Senseless

Maybe they're correct
Perhaps I am too shallow for any
They say I wish for the attention 
Lies! 
You know not the contents 
Of my black, sickly yet filling heart
I ask, if I feel not,
Then why do I wish the self-inflicted
Pain, because he doesn't care?
Why do I kill myself slowly
For something he may fail to recognize 
As a problem?
I control music to screech in my ears
The only sound that is louder
Than my conscious wanting me to hurt
Hurt, one thing that I already feel
Blame, one lack of knowing how to deal
My past hasn't even the chance yet
To heal to scars my recent inflictions
Why waste my time; beg and plead?
When the only thing that I want is to bleed?
If it isn't you, then it has to be me
For no word, no language
Would ever make sense to you,
Would ever make you see
Double standards, bullshit!
You step on me, must I hand you the crown?
Yes, you can do no wrong
You can never hurt
And you mock me, you laugh
Because in life I face problems
There's nothing more straightforward than so
And when my claims are that you care not,
What do you say?
Nothing.
You make my head surge with pain already!
You can be angry every day
While I can't have any
But a great one
F**k you! Why are you still here?
My affections, they have a price 
Care for me, is all I ask 
Apparently asking you to love is too much
But all I want is your care