heavy heart #1

* part 1

 

 

 

 

Which is heavier, my body or this heart of mine?

 

The quantity of the heart is much harder to reassure.

Life is full of assumptions and depressing pressures.

Undecided but I’m riding the ocean waves.

Instinct is my driven force, wanting to be brave.

 

I walk in a road where the path has a dead glow.

I kiss the shadow of nothing, to endure - I bow.

Obedient as I am, the ocean is my starting point, down below

       to where I creep and swim in slow-mo.

 

My feet had grown cold doing what he has been told.

The needy feeling had gone old.

 

I open my heart to go bold.

Just another piece of my life unfolds.

Author's Note

Photo credits:

Week 27 - I Was A Heavy Heart To Carry
by
anuelestheim

This is the first of the series of poems I made this week.

a series of the heart & Mind:
1. ) Heavy Hear #1
2. ) Vast Space #2
3. ) Silent Scream #3
4. ) ~ Land of Poets ~

Reviews

[Pax]

Such a piece of art... the photo, drawn to gravity, as the body and the words, both make a heaviness of the realm. (but beautiful) there is pain in your words, that always bring the best art above. So admire that. "waiting to be brave?" he? I don't get that line, you "ARE" already, by posting it bro. Many can't are struck in their neurotic silent realms, you are just opening here, opening up. That's courage! uh, nothing but courage!!!!

"Obedient as I am, the ocean is my starting point, down below
to where I creep and swim in slow-mo."

What a beautiful line full of deep thought, as deep an ocean can be, and as we tend to be both water signs, it's you that keeps the head up in this... slo-mo, speaks for "being aware" of that moment, of below ness. You are aware you are swiming slow-mo, so you control your dreamy mind, in thought, to realisation. I know deeply the metaphor is related to your beautiful country and all that is happening there, my heart is with you and yours.

Know I'm on the other side of the world, but my heart is Asian, and living and loving each happening.
Please "let the feeling get "OLD" so you can be there in your beyond ages, and future still for your folk"
You're an artist people need to read, need to live by. You did the best you could with this astonishing write, to reach out, not only for yourself, but for any human being, that's in suffering, you are so selfless, it's giving a golden ray around your picture, ;) aura pax borealis almost ;) instead of aurora borealis ;) xx

- Elisa

[Pax]

ahh, you bring light big sis, thank you for that... always! I can't thank you enough... you words here dugs deep, truly touched... so glad you understand me so well... there are still many things I am not so brave off, I am still finding that courage to open the lock door, processing in slow-mo everything that had happened...

I have read this few many times now(this review and the poem and also every one's understanding), and processing really good to feel every word you say and others as well...

I am being courageous because I have a family here, specially i have a great big sis here...one of the wall flower of wc :)...

sigh... such wonders in words... many more hugs coming...

You know, bro, I"m just happy and proud of you, that you're always writing, bringing art, living life, the fullest..... I am just here to praise your beauty, as you deserve that. And I look up to you! :) always be the selfless heart, you are for others... shine, bright my brother star :) I'm smiling.

[Poetic Beauty]

The trials of life can be daunting and feel as if the weight of never ending space is hanging on them dripping with stars and suns ready to explode. What is heavier the body or the heart? I would have to say the heart always weights heavier. The emotions weigh us down much more than actual weight.

[Pax]

Thank you so much, I am so glad you understand, indeed more often my heart weights me down... but i never give up, keeping myself strong to carry the heaviness.... trials I shall surpass in time... I so appreciate your thoughtful review.

[Poetic Beauty]

We if wait long enough the trials do move on and don't seem so strong later down the road. Raw emotions take time to dwindle. It was a heart on the sleeve kind of piece and well done.

[Pax]

you are so right, but then there are some trails that needs more time to built up the courage to face it fully, some person are very aware of it, they are just finding the right moment, right time, right place to do so... :) thank you agian ms Beauty. :)

[Poetic Beauty]

You are quite welcome

[Coyote Poetry]

I believe heart control the body and the mind. A broken heart can leave us wanting and needed nothing. A broken body can heal with time. The poem is very good. I like poetry that open the door to question and possibilities. This poem did. Life is fair. Do the right things and you will be okay. Live for the wrong things. You can be left alone to swim in your mistakes. Thank you for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote

[Pax]

I do admire, always those shared wisdom my friend... thank you for that.

Life is fair. Do the right things and you will be okay. Live for the wrong things. You can be left alone to swim in your mistakes.

~ I believe that is true, but in some way we do sometimes or more often swim in our mistakes, and in that way we learned something to swim back, unless you'll be lost in the depths. The beauty of life is understanding its high depths.

again thank you my friend

[NeiL ArandA]

I just start to realize the therapeutic value of poetry . Here we can express our pain and deep sorrow without being so discreet ..Since we use metaphor our intentions and motives are conspicuously hidden to many or innocent bystander . Yet its plain simple and wide open for those who truly knows the heartfelt sound and language of a bleeding heart . Poetry allows us to express the inexpressible . It makes us unique . Almost beyond normal unless we allow it to get over our head. and think we're better than others then by our own ego and pride we have reduced ourselves to merely " Hand Shakers " .
Poet has that special gift to write express and perceived other peoples pain though concealed un words . Like some poet most people in the church are good in extending handshakes but not not in seeing the heartaches . Have we listen to the melody of a puff up heart ?

