May The Bridges I Burn Light The Way

My trigger is sensitive

A taste, a smell, a touch

Activating the dark part of the mind

Releasing the scenes,

Haunting, exploding 

Images of terror escape

And my heart retaliates-- 

Beating too fast to catch a breath

It's all in my head
It's all in my head
But the numbness refuses to fade
I'm alone
Too weak to fight the feeling
I'm insane
Hold my heart I think it's bleeding

In passing moments I see color
And the sound of the world around
Blinking, sighing, crying,
Feeling so alive 
No longer numb

But oh so afraid--
Of the triggers to come

 

Author's Note

The title "May the bridges I burn light the way" was not originally written by me. It just represents my struggle of dealing with panic attacks and how I've learn to move past them.

Reviews

[Annie29]

I have panic attacks as well! As when it happens it's like my mind goes to 50 different places. Well written.

[Marie Anzalone]

I empathize with your pain. During transition times, I can get them 2-3 times a day. I have found that it helps to focus on breathing, and keep positive quotes and dark chocolate always within reach. 37 years old and sometimes I am still afraid of the dark. I promise you though it does get easier. Work through it, and one day you will awaken and find they are gone. You have captured the essnce of what it is like to be in their throes, masterfully.

[Not Your Typical New Yo..]

Sometimes I get panic attacks while riding the elevator, or when something is way too crowed, and you feel that people around you are stealing your very breath. Anywho, I like this write about fears, panic attacks. Thanks for sharing.

[rnuff]

so powerfully deep, Very emotional as well. Like the decriptiveness, brought out more feelings.

[Erica Marie]

Thank you :)

[bpark]

this is a beautiful poem. I relate with it a lot. Very good job on this.
the way you describe the panic attacks, and really your struggles with mental illness, was something so much more real than I've seen in a long time. it's hard to describe having depression, or anxiety, or whatever the hell it is everyone has, but you've done a beautiful job of it here.

[Erica Marie]

Thank you! I know, dealing with anxiety is very difficult :(

[bpark]

when you get a sec check out
http://rantedtirades.blogspot.com/
let me know what you think

[Cupcake.]

This is such an accurate depiction of panic attacks, something I suffer from as well. You have quite the talent.

[Erica Marie]

It's a very difficult thing to deal with, thank you for your compliment. :)

[X]

This is awesome. I love the moments in which you are inside your own head in italics. The imagery is haunting and beautiful, scary and serene. Well done.

X

[ms. barrie]

this is so beautifully, poignantly penned. i love your use of enriched imagery weaved through out this. your words so eloquently conveying your struggles with panic attacks. wonderful poem, i find the fluidity of this write absolutely amazing! great job, pen on :)

[Erica Marie]

(: Thank you!

[ms. barrie]

you welcome..wow! WC fixed the comment review thingie, well wonders never cease!

[Erinne S.]

You wrote this so well. The portrayal of your panic attacks were easily pictured with your vivid writing. :)
Well done!

~Erinne

[Erica Marie]

Thank you :)

[Carson Scott]

You are a really talented writer! Good Job:)

[Erica Marie]

Thank you so much:)