10/21/12 Dear Blue Eyes

10/21/12 Dear Blue Eyes

A Poem by Aly
"

Another Dear Blue Eyes Poem

"
He has these deadly harmonic blue eyes.
He stared into my eyes, as he shook my hand.
For one minute I believe he cared.
But then I realized my mother was right there.
He doesn't care
He was just being polite
A cute boy
With Ocean Blue Eyes
Why does he matter to me?
I'm over him
I'm over this
I know it's never going to happen
But those Blue Eyes always captured my eye
He sings and dances
He's smart and tough
The opposite of me
But he could be anything indeed.

© 2012 Aly


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Reviews

One way love is always painful.

Posted 11 Years Ago


Aly

11 Years Ago

Indeed.
Nice read here to where you into someone thinking hey wouldn't that be something, but finding to know hes only nice for a reason nice description upon the eyes being harmonic to ocean blue. Nice read here as always keep writing fellow writer.

Posted 11 Years Ago


Aly

11 Years Ago

Thank you! Thanks for reading and reviewing! :)
kelvin

11 Years Ago

You're very welcome
So lovely to have a crush on someone but they don't even care. Love this

Posted 11 Years Ago


Aly

11 Years Ago

That's the story of my life :)
And well probably any other girl's life haha
Carolann Dowsett

11 Years Ago

Well yeah definitely the story of mine too lol
Well written. Simple and descriptive. I had to read it because I get many compliments about my blue eyes.

Posted 11 Years Ago


Aly

11 Years Ago

Lol. Thanks for reviewing.
Levi Levin

11 Years Ago

Your welcome :)
You captured this well, the feeling the ambivalence , the loving.

Posted 11 Years Ago


Aly

11 Years Ago

Thank you
An interesting piece about infatuation and possibly unrequited love. it is well written and my only suggestion, given that the word eyes appears on multiple occassions is to replace the last one in the line fifth from last with 'heart'. Perhaps use irisis instead of eyes in the first line.

Posted 11 Years Ago


Aly

11 Years Ago

ahh ok. Yes I was very deeply infatuation with him, but thank you for reviewing and reading.
Nice job. Good flow, conveyed an overall emotion, and made me feel like I was there, shaking his hand too. WHILE you left me one detail, and an action so I could imagine it, but imagine it all how I would like it to be. Good job, again

Posted 11 Years Ago


Aly

11 Years Ago

It is scary but thank you and I encourage you to post your writing on here :)
Thanks for revie.. read more
David the writer

11 Years Ago

Thank you for the encouragement, but I think I've posted enough...atleast for now. Np, I feel I shou.. read more
Aly

11 Years Ago

ah ok. Lol. Yes it does indeed.
Nice. I love the way you show what's going on behind the man's eyes. The way you keep coming back to them. You worked the repetition well, which in my opinion is hard to do. Good job!

Posted 11 Years Ago


Aly

11 Years Ago

Thank you :)

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308 Views
8 Reviews
Rating
Added on December 31, 2012
Last Updated on December 31, 2012
Tags: Hate, Crush, Moving On

Author

Aly
Aly

Somewhere in the Land of Potato's :), ID



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