Change of Course

Sometimes we get sidetracked onto The Highway of Wrong Intentions, and when we feel the wind smacking us in the face, we are quickly jerked back to reality.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Author's Note

CHANGE OF COURSE!


Stupidity reigns supreme when I act without thinking!
When I stumble back into the good sense of reality,
I ask, "Just how did I get caught up in deceit's web--
Really, just how gullible can a person with a brain be?”

I was stuck on a highway traveling the wrong way south,
With my car heading northward too few times.
Going backwards I was, wheel of responsibility twisted round,
And caught up in a pocket of loose nickels and dimes.

Bags of discretion were packed and thrown into the back seat.
I was on a freeway with the cold wind stinging my face,
When I discovered an unintended passenger riding along.
I had to slam on the brakes and stop the wrong way race.

I've corrected my course to reality of life's road.
The steering wheel is headed in the common sense direction.
No veering off onto a dark, side road of stupidity again,
As I’ve paid too high a price to realize value of correction.

Oh yes! I’m now cruising along on the Superhighway of Life!

Sheila, Ms. Lady of Corrected Love

Reviews

[The Rock And Roll Cowbo..]

LOL... such a creative and fun piece but with so much truth... unlike the road life doesn't have a map so sometimes we thin we are heading down the right road till it leads to a dead end... we just have to remember that road so we don't head down it again. You have a way of entertaining and delivering a lesson, that is talent.

[Iota]

It is always way to easy to get off course, maybe we hope the new direction will get us to where we want to be much quicker or maybe the scenery will be more enjoyable but having the ability to see warning flags and to then react to them is a greater gift in life because we are all duped once or twice in this road called life. Excellent write.

[Twilight]

This rather impressive, Sheila! Thankyou, for entering it in my Contest, "FREE SPIRITS"! Clearly, you appear to have taken into account the entry criteria. The last line is uplifting, ".....crusin' along on the superhighway of life!" Indeed, the word "super" sounds quite positive! Also, there is the obvious metaphor, of our lives being a car journey.

Interestingly, some fo the wording is very exacting or precise. Just as a motorist, has to be precise about his behaviour on the open road! For example, leaning too hard on the accelerator could be a hazard!

Now, I also was quite taken with the first visual image which Sheila has displayed with her poem. It is of a woman, with brightly-coloured hair, a curious complexion and confused expression on her face. This reminded me a little, of an Andy Warhol creation!

The Author's Note is fine, although I had no need to be informed as to the basic meaning of this poem. In some ways, this is also a rather contemporary piece - in view of the fact that it draws attention to the great importance of driving in modern society. Also, the contemporary pace of modern living, can be perceived as a fast journey. Thankyou kindly, Sheila Kline!

[Lena M. P.]

Love this imaginative piece. Made me smile and think back to times I drove on that same highway. Loved the concepts of driving south but heading north and also the bags of desertion thrown in the back seat. Wonder analogy.

[Mark]

How true, that so many of us allow life (the car) to take us where we would not go, without actively participating in the steering of that life at all! Gratefully, some see that they've voluntarily yielded up control, and seize the reins back ( a mixed metaphor?) in time!

[R J Askew]

Love the first verse. This sums up one or two situations -- excitements -- I've got myself into only to then shift rapidly down to calm again! And yet I know that I will be gunning along excitement highway again at some point with the inevitable tyre smoke to follow! And there's me driving a Toyota Picnic with 'family fun vehicle' in little type below the logo on the back door.

[Taylor Maye]

this poem described my life in middle school lol how sad is that, i really like it though (the poem) lol

[Valentine]

Sweetie, with all that you are going through now it is a wonder that you managed to get the vehicle turned around to go in the right direction..I think there are times in all of our lives we have felt like this or are going to,,nice write..love and God bless..prayers..valentine

[S. Allison (Ferrante) S..]

Creative piece...I like your overall message. Thank you for sharing!

[Michael X]

I love this, you have an exceptional way with rhyme, and in many ways your words speak to the masses
the way the heart can identify with the meaning, and that being the idea of traveling on the road of life,
the knowledge in your words have a way of showing what impotance holds in being carefree
and living for the moment without resctrictions, showing how placing the idea of freedom and fun
above all is what living is all about in many ways, I think you've captured this aspect by the skilled use of imagery and I really like the graphics incorporating an added sense of detail. Wonderful job.

First and foremost; you have a few spelling errors in the first stanza, "Stupudity" and "deceipt's". They should be "Stupidity" and "deceit's" respectively.

Those out of the way, I first thought this was a non-rhyming poem until I reached down to about the third stanza. You typically have issues with rhythm with your poems, and that combined with the ABCB scheme and rather long lines, you end up creating the feel of a non-rhyming poem. This isn't a particularly good effect, and something you should probably try to revise.

The overall theme is quite... Vivid would not be the right word. It's an easy to picture situation, cruising down the darkened alleys of life, but I would not describe it as vivid. This is not necessarily a bad thing; I feel it fits the message you're conveying. The images are there, but at first are just a smooth blur going over the windscreen in your mind until you slam on the breaks and take a good look at where you are. Afterwards, everything stays in focus. This is how I imagined your poem and I must say I like the effect. It reminds me a little bit of a song actually; Sleep by Story Of The Year. I don't presume you'll like the song but you may find the time to listen to it (pay particular attention to the lyrics).

If you could only work on the rhythm such that the poem reads smoothly, the overall effect would be greater. As the poem itself is bumpy, you don't quite get the feeling of "gently cruising the streets" as you don't slip into the rhythm.

It's a good poem overall, one I'd recommend that others read.