Prompt 7: A Story Redeemed.

A 6-year old, is placed in the care of an adult penitentiary.

It's been said that parenting is the most rewarding job in the world. This is a lie. Parents only say this to keep their sanity, because there's nothing rewarding about dealing with temper tantrums under the collective gaze of onlookers, or apologizing because their kid just dropped a deuce in the ball pit at the Chuck E. Cheese.

Why so many adults feel the need to complicate their lives by having a crying parasite is beyond me, but they can ruin their lives however they see fit. Just as long as they don't involve me: therein lies the problem.

In an age where bankers are made of Teflon, many social programs were given the ax. I'm sure most do not care where a junky goes for methadone, but people should care about juvenile rehabilitation centers. Juvey (as the kids call it) wasn't placed under the same domain as adult correctional institutions. As a result, some pompous a*s in legislation took the funding away. This act funneled kids into the adult system, and forced some inmates into babysitting.

Let’s face it; babysitting is the worst job in the world. I would rather go to a five hour lecture about tax laws, than to watch someone else's brat for thirty minutes. Needless to say, I was none too pleased when my cell door opened for Jaden Davenport.

Being nothing more than a sandy blond snot ball in prison whites, I ignored him by staying on my bunk, while reading a book, until the guard pushed him and said, "Got a new playmate for ya, Derick."

I looked up, just as the handcuffs were being taken off him, and watched as the guard reached between the bars to ruffle the boy's hair. "Have fun little guy." He laughed and walked away sounding like Jacob Marley on the night he visited Ebenezer Scrooge.

We stared at each other for a moment, and it was amusing to see how much caution he took moving away from the door. Holding his bedding in front like a shield, he pointed to the top bunk. "Is that where I'll sleep."

I had to smile at that, "Nope. You don't get a bunk."

The boy started to cry, forcing me to reveal my intentions. "Calm down, will ya. You'll get to sleep there, just as soon as you tell me what you're locked up for."

He used the bedding in his arms to dry his eyes, and I couldn't help but notice the snot on his face had been wiped away too. Kids are so nasty.

"Me and my friends were playing army, and Kevin told us that we should make bombs with bottles and gas."

I stopped him right there. "Who's Kevin?"

"My friend."

"He's not a very smart friend, is he... alright, continue."

"So I made one and tested in the middle of the road, just to see how it would work."

I laughed at that. "It must have worked well, cause you're here now." Upon hearing that, his eyes started to well back up, and his breathing became erratic. Some people just can't take a joke.

Rockwood Correctional Facility was built in the early 1900's. Its block walls and concrete floors can make the feet of a church mouse sound like the footsteps of an angry god, so I apologized for my joke. Lights out was approaching fast, and the last thing I wanted was a bunch of ticked off inmates telling me to keep that boy quiet.

"So you threw the bottle into street, and that's why you're here? That doesn’t make much sense."

"No." He corrected me, "I set the bottle in the street and lit it. I didn't do much, so I kicked it over. Then the fire spread to the field across the street."

"Oh, now I understand, you burned down a farmer's field, huh?"

"No...

I'm really getting tired of being wrong here.

... There was just a lot of tall grass, and it all caught on fire. It spread to a street, on the other side of the field, where an insurance company was, and burned it down."

Burned down an insurance company, now that's a boy after my own heart. "Do you think they denied themselves coverage?"

He didn't get the joke. I didn't care. "Well you passed the test, young one. Now you can have your bunk."

A child's agility is a wonder to behold; he didn't even touch my bunk as he vaulted to his. I went back to my reading, while listening to the sounds of a bed being made... badly. Prison sheets don't have elastic in them, for obvious reasons, and it was clear the boy had no idea what he was doing.

He wrestled with the sheet for a good while, before laying it down flat on his bed. I looked up just in time to see half of his sheet hanging off of his bed.

A guard yelled," Lights out, ladies!" Then our world became dark.

Besides reading, sleep is the only escape from this wretched place and I was looking forward to it. I closed my eyes and began to dream of home. Rounding up all my friends, we would drive to the five-and-dime for some beer, then we'd build a bon-fire and cry around it... cry around it?

I opened my eyes to the sound of uncontrolled sobs from above. This needs to stop right now! I sat up, used the crossbar to hoist myself up, stood on my bunk like a step, and peered at an inconsolable mess.

He was lying on his stomach, with his face buried in the pillow, and I reached out and shook him lightly by the arm. "Hey, stop that, you're going to get us in trouble."

He looked at me, and I was grossed out by the amount of snot he had produced. He started to speak, and I reminded him to keep his voice down.

"I'm scared, and there's no nightlight here."

"The freaking moon is your nightlight. Damn boy, how old you?"

