Almost Fearless Girl

A reflection on a life long unrequited love.

Almost Fearless Girl

I know a girl I have never known.
She is fearless, almost.

I wanted to know her, but she wouldn’t, or couldn’t, let down her guard
To allow it.
She almost did once, or maybe twice.
But too much transpired before we met.
Too many decisions she made to protect herself from more pain and sorrow.
Too many mistakes I made that reinforced her decisions in the matter.

I wanted her to know me.
She tried.
She knows me as well as anyone could
Who only saw me through her eyes
And heard me through her ears
Processing all she saw and heard through
Her mind
Her soul
Her wounded heart.

She thinks it was strength that kept her guard up
Keeping us apart.
But I wonder if it was fear...

William Wilder
3/17/2019