stench of my bitterness

           I float in the valley of tears.

Resting and contemplating the fears

  I tried to hide and compress.

Then I breath-in the putrid stench of my bitterness.

         Isolation has come to its hollowed broodiness.

Why must I touch in manic solemnity

     the borders of your loyalty?

Though I felt it was meant to be,

But then I know it was so wrong

                      a mistake that gone prolong. + + +

           Until we were on the edge of loss

       conflict of families that we had caused.

 

Family, cousin, friends and lovers turn their back on us

            As if we’re such a huge embarrassment

             I can’t blame them for their confinement 

                            much farther away from us. . .

But what I can’t take is that you abandon me as well,

                                      without any reason to tell.

You have left me on the dark corners.

            Now alone in this vast waters,

                    feeling the waves that never come

                                 waiting, waiting till the end~

 

Author's Note

this is quite sad and lonely poem... i wonder...

Reviews

[gabrielle]

how can something so deeply melancholic can at the same time be so equally beautiful?
You really have ways of weaving words kabayan. It truly touches the emotions. As to the content, i would say that it mirrors reality as sometimes "against all odds situations" just end up to nothing but then this is not always the case. I think this sad poem just made me a pessimist. ..^_^.. Beautifully penned as always.

[Pax]

thank you dear kabayan, a very nice smile you have there.. :)

[Robbie~xoxo~]

The first line grabbed me, and from there I was pulled under with you. The bitterness could fester in those waters, feeling alone, abandoned, and betrayed. You have expressed an honest emotion. Nicely done Pax!

[Pax]

thank you so much my friend... you have describe all the feelings on what i was trying to conveyed... sometimes i don't want to swim on those waters but in life we have to swim across it to become a better person in reaching the end... staying in it for too long is not good like the man i describe on the poem... you are great my friend.

[Michael X]

This poem is what happens when sadness makes love to loneliness, a deep, pensive, and long-lasting, almost infinite grief at the passing of a love gone too soon.The form casts a marvelous shadow, enjoyable read that is a cup overflowing with personal insight.

[Pax]

your words filled with wisdom itself my friend... you have such keep insight that is truly admirable, thank you so much...

[SHEEMA HUQ]

compassionate thoughts, so carefully worded.......

[Pax]

thanks for the visit and review Sheema.

[MOON]

Deep and sad well expressed, the utter loneliness and sense of abandonment. Feeling the waves that never came great imagery never reaching the high , the joy. Lov ely write.

[Pax]

Thank you dear Moon. Its always pleasure when you come by.

[KAOlmsted]

Stop trying to rhyme...just...write, dude. Yeah? Just f*****g write (pardon my f*****g French) Sorry.

[Pax]

haha... no problem, i appreciate that... rhyming indeed is my weakness ...can't cope up with it... :) thank you for your advice...

[KAOlmsted]

I wouldn't have commented if you were not I writer I respect. My pleasure.

[Pax]

wow, thank you so much I say likewise...

[KAOlmsted]

Do some free verse...you would kill us...kill us baby ;-)

[Pax]

LoL... i will..;)

[KAOlmsted]

;-)

[Dhaye]

It's beautiful! For me, it is so nice
For every sad word makes an art
an art to make my mind wander around
The place you've created, a fantasy land
where every emotion understands
the feelings behind the sad song's resonance.

Kabayan, I like your style. Good job!

[Pax]

Thank you, Kabayan... I'm glad na gustohan mo yung poems ko, truly appreciated.

[Frieda P]

Hopefully is this only temporary insanity, and no longer stands. Love the dark emotions of it, though makes me want to shed a tear.

[Pax]

thank you much dear friend. :)

[Frieda P]

My pleasure dear friend, I do hope the demon depression has lifted it's shadows.

[Pax]

writing really helps me... and the humor i read in your writes and baby R...really is fun... you know a good laugh will lighten the worries negative away..so thanks for sharing your works as well...

[Frieda P]

Yes it helps me too, that's why I like to put a little fun in my work in between the tedious hard work and drama of life...thanks so much!

[Michael G.]

I think you are truly expanding on the talent everyone who reads your work already knows you pocess. Excellent work here, my friend.

[Pax]

thank very much my friend...

[Shadey Jadey]

Very moving, sad but touching

[Pax]

Thank you ms Ash.

[Shadey Jadey]

No worries

[captain]

an emotive piece equally beautiful as well.
well penned Pax.

[Pax]

thank you Cap, always a pleasure to see you around.