Today I sang and laughed with gleeBut it was not the Christmas cheer
That made me so relieved you see
It was my own, and secret, fear
Amid the singing crowds I slipped
In to a private, sacred space
Alone - and trembling I quickly stripped
And searched to seek my own disgrace.
But what I found was that red bliss
That for weeks I had been searching for
The evidence I'd sorely missed
In absence that branded me, a w***e.
I have not prayed to God for much
But for this gift I thank you desperately
It wasn't the worth the fleeting touch
I could not have faced his pregnancy.