[untitled]

idk

 

 I grew up in a world with no order.

never being able to sleep

got me a sleep disorder

 grew up in a world with no father.

never bothered me

cause i had my gmother

grew up with no reason to look forward.

always told to look straight forward

f**k that

never can do that.

cause i...

always got someone holding me back

never had someone have my back

me against the world with my

eyes glued shut. and

my mouth not attached.

now reach back

i'm 13

and i met you

it was love at 1st sight

i new it was true

now skip that

i'm 16

and i've lost you

I never thought life could be so cruel 
but i've been screwed.

my mind so askew

I wish god help me

but i'm already so close to the end

i can't count on him to come through.

so i'm going to let go but before i do

i just want you to know that

I love you and the day i saw you

was the day my life begun

now its time for me to look up to the light

and pull the trigger....

now good bye world.

now dont pretend to miss me.

i stayed true to my word

I loved you to the end.

so dont worry for me.

No more blues

so no more worries.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Author's Note

ignore the grammar problems and what not.

Reviews

[Amanda Hope]

This is really good, like another person said I could definetly see this as a rap. I like how you take us through the life and all the struggles. I hope you dont see pulling the trigger as the real answer. Life may be twisted but you have to experience the bad to appreciate the good.

[kaycee]

i really enjoyed this. it flowed so nicely and i could see this as a rap. it was musical.
the second and third lines were my favorite. i can definitely relate to the feelings of hopelessness that lead someone to question whether life is even worth living and i have found that things always seem to get worse before they get better. i hope that you can see life's crazy beauty in that way, too and keep on living it.

-kaycee

[Rella]

Trip- You're a really good writer. You write about those things that are just swept under the rug. The s****y times and understanding that the world doesn't just revolve to make you happy. It's good to know that there is someone else in this world that cares about the little people, like you and me.

About your ex, you can't say that you love her and wish that you were dead. If you really love her, you will do everything in your power to have her back. Don't just sit there and wish you were dead because you can't have her. You can't say shes gone forever though, you'll never know.

Read my poems, they have a lot in common with yours.

[QuietPoet]

Hey Trip.This was a very deep writing. Very sad too. Pulling the trigger is not the answer.. You will make it. You have your WHOLE life ahead of you and you will run to holes and troubles, but you will get out. You will be alright.

[Debra Stevens Edwards (..]

This is a sad piece and to think that you are only sixteen. God can always help if you open your heart and let him in. He is love and light. What is it that makes young people think death is the answer? I don't know
why you write as though there is no hope in your world. To ignore grammar problems is not learning from your mistakes. As I remember being sixteen meant I knew it all. LOL. Good Luck.
Debby