A Piece of Me

A Story by Beautiful Brat

An essay I wrote when I was 18. I won't change anything from it because this is who I was at that age: spelling errors, grammar, words, etc.

To stand on a weathered, worn out stage were some of my own favorite bands have once performed for a large amount of people, is just one of my many dreams. I want to write a book based on a fantasy, that will branch into a series, a series that kids my own age will brag about. I want to learn to forgive and forget, live and learn, to have the ability to stop and smell the roses. My name is Jassa Rae, and I want to be a successful Rockstar. Or well…just Successful.

    “You can do Anything!” well, that’s what my mother said. She continues to tell me that little piece of nothing whenever I tell her my “one-of-many-dreams”. Started in Grade School. When I started to show my artistic abilities on paper with a pencil or paint brush. At that young age I was able to turn anything into a piece of art. My source? My undying imagination. It stuck with me like a loyal dog all the way through Grade School but slowly started to wither away once I walked into Middle School. Yes, Middle School, when the judging starts and when I started to hide my talents, only showing them in Art class. My loyal dog, now in a rusty cage by choice.

    That was 6 years ago. Divorce, Puberty, Heart break and a lot of trust issues have happened since than. From 7th grade I watched my, once friends, from Grade School slowly grow as I was, only to change from the once innocence every child holds to a sense of curiosity. But being to busy watching the world change and grow, I started to neglect my own thoughts and knowing of my own self changing. The once “BFF’s” turned to fashion, drugs, and other things that I also feared. They were changing into something that wasn’t them. Luckily I wasn’t tempted to change with them. Instead, I turned to music, and slowly opened myself up to discover what I had neglected. I was ready to learn about me. The Real me.

    I’ve always enjoyed music, and music has always enjoyed me. I was born with music, always wondering what made melody and how you could manifest it into a different sound. I’ve taken classes for guitar and classes for Choir but learned that I work better alone than with a large group of people. Now, I still sing, post some videos up online to get some feedback from people that don’t know the real me, just yet anyway, and I still pluck a few chords when I feel I want to pursue it in my free time. But till I break away from the self conscience part that seems to have a rather strong hold on me, I spend time learning and discovering new types of music. Though no matter how far I travel in my discovery I never stray to far from my Rock ’n’ Roll home.

    So here I am, the Real me. I’m not hiding behind a shadowy face or a fake smile. I speak with full emotion and give what I have. I am balanced with myself, spiritually and mentally. I am content with myself and my future goals. I do not want to be someone “else” anymore, I want to use my own legs to walk My path.

    People say that it takes Years of experience with life lessons to find your true self. I’m only 18 and I can safely say that I have found my True self. She was here all along just hidden for awhile, giving me clues from time to time. I have learned the hardship’s and goals I set for myself. I have learned to Forgive and Forget. I am still Alive and learning with each passing day, and yes, I have that ability to stop and smell the roses.