It's worth the wait

I don’t know with you, but there’s just incredible magic being in touch with nature, A morning walk with God plus a dog ha-ha.  But seriously, It always amazes me when I’am out walking in the peaceful morning how close I feel to God. How He speaks to me in the language I understand, But there are days when He is silent but it doesn’t mean He isn’t listening to silent prayers or petitions, just His friendship and love and kindness leads me to adore Him, every moment of everyday because most of us we live in the foggy mist of our lives, we often lose perspective. We do fail to realize sometimes if we admit it that happiness do not have to be about the big things. It could be found even in small pleasures like a silent walk with your dog…. Enjoying that fresh, earthy smell after the rain….

Yet today,  I look on trees and I want to saturate them or adjust its curves A.K.A Photoshop them lol but in reality some life stuff  remains raw and sometimes you just can’t edit it… Just you and your hair bun, and the Dog lol where was I? Seriously,  Life is just freaking crazy sometimes and there is no magic wand for every thing. But the beauty of The gospel is it always speaks hope to every situation my beloved…  Know that whatever season you are in life you are the head and not the tail,  Just morning musings because the older I get and see people doing life, the more I realize there are many things I want to accomplish in this life, and I have no desire to stick to one career and be defined by it.

Be encourage, you may have had a few fender benders in life’s travels but with JESUS, the journey with him is so worth it, SO SO worth it!!!! Rest in his Love for you my beloved..

I just like to share this prayer and my heart cry for men and women of this generation….

“I am fighting for men. For their purity and sanctification. I am fighting for their eyes �" that they may see the world not as it is, but as it was created to be: in beauty and not out of lust, in purity and not with intent to be sullied, in majesty and not in menial mediocrity. I am fighting for men and their standards �" that they not settle but fight to find what they were created for: to protect, to lead, to strengthen, to raise up new generations to do the same. I am fighting for men and their hearts �" that they know what sacred gift they hold within: that it, too, is worth fighting for… & that it W I L L be fought for, that it is worth more than being given away for free. I am fighting for you, my future spouse, and the crosses that I will help you bear. You don’t have to do this all alone, for you never have nor will ever be alone. I am fighting for you, and you are worth it.” 

 

