When I See Her

When I see her, I feel a blade go through my heart

I see her and wish she was mine, and I hers

I wonder how she thinks, when her eyes lay on me

I wonder if she worries, when I am not near

I wonder if her breath is caught at a touch, as it is with me

 

As she claims another’s love, the blade poised on my heart

I prepare to die, without a cry, with her in my heart

I remember something in my wallet, and open it in my hand

It is what she wrote, when on a whim I asked, “what if I died?”

She said that if I committed suicide, that she would cry

 

Knowing this, I dropped the blade, to clatter at my feet

Just for her, I live on, to keep her safe with me.

I would wait until she was ready, if ready she would be

I would protect her and watch her, until my days were done

Or until she decides I am right, and two become one

 

I will only love her, this one girl, until there comes along

A little one, whom we birth, that I will love the same

I will watch them both, and care for them the same

The day the little one is born, go and get a gun

And when they need me, be there, so I can be the one

 

What I would do, if she was suddenly taken from me

I cannot say, but that losing her would lead to lots of grief

I feel that if I lost her, even before she was mine

That my tears would form a new great lake, full of only brine

Maybe her death would make it, where nothing held me back

As I prepare to take away, the one thing to her I can give.

Reviews

[Gaelan_Hamilton]

Very nice poem - clear structure, well presented, regular rhyming pattern and all that other clever poetry guff!

The theme and its portrayal too is excellent, you've beautifully captured the emotions that your character feels for this girl and enabled the reader to empathise with them. Very well done!

[Wyatt]

thank you! it is my first poem I've written.

[ROXANE DORSEY]

impressive and very very nice. thanks for sharing your talents.

[Alex Ryder]

I love the way you talk about your feelings towards her.