Morning Ritual

Morning Ritual

A Story by Commander S.T

Footsteps, lights on, eyes closed, door open. Footsteps lights off, eyes open, door closed. Waking up to a room with lights strong enough to make a vampire disintegrate, I was rudely awakened by the voice of my mother yelling " Rise and shine with grape nut flakes.” then the door slams. As time goes by I’m trying to decide whether or not I should continue my dream. Another minute goes by. Then again I hear the small patter of my mother’s footsteps switching flooring material. Strangely she's a small woman and yet I can hear her footsteps with some sort of echo on the carpet. Kinda like when they say the smaller the dog the bigger the bite. She wears these strange penny loafers as slippers that sorta makes a sound like two pickles being rubbed together. 

As she is walking towards my room I can figure out that she's plotting on what she's going to do to wake me up and how she's going to do it.

Now this theory isn't based off of just me thinking that she is out to get me, it’s based off of the fact that she is mumbling angrily almost as if she was from some sort of censored movie. Footsteps getting louder with each passing moment and yet I’m wondering if I should fake the funk, or just get up." Little girl I know, I you heard me calling you, it’s time for you to get up and get ready for school." Now at this point I’m still contemplating on getting up. But then in the same thought I’m thinking it’s too late to make an irrational decision.  "I'm not sleep!" "You better get up and get ready for school I'm not going to tell you again, if I have to come back in here you're going to feel it" " Alright man dagg" " I aint no darn ol’ man, and I'm not one of your little friends out there in those streets." Then the door slams again. Through all the arguing surprisingly I was still in my "deep" sleep. But when that door slammed I woke up with a sudden jolt like I was struck by lightning and hit my head on the head board. So not only was I rudely awakened from my beauty sleep but I now have this blue whale sized headache. I think I'm concussed, I had a few seconds of darkness, and no I'm not a doctor but I don’t think that’s good. Despite the fact  that I'm supposed to be getting ready for school, I decide to lay back down. It’s already now 6:45, I still don’t have my clothes out, and I gotta do my hair. I rolled to the other side of my bed, and now I’m officially up. Lights off the only light I see are the light coming through the venetian blinds. The sun halfway arisen with kind of an orangeish greenish like color illuminates my room and now it has a strange hue but it’s bright enough to see the color of my clothes. 

So now I have my clothes out dragging around the rest of the house. My mother thankfully went back to sleep so no more yelling and rushing. It is now 6:55 and my bus comes at 7:15. I am in the process of looking at my face in the mirror looking for some new feature that has possibly appeared when I was sleeping. I take my shower, brushed my teeth, and then waited to decide if I’m going to put lotion on or not. Now, lotion takes time to rub in, and I really don’t have that much time to waste. Outside the sun has completely risen, and the dog next door who I so effortlessly named Rexy, was barking so now I know for sure it’s time to leave. So I put on my clothes skipping the lotioning up part, forgetting to get my four packages of oatmeal, I quickly threw on my coat and was out the door by exactly 7:13 and literally like the second I crossed the street my bus came and then I realized it was the weekend and I didn’t have school

© 2012 Commander S.T


Author's Note

Commander S.T
This is my first memoir please tell me what you think

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Featured Review

Lots of good similes and metaphors in here.
"She wears these strange penny loafers as slippers that sorta makes a sound like two pickles being rubbed together."

"...but I now have this blue whale sized headache."

The scene is well set. When I write, and ideas flow, I just try to hang on and get them out. Then I go through a process of drafts, or rewrites based on re-reading what I have. One good way to rewrite is to read your piece aloud, and record it, or have someone read it to you as you follow along with a copy, noting where you want to make changes.

This is a great story, build your memoir from a series of pieces like this.
Keep the ideas flowing.

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

I think it's pretty easy to follow and made me giggle at certain parts. You should just write a whole memoir I think it would be good

Posted 6 Years Ago


Lots of good similes and metaphors in here.
"She wears these strange penny loafers as slippers that sorta makes a sound like two pickles being rubbed together."

"...but I now have this blue whale sized headache."

The scene is well set. When I write, and ideas flow, I just try to hang on and get them out. Then I go through a process of drafts, or rewrites based on re-reading what I have. One good way to rewrite is to read your piece aloud, and record it, or have someone read it to you as you follow along with a copy, noting where you want to make changes.

This is a great story, build your memoir from a series of pieces like this.
Keep the ideas flowing.

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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Added on February 3, 2012
Last Updated on February 3, 2012

Author

Commander S.T
Commander S.T

Newark , NJ



About
I am very enthusiastic.I absolutely LOVE to write.Also i am very passionate and love to put myself in the shoes of others. more..

Writing