Dearest Future Husband,

It wasn’t always easy waiting for you, where are you?… I’m here all alone in my room writing poems about butterflies, flowers and bees lol with my hot coco vanilla  in a stormy weather being mellow dramatic hah. Trying to catch up some Jane Austen movie waiting for the impending doom to be mine , I can conclude my cupid is a procrastinator, and yes He is waiting for the rapture lol; of course I’m kidding!!! Seriously, I believe you were worth waiting for without even knowing your name yet, your location, or time zone. I don’t know what you are doing with your life now, what purpose or destiny that the father is unlocking in your heart.. I know God’s faithfulness and goodness will sustain me even in the waiting.. A new Yes , A new Spirit, And a new Joy in waiting for you…This month, I turn a year older and its getting really awkward being ask how old are you and why you are still single? In my head there are memes that I can throw in for every person I met who ask me that: Being a woman who is “ripe” like an Asian mango for marriage in the Church can be awkward, really awkward..I’ve set up a pretty high standard for guys especially in purity and the gospel of the Lord what I look for is a radical lover and I believe you are one. And for that, I will always be thankful of you. I’m so excited to go to some painting exhibits with you, do some harry potter accent reading, camping, owning a dog,cooking some vegan food and take some tons of picture in many adventures we will have, Spending our weekends going somewhere spontaneous,ministering to the lost and the poor, preaching and healing the people. And laughing our belly out in some spontaneous dance showdown in our kitchen.. But most of all just stopping for the one, Thankful for your leadership for pushing me to become a prayerful woman, that everyday as we open our eyes you bow low in prayer, You strode past my barriers and came into my life. You have seen my brokenness yet you see it as an invitation to Love, You are a great example an epistle read by many, you are so best in giving all your attention and honour to the person in front of you.  But I know there are days that it will be hard, there are days that we will have different views in every situation life handing us , there are hard days and bright days wrapped in hope,  You are the kindest person in the world who has a gentle love.  You have no burden or pressure to perform. I’m sorry for the times I will be moody or cranky its just I have a very sensitive spirit, I love long walks with you just talking about God, food, animals, the galaxies or just crazy random topic that we can dive into… Sorry for having trust issues because I have dark deep brutal past about love that screwed me over.  I just remembered in my college years, the mass flood of purity rings and marriage books, all Christians who wanted to honour God with their sexuality and their future marriages.  I did them all of that years ago I thought I would have a happily ever after but God’s grace has carried me through that time of brokenness but never give up on purity… I pray that you value the SECRET PLACE more than ever, that you will not just be carried by societies standard but your heart solely focused on Jesus alone, you  treat every women with respect and dignity, you are refined as gold, thank You  for walking in integrity and purity,That wherever you go God’s presence is in you, thank you for being a presence dweller, thank you for Hosting heaven all the time, you are the person who never entertains negative talk about others, you treat everyone so much value and love because you SEE how heaven sees a person. Thank you for teaching me how to love well, how to never give up in life. I’m not  making an assumption that isn’t grounded in truth but I know in my heart that you are one heck radical lover and you possess beauty even if I haven’t locked eyes with you yet… thank you for the laughter, You are a shining joy to all around you…  You have such a noble heart, a steadfast spirit and has a  passionate pursuit for holiness and that is so sexy.. Thank you for being just you, no pretension, no costume involved.. Thank you for not giving up on my weirdness and my melancholic side, thank you for pursuing me and loving me as CHRIST loves the church, thanks for understanding all my quirks and all my drama in life hehe… Thank you for being such a best friend to me, my laugh mate, brain mate, cook mate, adventure buddies, a person who only pulls gold in my heart, I have never known a love that exist like this, You’re a great warrior for the KINGDOM , you look for the poor, you are the hands and feet of JESUS you bring so much joy in my heart, I’m so so proud of you.There is something God breathed inside of you that the world needs.  When I’m with you,  be blown away by the lifestyle of the supernatural in you. Power and purpose and the roar of the lion in you, You are awakening hearts and rescuing souls, You let me allow to dive in the heart of the father even more, So much in you that fascinates me, You welcome the sounds of heaven into the earth realm today. You are a catalyst, You are man redeemed by God…I pray that even now you will be surrounded by Godly men to mentor you to true manhood, that you will be a voice to broken insecure men, that your life’s testimony will be an inspiration and a legacy that you will built upon many generations together. you are releasing a fragrance of CHRIST that will impact many lives. From you I learned more of God’s LOVE towards people…. I can only imagine jammin with you, making some live boomerang just being goofy and silly, The ice cream dates, the crazy laughter, your still hot coffee, my lovely cup of  tea, the rain, the thunder storms… all the silly things we will enjoy in this life time.. But  most of all, we can be serious and we don’t shy away  from hard conversations like money and family, ministry, work and other stuff.

Thank you for protecting my heart, Thank you for not letting go of me… Thank you for being vulnerable with me, For entrusting your heart to this fragile thing called life. Every waking hour is a celebration with you. You sprinkle every mundane moments with extraordinary color and passion and love. I’m in tears in awe of How God hand’s love transformed you.You showcase the gifts of the holy spirit you free people from demonic darkness your lifestyle of prayer is way remarkable, you are strong yet so gentle at heart, its a great honour to partner with you in life. I believe you are praying for me, you are not just a man saturated by latest photos, hipster millennial lifestyle but you are truly a man of prayer with a humble, meek heart… history-making and history-changing watchman. A modern day Daniel…  my dearest, waiting with anticipation for you! Wherever you are in the globe you’re prayed for,and greatly missed. JESUS has been preparing my heart to steward yours.. And preparation time is not a wasted time. I know we are far from perfect, I celebrate every crack in our hearts and joyful admiration of How God redeemed his son and daughter into a wonderful master piece For HIS glory.. 

BECAUSE darling… 

You are  so worth the wait…. 

Sincerely,

ELLA / wildflower #prayerformyfuturehusband