[Pax]

Neil, my friend, a big thank you. I really do appreciate and really admire those friends of mine that listen, beyond the poems depth. I am always grateful with that, you included. This series is quite personal to me, questions of the mind and the heart... all fragments of me at the moment. Thank, thank you again for your shared insight and for listening...

[Shep]

A very tender, and very beautiful. Nicely done.

[Pax]

thank you, my friend.

[Gypsy Warrior Queen]

I was in Louisiana for both hurricane Katrina and Rita....I slept lil in days between the two and had violent nightmares of the sounds inside. I felt much fear in my heart...even when weather and nature had never bothered me before. I watched as we evacuated and felt the terror in souls. For months after our return I could smell death and decay as the winds blew certain ways. Our family lived in a camper for a year while we rebuilt. Like zombies our bodies preformed tasks even when exhausted for our minds couldn't watch those who suffered more than those of us that left.I feel so much that I would like to forget in your words but you remind me how real and fierce both life and death can be...how pressing the need to feel them is. I send out all my prayers and hopes for your people! You are so strong.....I know you will endure. I wrap you in my love today and hug upon you healing.

[Pax]

thank you so much dear friend, know that you've been missed here. I remember when I was young, there was a typhoon in town. A star apple tree feel down in front of our house with me a few inches away from being crush in that part of the house. I was little back then, like any other experience, it makes us strong. In our country every year, at least there is two to five typhoons will passed. But this one that hit us, is like no other. It's a storm surge, almost equivalent to a tsunami effects. Perhaps our people was not well aware of its strong power, because the usual typhoons are not as strong as this one. It's the first. Last time Dec. 2011, our town was hit by a strong flood, also a typhoon, that many had died as well. Our house was almost wash out, but I am glad my family was safe. Now this year is far worst, because the death toll are much higher, the damage was catastrophic. You know, I believe climate change affects our country the most. Just before the Hiayan typhoon, there was an earthquake that shook and damages old churches and houses. That’s two natural disasters in one year. I feel sad for this events, I hope this Christmas, it will bring hope and courage to rebuild and stand up again for a better future… hugs to you my friend, I am grateful to you always…

[Sami Khalil]

The weights on the heart are heavier than the body not doubt about it. I feel torn and saddened for the events in your country for I prayed for speedy recovery. Life is short and fragile and the end is very near but we will be in eternity one day and time. I like the way you say at the end : life unfolds for life unfolds with so may surprises that we expect and not...An excellent write...:)..............

[jacob erin-cilberto]

the heart outweighs the body by an ocean's breath..and that is a very long, wide and heavy breath.

i am glad you are okay, Pax...and my prayers are with those unfortunate people in your country who have suffered because of what is happening there.

jacob

[Caradoc]

I really like this poem.

Your first stanza had such strong emotion in it. There was a deep pain and yet a desire to be strong, to endure and overcome the pressures and obstacles of life. In the second stanza you speak of the road, the journey, towards something, a nebulous uncertain destination. With that, there is sorrow, and the image of the road's dead glow was very bleak, giving the sense the world around you is faded and grey, almost lifeless. Still, you endure it, bowing to the will of the waves, going with the flow. Still, you end with the sense of being stuck, unable to move forward as freely as you'd like.

The final stanza got a bit confusing for me, I think due to your word choice. However, I think I sussed out the meaning. This stanza is about hope and despair. You speak of cold feet and the feeling of needing something vanishing. You no longer wish to continue this way, though your will is slipping, that endurance you held so strongly to in the past stanzas has faded. You still wish be brave and strong though, you just aren't sure if you can do it anymore, as this feels like what your life now is...as if it will remain that way.

This is an extremely powerful piece my friend. Sure it could use some clean up, and if you wish I can message you some suggestions, but still the message is loud and clear. I have to say, don't give up. Ride the waves because you can make it. The bleakness of the road's dead glow won't remain forever.

I hope things change for the better soon, Pax. As much as I like this, I do wish you had cause for much happier pieces.

-Caradoc

[Pax]

I'm always speechless on how you see my poems my friend. Exact and vast understanding. I admire that, as a friend I admire you the most. I could see that you understand me so well as you have read my other poems and see the connection, they always does, for in fact my poems are my journals, my deepest thoughts.

I understand your confusion on the last stanza, yet there is a hidden connection to the other stanza. Sorry about the last stanza, I edit it now, the first two sentence must be separated to the last two sentence.

The last two sentence talks about how I open up this piece. And the first two are my frustration, perhaps it’s too long to explain, or I just have mixed feelings on it. Sometimes I think that I always follow what ‘they’ say, or I just don’t have the heart to follow what I really want, that often times I become undecided, becoming confuse with no sense of direction – and with that most of the time I just go with the flow.

A huge thank you my friend.

[Caradoc]

Ah, I see. You're most welcome my friend, always.