He buried his head again, and through the sobs and snot I heard, "I'm six."

I knew he was young, I just didn't know he was that young. "Okay, look, is there anything I can do to make you go to sleep?"

That lifted the boy's spirit a little. "My mom always tells me a bedtime story."

Oh, Jesus. I've read many books in my ten years at Rockwood, but Stephen King nor Graham Masterton wrote "Goodnight Moon." so I was screwed. "Okay fine, but I'm not climbing up there. You'll have to come down here for the story."

With enthusiasm, he jumped down and sat next to me. I propped him against the block wall with my pillow, with the condition that he wouldn't use it as a Kleenex, and began the story.

"There once was a boy..."

"How old is he? Does he have a red hat? Red's my favorite color. Can he have a red hat?"

"Fine, yes. He has a red hat. And he's seventeen."

"Seventeen? That's an adult."

"Not to me... can I continue my story?"

"Okay."

"Thanks... So there once was a boy, whose mother was very sick. The doctor told his mother that she needed special medication to stay alive, but some mean people said she couldn't have them."

The boy's eyes increased in size. "Why would they do that?"

"Because the company that made the medication was charging ten dollars a pill, and she had to take one everyday. They didn't want to help pay for such an expense, and told her she would have to pay on her own."

I was so into my story, I didn't even notice the boy had rested his head on my shoulder. "So the boy did some research and found out that it only cost the company thirty-five cents to make the pill. That was upsetting news, and the boy decided to take action. He broke into the company, found the pills, and took them. Unfortunately, the boy didn't realize..."

Hearing a light snore, I stopped the story. He had fallen asleep on my shoulder and I must admit he looked cute... until I noticed the drool. Fan-tastic.

That was the beginning of my new life, and it dawned with a stiff neck and a stain on my sleeve. He held the back of my shirt, as we walked to the chow hall, and the cook gave him a double helping of eggs. Normally that would be enough to cause a fight, but there was something that felt right about giving the kid more. I just shook my head and smiled as the cook gave me the shaft.

Things were indeed changing at Rockwood. Like all prisons, the yard was divided up by racial lines, and I figured that's the way it would always be. I was wrong; over on the far wall stood a large group of men from all different races. They were cheering and clapping, so Jaden and I walked over there, and noticed other kids were playing soccer.

Jaden got all excited, and asked me if he could play. I nodded, and held my breath every time he touched the ball. I cringed when he fell, I willed him to run faster, and I cheered like a madman when he made a goal. I was high-fiving guys that I'd never met before, and it struck me how men could learn so much from a child's innocence. I was proud, and my smile showed it.

I appreciated him, and I taught him many things: how to fold his bed sheets, and how to kick a soccer ball with more force, and he soon returned the favor.

Since he was a kid, law required him to enroll in classes at the prison. When I told him I had done that for him... he was anything but happy. I calmed him down, a little bit, by telling him that I would walk him to and from the classroom, and I sweetened the deal by giving him my sugar packets when cereal was served for breakfast.

I was so nervous the first time I dropped him off at school. Will he make friends? I hope he does well in class, and doesn’t act up. Oh God, what if he gets sick: were all thoughts than ran through my head, and I almost had a nervous breakdown while walking back to our cell.

I paced the whole time he was gone, and asked the guard every time he passed if it was time for me to go pick up Jaden. He just laughed at me. "Not yet Derick... relax, man."

As time went on, school proved to be a good thing for Jaden. He was smart, and his specialties were math and science. I tried helping him with his homework, only to find out that he was teaching me.

I learned everything from calculating an area, to how atoms bonded together, and I was astonished by his brilliance. I knew he would be alright in the free world... but it pained me to think about it.

Five years we lived together, and the night before his release, I was the one who was sobbing in their pillow. Jaden heard me, and jumped down from his bunk. He sat down next to me, and smiled. "You want me to tell you a story?"

I laughed so hard at that, and told him, "No, I don't wanna hear one of your stupid stories."

We laughed together, and hugged. "You're going to do just fine Jaden... I know it."

Fourteen years on and I still felt a pain in my heart, until a letter came:

Dear Derick,

You didn't want to hear my stupid stories in the past, but maybe now you will. I graduated from college with a double major in business, and chemistry. Using those degrees, I have started my own pharmaceutical company.

My company buys up expensive patents, so we can make the drugs and sell them to consumers at a fraction of the cost.

I have also started an advocacy group, which takes on the injustice of the medical world.

I wish to thank you for all you have taught me. Without you, I would still be the boy crying in the middle of the night.

Yours, with love and respect,

Jaden Davenport, C.E.O. Chemical Cures, Inc.

