Keeping me at bay

 

Words can’t describe how I missed you in my arms.

The scent of your skin had erased the longing I feel.

My heart beat is in tune with yours.

A night’s romance ends with a warm hug.

A hug that takes my worries away, keeping them at bay.

It’s been long my love, but it’s worth the wait.

Because now I am here with you

And that’s all that matters.

Author's Note

photo credits to :
wendy

Reviews

[Caradoc]

Simple, elegant and beautiful.

And I thought to call myself the poet prince...

I would like to make a few suggestions as to the wording. Only minor mistakes, given tense and whatnot.

Sentence 2; 'have' should be 'has' and changed 'erase' to 'erased'. That keeps the tense constant.

Sentence 5; this one is a bit more tricky. I think what you were going for it to say that the hug removes your worries and makes sure they do not bother you. If that is the case, I would alter 'makes', changing it to 'takes' and change 'me' to 'them'.

Sentence 6; I would change 'to' into the word 'the'. Or you could go a different route and put the word 'it' before 'to'.

Aside from those things, which the alterations are merely suggestions based on what I think you were going for, this is great. I enjoyed the romance here, my friend.

-Cara

[Pax]

I'm so, so glad you've enjoyed this book my friend, and thankful for your help... this was a quick write, trying to hold that feelings and write it down fast or it will be forever lost in the distance of my mind and heart... know that i am always grateful to you...

[Caradoc]

I know how that goes. I've "lost" more than a few poems that way. I'm glad I could help.

[Dhaye]

This is beautiful. Perfect. I think you don't need ice bags here. LOL

[Pax]

LOL, thank you, naka gamit nakaya ako ng ice bags dyan kay cara, magaling din yan mag edit...kasi...

[Shep]

Nice and romantic that speaks to the heart

[Baby Ricochet]

Beautiful poem mr pax. Outstanding work

[Pax]

Thanks my friend. I really do appreciate you coming by.

[SHEEMA HUQ]

You capture the whole essence of being reunited, nice work.

[Pax]

I just love that feeling, I missed that kind of feelin - been away for long now...
thank you my friend.

[Pax]

And it's all that matters, when it's true love, well spoken here Paxie, I loved the honesty, and the romance of true quill flowing through your ink... you're a sincere man, bro, and friend.... even if it's maybe fictional, I still believe it, which means the world to me, that's what's writing is about, you know?

It's just all that matters.... he and she.... she and he.... no world to watch, just to enjoy eachother.
Well done bro. It's good to be back!

- Elisa

[Pax]

hugs tight!
~ thanks you so much, I hidden feeling on this piece is I missed home, it's been long and I'm still here under the sands of the desert. It's really good to see yah around big sis, its always a pleasure to see you...

Oh feel with you on that one, I feel like I've not seen mine in a while, but not as long as you your family I know, I have nothing to complain .... :))) that's why I'm your sis, here, so you're never alone love.... :D I'm so happy to see you too!

[gabrielle]

"Because now I am here with you
And that’s all that matters." ---perfect way to end it.

[Pax]

Thank you Gab, this is one of the simplest among the rest... just enough AND not too much..