Violet

there is a brother sister romance here, so don't comment on the weirdness it just happened....i thought of this on the plane to Florida and this is one of my Lost Manuscripts

“Can you do this?”

She nods, remembering the last time she’d heard those words. Under different circumstances she would have found his accusation funny, but not tonight. She had a job to do – there was no room for self-incriminating doubt.

“You sure?”

“I’m fine, Holland.” She snapped, masking her worry with her usual indifference.

Holland started to say something, then stopped. He hesitated, then lifted the chain from his neck. He dropped it in her hand – it was surprisingly heavy, and felt like cold marble under her fingertips. She looked down at it, rubbing the pendant between her thumb and forefinger. It warmed considerably, and she saw a flash of amber reflect from it.

She nodded again, and cracked one of her rare smiles. “Thanks.”

He eyed her warily, his keen eyes flicking from her eyes to the pendant and back. “Ok,” he sighed, “Just be sure that he puts it on you. No one else can-”

“Activate the compulsion charm, bond the magic’s, blah blah blah.” She moved closer, tracing her finger over his arm. He shivered. “Just do your job, all right?”

She reached out to caress his cheek. He grabbed her hand, pulling her into him. His face was drawn, but his emerald arms were dark with longing. His arms wrapped around her, locking her in his embrace. She knew how much he wanted her. He desired her with all he had; his heart was hers. His devotion went far beyond standard brotherly affection.

“All right,” he murmured, his breath tickling her face. In his eyes, behind the lust was forbidden blackness. Hurt. Betrayal. Unforgivable. It saddened her to see him like this – in love only because of their mothers’ spell. But hopefully this would be over soon. If not, well, then it was his own fault.

Wasn’t it…

He leaned forward and kissed her on the cheek. His lips were warm and soft against her skin. She shuddered with pleasure and hugged him tighter. She would never admit it, but she loved being in his arms. They made her feel safe. Protected. Secure, and hidden away from the world. She loved him as her brother, her twin – not the lovesick monster their mother had turned him into. Again she felt her heart respond, but she pushed the thoughts away. She should feel nothing for him. It was weakness.

Too soon it was over. He released her, and smiled a smile that didn’t touch his eyes. She supposed he wanted her dead – then he would finally be freed. Sooner or later, he’d get his wish. You’re his enemy, she reminded herself, though it was hard to believe. So act like it.

She felt her eyes turn from amber to black, then to silver. Lifeless. Cold. Apathetic. Nothing he doesn’t deserve, she thought bitterly.

She glared at him, hating herself for it, and hating him for forcing this on her, and walked away.

He pulled her back by her wrist. His eyes were wider, and more dilated – dark green, not black, she noted with relief. Of course – how could he stay angry at her?

He leaned close to her, making her breath hitch at this intimate contact. She stared into his eyes, transfixed by how bright they were.

“I’ll miss you,” he whispered, his voice ringing with the sincerity she so loved. His eyes were true, too – though she sensed an underlying message – a warming of sorts. She thought it out, then winced at the double meaning.

She touched the hand holding her wrist, looking down at their entwined hands. His fingers ran along the thin, barely there scars, and squeezed tighter. His other hand smoothed her hair, brushing it away from her face. Slowly he lifted her chin, so that they were staring face to face again. “I’ll miss you,” he said again.

She gulped, her throat burning as tears threatened. She would truly miss him, too, despite what their mother had done. No, she decided, staring into his innocent eyes, he is not responsible for what happened to him. I am.

Slowly, carefully she reached out her hand again, and traced along his jaw, and down to where his shirt met his collarbone. She needed him, always had – but she could never admit it. He knew she couldn’t. So why push their luck?

Now she knew why – because he had no choice. He couldn’t let her walk away. Neither could she.

Her voice sounded strangled, but she had to say it. Say something at least. “I’ll…miss you too,” she choked out, wanting to bite her tongue.

She would’ve given anything to suck back her words when she saw the look that overshadowed his eyes. Pain. Abandon. Almost disbelief, but in a defeated kind of acceptance. The same look he had when their mother had turned him, cutting off his powers of magic for good.

His magic…the spiritual powers the likes of which their mother deemed long extinct, thanks to certain dark wizards. But she believed him, as did their Uncle. Thank god he wasn’t totally alone.

And it was for this very magic that she was fighting for. So she had to succeed – no matter what, she could not let her brother suffer any more. Ever.

She stepped back, feeling her own hurt and sadness emanating from her in strong, nauseous waves. And, just like that she turned, and ran away down the hill. She clutched the pendant to her chest, feeling it vibrate and pulse against her. It gave her little comfort.

She reached the forest, and collapsed just inside the tree line. She sunk to the bottom of an aged spruce, feeling its harsh and ragged roots scratch at her back. Good, she thought through the haze of emotions that clouded her mind. I deserve it. All of it.

She lost track of time, and all mentions of where she was. She was stuck somewhere in her own polluted, sick mind, thinking of Holland and what she’d done to him…it wasn’t fair. None of it was. So why couldn’t it change?

This snapped her from her darker thoughts. She remembered the blade she carried, and reached down to get it. The handle felt icy cold. It was when she grasped it in both shaky hands, but could not see it, that she remembered where she was. Nighttime in the Emerald forest. Cold, crisp air whipping her face, punishing her for all her devious crimes. How she had betrayed both Holland and Gabriel’s trust…

She ran her fingers along the cool, jagged blade, feeling its coarse edge from the dried bloodstains she hadn’t bothered to wash off from her last cut. The blade sluiced into her forefinger, and a moment later she felt the warm liquid trickle down her hand. She laughed, deciding it was funny. To suffer, to release all the pain she’d been feeling. It was wondrous. If only it could last…

She cut a bit deeper, gasping in pleasure as she felt the sting. She concentrated on it, thinking of nothing but her physical hurt, trying to forget what had happened, all that she had done wrong. It came easier with time, she knew, and in no time the sensation consumed her mind.

Soon fatigue began to win her over, and finally, she slumped deeper against the tree, curling up among the roots, and fell asleep. Dreams of Holland in the good days wandered her mind for awhile, and she even smiled once, just a quirk of her lips.

But then the visions began to take a deeper meaning, and her mind forced its way past her mental blockage she’d stored up. She fought it though, but vainly. She knew she was being overpowered, but she couldn’t force herself to wake. She was too far gone.

Then she saw him. She remembered. Gabriel…

© 2009 fallendemonofmercy

Author's Note

3/23/09
3/30/09

My Review

Would you like to review this Story?
Login | Register

Reviews

Katchzen

This starts out really great, and maybe it's just because I'm tired, but I'm not really sure what happened. It seems like after she sets out with the compulsion charm, she falls asleep in the forest and remembers this "Gabriel" person just before she falls unconscious. What happens to Holland? What happens to her and their mother and Gabriel?