Late Casualties

Pain from war. Not my story, I am fine

Many go to war,

fewer numbers return.

The pain after returning

is hard to repair.

Missing friends not on the flight.

Memories of fighting,

of death.

Bodies burned,

mutilated and abused,

residing still in the minds eye.

Go on with life,

going forward to live that dream.

But in the dark of night,

demons come out,

displaying in your dreams the

vision still,

war and death.

You cannot hide the burden

carried of lost friends,

that saved your life.

So now you wonder,

why was it me and not them?

Time goes on

but the burden grows heavy

as the mind grows dark with guilt.

Until the weight is too much

to go on living a beautiful life not deserved.

It will end tonight as I cannot bare the pain beyond this point.

Author's Note

No I am not hurting myself. Only a reflection of thoughts as I remember family members and friends since WWII and the pain many came home with. I wish not to offend or lessen anyone's service time or the pain they may suffer.

Reviews

[LastMonth]

First off,

I like the way you wrote this. The format is good. The insertion of 'War and Death' in a short blimp amidst the stanzas give it the rightful potency and splash within your poem. You put it on a pedestal and that is the correct decision to make.

When it comes to post trauma, it's a fickle subject. Sometimes people don't quite understand how harshly they react to something until it's right in their face. I visit graveyards quite a bit. Some less then I ought to. Nothing can really prepare you for some rows, some of them speak volumes. You think to yourself 'I'm ok, I'm ok, I'm ok.' And then a single tombstone just shatters your false resolve and crumbles you to dust.

Your poem is both important and beautiful.
Thank you.

[Willard Wells]

Thank you so much for taking the time to review my words. I am glad you understand the pain that so many suffer.

[andrew mitchell]

willard, a soldier gets 40'000 a year salary per year, a retired politician gets 174,000 dollars a year for life indexed, a retired prime minister in Australia gets Over 250,000 dollars a year for life , a pensioner gets 12,000 a year.in Australia. We are sending the wrong people to war. Yes post traumatic syndrome is common as is amputees from war and they do not get what they deserve. . Its so Wrong! A sad but true right

[Willard Wells]

Thanks for the time and comments on my work. You are correct.

[...]

Dear poet, this is touching beyond words...and we are about to go to war again... :(

[Willard Wells]

No we are not about to go to war again..................the world has always been at war throughout history from before the "Crusades", and fighters have come home with this pain for all times.

For today to me this is another mental health crisis in our country. Our prisons, streets and homeless camps are filled with these men and woman along with others that have become the waste of our society.

Thank you so much for visiting my work and commenting. If any of my response seemed harsh, it was just my passion on the subject and not your words. Appreciate the time.

[...]

Your passion is remarkable, sir. You are right, we have always been at war. I worked in a prison for 17 years. Then I got out and worked with prisoners on the other side trying to stay out. I have been both, well off, and homeless...I've seen both sides. Never had to watch a man die that saved my life, and hope I never have to feel that kind of pain. Most of the older members of my family, were in the service, including my father. He still don't talk much about it, sir. You have not been harsh at all, just passionate :)

[Willard Wells]

Your father not talking about it speaks volumes and many others have told me the same thing. He won't talk about it. Some, like this piece, keep it in and no one knows until the end.

I don't know your father or his age, but it doesn't seem to go away and sits dormant in some. As we age we start reviewing our lives and sometimes that is when it happens. Hug your dad and keep him close. There is only one of him.
Thanks.

[Valentine]

This brought to mind some of my older brothers talks with my dad about what had happened on the front line. Years later I find he never told his wife or children any of these horrific tales. Yet I heard him say these things. Valentine

[Willard Wells]

It's a secret that needs to be more open and a better understood. It is a dark world that many suffer in, after battles. Thank you as always for your kind words and time in visiting my work.

[R Smith]

deep and intense Will, very excellent poetry my friend :)

[Willard Wells]

Thank you so much. I had a bit of hesitation in putting this out. I did not want to offend anyone that served or has the challenges. I had some outside approval before putting out. Another one of the many mental health issues facing the world. I appreciate you time and comments.