I probably had the dumbest smile on my face when I read that, but I didn't care.

I'm so proud of you Jaden, and I love you so much.

Author's Note

This is for a contest and, weather I place or not, this was a lot of fun to write. I can only hope you have as much fun reading it.

Any corrections would be appreciated.

Reviews

[Woody]

this is a delicious story (can we say that?)
the narrative, the wit, the endearing characters. I enjoyed the read.
the bitter sweet ending was good too.
the only thing that bothered me a tiny bit was the fact that a little boy was incarcerated with adults!
for me it was the only fly in the ointment. however, I truly had a good read.

[Kayja Symphious]

Sure I don't see why that can't be said.

Yeah, a lot of people have said that. This story is based off of a prompt for a contest. Because he is so young, I felt the need to make it as lighthearted as possible.

I'm happy you enjoyed it, cause I have certainly enjoyed your works.

[Woody]

I understand. still, it's kind of unbelievable. what's more, he's put in the same cell as an adult!!
now, if I were you, I'd explain right from the start that it's a weird town, or system or whatever. you know, prepare the reader to accept this strange situation. see what I mean?

[Kayja Symphious]

Ah! I see you point. I agree, that would be better. I already have some ideas popping up.
read moreAh! I see you point. I agree, that would be better. I already have some ideas popping up.

Good call Woody!

[Jamie]

The prompt was the reason for a child's incarceration with adults. That's why.

[Woody]

I understand. it just didn't sit well with me. as I said, you must follow the prompt but at the same time you need and idea to make it acceptable by the reader, no matter how preposterous.
anyway, that's my opinion but I repeat that apart from that, the story is well told.

[Jamie]

would you mind reading mine? I wrote a really short one on the same prompt.

[Mila]

Very well written, it is amazing how you came up with this amazing story off of the provided prompt. A well deserved win! :)

-Mila

[Jamie]

Awwwwwww! Love it! Made me smile!

[Kayja Symphious]

I'm glad you liked it. I've read that you are in the same contest, so I'm looking forward to reading your prose.

[Kringefest]

The only thing I advise is to go through the story again to correct any grammatical/spelling mistakes. Other than that, I believe the story was witty and you executed such a splendid story. I laughed a little and I felt a bit sad when Jaden had to leave, albeit the story ended quite abruptly. I really enjoyed reading this, well done! (:

[Kayja Symphious]

Thank you for the advice, and thank you for the read.

I have noticed some mistakes, and I will be correcting them. Also, I look forward to reading some of your works, I have a feeling they are going to be good!

Once again, thank you.

[Kringefest]

Haha, no problem, and thank you for writing this!

[EsdeeAyo]

First, I think the real injustice here is a system that sends six-year-olds to prison. Derek can hate kids as much as he can, but no one will ever hate them as much as the judge that made that decision.

But I understand the intentions here. The act of raising and caring for a child changes people (hopefully for the better). And as ridiculous as the situation is, it provides a good degree and humor. Derek's disbelief is great when the kid enters his cell, and while his jokes fall flat in the story, they certainly had me laughing. And just like Derek, snot makes me cringe too.

After Derek's story, it did feel a little rushed, but for sake of the contest I'm not sure if you were restricted by word count or anything. If that's the case maybe in the future you could expand on those five years cause I want to read about them.

[Kayja Symphious]

It is rushed at the end, for that reason. My mind has a tendency to make everything a novel, and I really could have with this one. Most of my ideas I had to scrap, just so readers wouldn't be bombarded with a week long mission of reading this.

I'm glad you liked the jokes! I laughed while writing them, knowing that the kid would be looking back at Derick in a blank stare. HA!

Thank you for the read, EsdeeAyo

[Jonas]

Okay, it firstly made me smile All the way down. It's pretty comedic, I can tell you that. It's something I have failed at since... well, forever because people can't take a damn joke. But you executed it greatly. Congratulations.

Also just some correcting, "Apon hearing that," should be "Upon hearing that," just a little pet peeve I had on that. But apart from that, loved every word of it.

[Kayja Symphious]

I' so glad you have that pet peeve, Jonas. I would have never had found that. I'm glad it made you smile! I smiled a lot while writing this out. To be honest, I was a little concerned about the beginning part, but it seems to be okay by most people.

[Jonas]

I actually agree with the beginning 100% so you're secure on that.

[Marie]

This is really good. I enjoyed reading it.




Things were indeed changing at Rockwood. Like all prison's, the yard was divided up by racial lines, and I figured that's the way it would always be.(D onot make "prisons" possessive.)

[Kayja Symphious]

Thank you so much! I'm glad you enjoyed it. Also, thank you for the tip, I will change that!