Taking Place of

I am drunk so I lost my attention to this, I will come back

I was a girl that dissolved like salt
just look back and i'll be gone
in the water murky to you,
reflecting the stupid quarter moon.

I smile at the blank stuff
its easier to make it all up(audaciously),
sparkling objects take the place
of dull habits 

They all catch my eye
the naked girls being watered
when they glisten, I listen as they cry

Reviews

[Collect-Eye]

I guess she answered her own question
meaning, you, of course

the third stanza is amazing, as previously stated, and it drips, in circumlocution w/ the rest brilliantly, or however you intended it to be.. I love words, too.

did you flip flop those stanzas, plan it, or did it just come out that way? I'm just wondering, cause sometimes I move them around.

[Isolophobe]

love the addition of the last stanza. cringe worthy in a way only the esoteric can inspire.

[Hedra Helix]

beautiful, ;0 soft lovely poignant.

only thing is:

I was a girl that dissolve like salt

do you want an s on the end of dissolves?

[Isolophobe]

Absolutely love the last two lines. its a sensible truth that I quite admire the delivery of. THe first stanza is a psalm of the soul, if I ever saw one.