[Workvio]

Those who speak of the glories of war, usually have not seen the true battlefront of war, or else they would know without doubt that there are no glories in war and any glories spoken of are not glory but gory ... Both my dad and stepdad served in the Korean Conflict ... My stepdad was haunted by nightmares most all his days and one did not walk into the bedroom and touch him while he slept, or they would find themselves handily flying across the room Jujitsu style. My dad refused to watch war movies at all. I also lost several friends in the Vietnam War ... I was an idiot who thought he wanted to go, but my allergies caused the draft board to turn me down ... Our family is blessed to have a number of young men who have served in Iraq & Afghanistan as army rangers ... One in particular served in Afghanistan since right after 911 up until about 2 years ago. He left a young man full of zeal, fervor, and patriotism ... He return a man disillusioned and angry that his own country was guilty of setting their own soldiers up to be killed, not just once but on a regular basis ... Having lost some of his closest brethren, though he is a natural born fighting man, he finally opted to leave the military service in seeing no justifiable cause to lose his life for a country that only viewed him as expendable ... More importantly, he had no wish to be asked to take up arms against American citizens here in the states in obeying a commander in chief such as Obama ... Your poem hits the nail on the head with a topic that is almost impossible to understand ... I try to understand, but I will never truly understand what it is like to go to war, to see, witness, and do the things that war requires, and return home to live with oneself having survived when all those other life deserving men perished ... In speaking of this, this poem reminds me of a friend of mine who served in Vietnam ... He was a White boy from Mississippi, full of racial hatred and prejudice as taught him in growing up ... He sat down and shared with me recently that twice in Vietnam he was wounded and was a dead man by all rights, his White friends at a distance watching him but too frightened to come to his aid ... This man told me that in both instances he would be dead today, except a Black man came running to his aid, risking his own life to save a White boy from Mississippi ... The men became his true best friends in arms ... He shared that on returning home for leave that they would each go their own way, because in those days it was not to be accepted for a White man and a Black man to associate together as friends, regardless of circumstances ... That is such a damn shame ... I am hoping to get this friend to share more in detail about his experiences in Vietnam so I can write his story in opening eyes to the foolish stupidity of racial prejudice towards any color or complexion ... Well done, superbly well done ...

[Willard Wells]

Thank you Marvin for taking time to read my work and comment. It is a part of the entire mental issues that we have in the country. There are complains about the homeless and many are mentally ill and in addition we have the homeless vets which also have a form of mental illness. Like you have said we need more openness about these afflictions.

[Workvio]

Yes, my friend, as you so aptly said the other day, folks will never understand 100% without personally experiencing these afflictions as issues in their own life, and I whole heartedly agree ... Yet, I also strongly believe that folks will never understand unless we continue to place examples before them so that per chance they may glean a tiny bit better understanding ... Not to cram mental health down folks throats as what some would call an agenda, but to speak and share openly of the things people with mental health issues go through each and every day in a normal world where they are anything but normal ... America has one of the highest mental health percentages per our population than most any country in the world ... There must be a reason for this, a root cause, but we will never find solutions or answers unless folks begin to understand that being mentally ill is not a hush hush stigmatized affliction like having an STD was in the 1920's or something ... It is time to take the wraps off those who are wounded with mental illness and allow healing in the open air to begin ... This poem is a fine example of removing the wraps, that healing may commence ...

[Willard Wells]

I think the increase in mental illness is worldwide and the increased numbers have more to to with a greater populous and the % maybe the same, We stopped in the late '60's to early '70 treating mental illness and opened all facilities and let the patient out. Due to the poor conditions and treatment at that time this may have been for the best, but having solution before opening the doors would have been a much better solution. As it is now we have homeless and more with mental illness across our world.

[Rudi J.P. Lejaeghere]

Glad I worte the description in the beginning. It's indeed a fact that at night our demons come out, I think they live in the shadows...of our mind. Well done, Willard. :) Rudi

[Willard Wells]

Thank you kind sir. I have seen for many years and from many battle those that suffer and the many more that could not hang on. Greatly appreciate the visit and comments.

[Rudi J.P. Lejaeghere]

My pleasure, Willard, have a good day. :) Rudi

[Coyote Poetry]

I agree.
"You cannot hide the burden
carried of lost friends,
that saved your life.
So now you wonder,
why was it me and not them."
My best friend of 12 year in the service was killed on 26 August 2004. We raised our kids together. Some days war can catch-up with you. Thank you Willard for sharing the powerful words.
Coyote

[Willard Wells]

Thank you for your kind words. My fear after I completed it, was that I would offend some past or current service person with some army in some country and that is not me intent.

This is just another of the mental health issues facing the world and we need to get a grip on it. So much killing and some could be reduced if we took care of those with extreme mental health issues.

Again thank you for your time and comments.

[Coyote Poetry]

You are welcome Willard.