvineers on the board walk.this was how i mad a living.supporting me and my kid i called mother.i smacked lo on the shoulder 'ah lo lo wake up.were here.get ur tired a*s up we got s**t to do.' dont tell me to get up.u get ur a*s up.i had to watch chewy and martinez last night.'
        Lolita was related to everyone in her apartment complex. or at least thats what her abulita told her. I think it’s just bull so she doesn’t hook up with one of the many chulos there. But we can’t be too sure. The two older sisters worked third shift jobs at a dry cleaners as the cleaning service so the placed looked freshly manicured in the morning.lolita was stuck watching both their kids.
        We got out of the car. it was still very early and the morning fog hadn’t risen yet. we looked over our shoulders and made sure no one was outside. there was a man jogging in the opposite direction but he had a pair of head phones in. rich a*s.ha and was listening to a new walkman radios to have everything when they first come out. we checked and checked again. when we both knew no one was watching we took the lids off the trash cans. I had my pocket knife in my hand already and I ripped open the first bag...it smelled like raw horse a*s.food was the top layer but under that their was something metal and shiny.we dug through It was a blender.looked brand new.i ran over and put it in the back of the car.we left it running incase we needed a quick get away.we left that house with a brush comb set.bleneder.bottle of nail polish remover half full.two out dated bottles of asprin.a book light and some other little s**t.
          we hit up three more houses then went down to big thrift about a mile or two up the raod.big thrif was where the richys gave their brand new cloths that they only where once to the 'poor' and 'less fortunate'it was all over priced designer clothing.i made lo lo hit this place up.though she looked like a stripper she was dressed classier than me.she tried to pull down he purple micro mini as far as it would go.it helped but not by much.i handed her a jacket from the back s eat.i had no idea whos it was.and the took the oversized leather jacket and wore it like a robe.hes setlletos just screamed hooker. 
     oh well.at this place they employed retards and amputees.if her a*s got cought lifting here id Never stop laughing about it.she walked off in to the store.i gave her seven minuets tops.id go in with her but i didnt fit the part at all.i looked down at myself.my pantes were high waisted bell bottoms.they w ere semi new.given i snagged em on the beach when some pretty blond was swimming and they fit pretty well too.and my top was a kroched halter that covered tits and thats it.which i guess i still did have a nice pair of.not to big but not tiny.they didnt sag either like i knew lolitas did.but hers were huge so i know the boys didnt mind.i wasnt wearins shoes.i never did here in venice.it was to warm and they kept me hot.but i did keep a pair of sandals in the babck.i pulled down the sun visor and flipped dopen t he mirror.s**t my skin was oily this morning.id neglected to wash my face for days.but the tan oily look wowrked for me.high cheek bones and hazel eyes on tan skin made me look exotic compared to the beach blondes who run around on the board all day.i just couldnt pull Off being a blond.id bleached my hair a year ago but then cut it all of.itd grown abck its same sandy color to the middle of my back  but instead of being bone stright it grew back wavy.i didnt mind it so much.

i waited in the car,that girl could take forever i swear.i proped my elbow on the ca door and rested my head on my arm.for us to be stealing,i was quite calm i realized.it didnt even phase me anymore.that was pittiful.i could steal from society and not take a second glance.