my hands aren't cold

changes in life are changes

it's not a constant burn, it's a curiosity,

a need to know and learn,

dearly beloved, i seem to constantly forget

the dips and planes that make up the outline of you

and i must take it upon myself to reorient and regroup with the way that you just

are

i want to trace the contours of you and learn and relearn you

i want to familiarize myself with the borders of you, map out the lines that dip and swell and make up the essence of

you

every now and then i'll look at my hands and suddenly remember the feel of you

i’ll look at my wrists and remember the scent of you

i’ll move and i remember the warmth of you

and then it's gone and i find myself reaching for you to remember and remind myself that maybe i never understood that

 

i love you

 

quietly

in the soft, quiet hours of the day, between the morning rush and the afternoon traffic

i catch a glimpse of you when i least expect it, when i shouldn't be missing you, but every other night i remember what it was like to be lonely, what it was like to be utterly alone even when surrounded by crowds of people, even surrounded by friends, that it was still possible to feel alone, still possible to feel unloved, and it was still possible to want to be loved,

how the world seemed so gray, and excruciatingly lonely and terrifying to face alone, and how sometimes i couldn't help but wonder how the hell to keep going alone

but with you

i'm starting to see colors i've never noticed before

i'm being coaxed out of my shell, one tiny step at a time, and

my hands aren't cold anymore

because you keep me warm

 

i hope you don't mind the way my fingers seek out yours

i hope you don't mind the way i hug you, the way i hold you

because I love you

can you feel it in the way i kiss you?

Reviews

[SierraT]

This is beautiful, really. So honest and thoughtful, I really like it.

[Mel Carrington]

Thank you. :)