Woven Inside

stitched on my sleeve.

Second chances have been misued,

the lost and fragile have been abused,

love is less faithful these days,

please don't judge when in this phase,

 

we were meant to live and breath,

lost in this zone-wove in my sleeve,

up above the sky's blue clouds,

lost in the maze of many crowds,

 

failed attempts to live in me,

wove inside my eyes to see,

how wonderful it is to seek,

the rust-pipe's never ending leak,

 

a prom night is a time to remember,

the winter's fragile cold december,

if you could only see me now,

you would clap--I'd have to bow,

 

to show you what it's like for me,

with eyes to look and want to see,

Pop Tarts are another thing,

bees are painful--much to sting,

 

how wonderful it is to show the way,

if only every person's got a word to say,

to show how it is and what we should do,

I loved what we were--if only you knew,

 

if you noticed these kind bits of your life,

maybe your arms wouldn't be cut with a knife,

I love how you can forget what's woven inside,

because the person you were has already died.

 

 

Author's Note

i hope it spreads a meaning.

Reviews

[Dani California]

Very well done! Depending on the reader, this can be interpreted many ways which is what makes it great. I see memories - good/bad and regret of a relationship no longer; reference to bees and pop tarts are perhaps memories only the reader would understand, but add a bit of mystery to the poem. Nice. The last stanza is powerful and can be taken literally or metaphorically. Either way, it's powerful and well written.

Excellent job! I'm glad Daniel forwarded this to me :)

[J]

This feels like a lamentation of a relationship which suffered a painful demise. I wonder if references to a prom, pop tarts, etc. carry significant memories when it was all still so good. I do hope your reference to cut arms is not what it seems to infer.

Very oblique but Interesting write. Nice job.

[None]

Very deep and meaningful. I like the alternating colors as well, adding emphasis. Thank you to Forest Green for sending this over. I'm so happy he did. Excellent poem!

[Forest Green]

It certainly has meaning...some of the lines are too ethereal for me to understand...but that's not saying it's a fault of the poem at all. I'm not the best at determining nuanced meanings.

Amazing poem...the last line adds a great closing thought.

Good work! I'll send this to a couple friends.

Daniel

[Mariah]

It does spread a meaning, but I'm sure it has different meaning for every person. I especially enjoyed the end.


"I love how you can forget what's woven inside,

because the person you were has already died."

[sherie carter]

i really like this.
you are an excellent poet.
keep up the good work!