awkward

love my imagination!

we walk into the theatre,

its awkward at first,

we've known each other for years,

but it's never felt like this.

 

we settle into the plush seats,

and the lights dim,

neither of us really want to see this movie,

but thats what we get for being spontaneous.

 

i carelessly hang my hand over the armrest,

you don't get the hint.

i start to shiver,

your eyes are drawn to my hand,

it's shaking; it's cold.

you lace your fingers through mine

in a desperate attempt to warm them.

 

i sink lower into my seat,

so that i can gently rest my head on your shoulder.

"you're breathing really fast," you whisper to me,

i manage to breathe out a "hah, yeah."

 

before i know it, the credits are rolling.

i couldn't remember the plot of the movie if i tried.

we get up to leave the theatre, but your hand never leaves mine.

 

outside,

we run into a group of your friends.

your hand immediately drops mine,

and rushes up to push the hair out of your face.

nervous habit, i think.

i try not to be obvious, but my face falls

the minute that i can no longer feel your hand on mine.

 

you bring me home, and you pretend not to notice.

you don't want to think that you did anything wrong,

even though you're sure that you did.

 

when you don't get out of the car,

and your goodbye is empty,

thats when i realize,

that we're not going to make it,

because i will never be enough for you.

Reviews

[Cortney Lynn]

this is unbelievably truthful. everyone only rights love stories and poems with happy endings but that really only rarely happens in real life. this is true teenage romance.


it reminds me a lot of things that have happened in the past.

[Ben Walton]

Sad!

I almost hit "submit" then i went "She's going to go ' 'sad' is all you have to say?' "

So here is a winded response.

i've noticed, a lot of the times, when you write your phrasing is very awkward, sometimes you use awkward vocabulary, cliche words, stuff like that. You don't really do it here (despite what the title may imply). it flows (what is the past tense of flow?) nicely, and read like a memory someone hates going back to but always does because the first half is the good part.

You know?

love ya gabbi.

[Loner]

I really like where your poem led.

[Tina Kline]

A very good poem. It made me feel sad, that's how good it is written. The pain and disapointment comes across very powerfully. Like I said, well written, it captured my interest from the start to the finish. Well done!

Tina