brilliant blue

not for you are the lonely lights,
the suitcase and the doorway out,
these shoes are not for your feet,
says my heart, almost staying,
without you, for you are the moon,
bruised by a star, curtained
by clouds, far away from my arms,
that aches with real emptiness,
ghost-whispering in your ears,
facing away from night's echo,
facing the silence, brilliant blue,
crippling its way to take me
by mild surprise at the thought
of you leaving, you live far away
from me, ever since we became
less than lovers, more than friends,
we can't lie anymore to this feeling,
falling in and out of us, fallen between

Reviews

[V]

I love your choice of words in this one. So many good lines in here.

[Ed Hart]

to me
what is brilliant
is your 'voice'
that 'way' with words
(and often structure)
that a poet must evolve
to allow
idiosyncratic expression
from the heart
such as this
which is
brilliantly blue

[GreenShoes]

That was unique and very enjoyable.

[Nisreen]

i guess time tests all feelings
and its natural to fall in and out of love

the idea was always to remain content

i love this write

[Alisa Js]

This one is heartbreaking in its emotional content.

So sad when this happens.

Alisa😳

[Lyn Anderson]

between those two things sometimes there is an ache.

[highonwords]

thank you, kl, for the comment and visit

steph

[Dhaye]

"less than lovers, more than friends,
we can't lie anymore to this feeling,
falling in and out of us, fallen between"
So touching. Falling between lovers and friends is so difficult. This poem is full of emotion and you wrote it well.
Hope you're doing fine. Keep writing.

[highonwords]

thank you, ate dhaye, for the comment and visit

steph

[jacob erin-cilberto]

that brilliant blue can be such a vivid color, and yet one that is a reminder, one that hurts since there is now a feeling that has grown in=-between love and friendship...and distance...

i really like "curtained by clouds" nice use of curtain in past tense as a verb.

j.

[highonwords]

thank you, jacob, for the insight and visit

steph

[redzone]

Steph, I have read your poem several times now and I come back to it and each time I feel even more of the "emptiness" of your arms.. I think Lydi said it best its reads the purgatory actually is, in between, your feelings "fallen between"... you have created one of those poems that sits in your heart and refused to leave... this is a poem that I may have dreams about...

redzone

[highonwords]

thank you curt for the insight and visit

steph

[Lydia Shutter]

There is a thin line in relationships. Once the line between friendship and romance is crossed, though, it is impossible to reverse. "less than lovers, more than friends" is a sort of purgatory. Lots of longing in this one, Steph. I liked it. Lydi**

[highonwords]

thank you, lydia, for the insight and visit

steph