twins

there is something that shines,
deep in the sky, deep in the woods,
more than sunlight, more than leaves,
i can't say if i am more alive,
if it is just my eyes, my heart,
something between us, that eclipses
what is seen by the naked eye,
what is felt by a wounded heart,
not intuition,  an all-seeing eye
not fate, not the stars -
most of all, not the absence of love,
it is there, within and without us,
watching for that stray color,
a toe out of line, a word, whispered,
a thread in the needle's eye, magnified
i'll tell you a story or a prayer,
i know you are listening, wherever you are,
counting to ten, i know from the way
you hold my hand, tapping my palm,
asking my fingers, to count with you,
until the minute is through,
all mystery forbidden, gone

Reviews

[Barbara Walker]

I picked this piece for my first review of your work as the title caught my attention. I am a twin. My sister passed away in Dec. 2013, There are no words to describe the loss.. So of course. I. Like the subject of this piece and the rhythm and flow.. My. Favorite line is "a needle's, eye magnified.", My review would be longer but I am using my phone and irs difficult!. I promise to read more of your work when I have my laptop.

[highonwords]

i am deeply sorry for the passing of your twin sister - i can only say my heartfelt agony over the death of a loved one - this poem i hope spoke to you - thank you so much for your wonderful visit and time and comment :)

my best to you,
steph

[barleygirl]

You've painted an unusual & unique view of what I've heard about twins for years, the way they are connected in an invisible way. Your message is full of examples & details that help us go inside the skin of the narrator, possibly getting to feel a little bit of what this might be like. Good job!

[highonwords]

i tweaked some lines of this poem to smoothen the rough edges - when i wrote it - i didn't know where it was taking me - i don't have a twin - but i've heard about twins having a psychic connection - thank you so much for the lovely comment and visit, margie :)

best,
steph

[barleygirl]

I love your nature references, early on in the poem (forgot to mention that -- I always love it when people use nature to show us feelings). I also love this line: "a thread in the needle's eye, magnified" . . . I re-read your poem & it does sound more smoothly flowing.

[highonwords]

i saw the thread in the needle's eye, very clearly in my mind - had to write it down - thank you so much for the lovely comment and visit :) glad you like the nature references :)

best to you,
steph

[V]

Great one, it possesses again this smooth and pleasurable restlessness I have discovered in your other poems before. Loveable words. Love it in general.

(Somehow I had a writing with the same title in mind yesterday. But more of a short story but didn't manage to write because I was too busy. I still have the concept in my head...)

[highonwords]

oh, i see - i hope you get to write that short story or even write a poem about it - thank you so much for the wonderful comment - truth is i wasn't sure where this poem was taking me, when i was writing it :) thank you so much for the visit :)

best,
steph

[V]

I could feel that a little (that you weren't sure where it was taking you) but turned out to be so well. Maybe I get to write it. I still have so many ideas in my head I'd love to write down but somehow can't, I fail words.