Fatal Attraction

Team Renfield- 1

Haunting, her whispers come

Nightly, in hinted tongue

Tread not my land of wonders

Stay there where you belong

With each new nightly message

She dares, but tempts some more

With every new warning said

Enticing me to explore

Unveil, one night did she

Her transparent, lucid form

With cloudy eyes so white

Like visions of a storm

She then walked away

I followed close behind

Indifferent to her warnings

Her words still in my mind

Feeling my pursuit of her she

turned , her move untoward

fool, you should have listened

I have no truths for you, but knowledge

On this fatal edge of my sword

Reviews

[Eilis]

Great atmosphere to this poem. It reminded me of Nathaniel Hawthorne and his explorations of the wilderness. The sense that everything has a spirit and can impact the human being's spiritual and mental health. And then there's also the Hester Prynne's who are touched deeply by the wilderness of human communities and remain on the margins trying to find their (new) place.

I liked the dynamic. It could be forbidden love, infatuation, or some kind of internal battle. That openness is appealing in poetry. Nice work.

[Wondering Mind]

Thank you very much for taking time to provide such feedback. Much appreciated!

[Unspoken poet]

Wow this is simply amazing! I enjoyed the imagery in this well written write. This is well written....

[FJ Davis]

Warnings are often an almost irresistible enticement to the truly curious; frequently hard-winning them the painful, belated realization that they should not have allowed themselves to be enticed--to be manipulated.
Besides, truth should be the goal. Without a conviction that truth exists, and the presence of a seeking, discerning consciousness, all the knowledge in the world will not yield the smallest truth--though I doubt there really are any small truths.
Many valuable metaphorical applications, WM.
Well penned!

[Mockingbird]

should have heeded her warning. she must've been so enchanting you were just compelled to follow her. like a siren. but all it did was lead you to your demise.

[Robin]

excellent ~

[Poetic Beauty]

Wow death by a ghost's sword. that would truly be and ending to finalize it all.

[Lightfalls]

This sounds like a fantasy that breaks through into something real...almost moving along that line between what is true, and what we want to be true. Somethings you know, but only after it's too late. A very good poem this is.

[tshigg]

I like the flow of it. Makes you want to know what happens next.

[Marie Harrison]

Cool! I like this write. It does have a haunting feel to it! She sounds like a tease!~

[Norma M Sutton]

Nice. I like the ending.